eagle
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Post by eagle on Sept 12, 2020 9:53:35 GMT -8
the longer yewbloom walked, the stronger the pang in his chest reminded him of the last time he had seen his home. even after so many moons, the his paws fell easily into rhythm, as if he had never left. the night of the flood had never left yewbloom's memory: he recalled the sounds of the camp around him falling silent when a patrol came racing back through the entrance, carrying the news that the thaw had come early, and that the rivers and streams had already bushed beyond the banks. and yet, they'd been foolish and careless to think that they would be spared. the senior knights and roses had laughed, and the elders had balked at the slight flare of panic. there was no such thing as a mid-winter flood, they said, only to have their own words thrown back at that, as if by the gods themselves. the sound of cracking woke the clan, to find the waters pressing into camp, and there had been no time to escape before the walls gave way, letting the flood wash them away. yewbloom remembered the feeling of being carried off of his paws, and the sound of his sister's shout when berryjaw tried to grab at him, but it was too late. by the time he had been washed ashore and able to get his paws under him on solid ground, yewbloom knew that he had been washed impossibly far away from highgarden. he found russetpetal not too far away from him, but his other sister must have hit her head along their way, and she didn't wake when yewbloom nudged her. it took time to get his bearings, and no cat he spoke to then had even heard of highgarden. he wandered, on and on until his pads bled, and then he pushed further, but it had been no use. he had been young, foolish, and lost. hope, he found, dwindled fast when there was nothing to hold fast to. the closest piece of home he had was his sister's grave when he buried russetpetal, but he had already put several moons of distance between himself and his sister's body. so he found the next best: he survived. and, along the way, he found that he enjoyed his travels, for all they were worth. for most of his life in highgarden, he had stared out across the borders and wished for the chance to venture elsewhere. more than once, yewbloom wondered if the gods had been mocking him by finally granting his wish. but he wasn't always alone. king tallstep had always told his youngest son that he was sociable, which paired well with the training yellowrose gave to all of her kits to teach them how to hold their heads high, how to walk with a purpose and speak in a way that made them likable. none of them had been as adept as lighteyes, but when compared to berryjaw's resting scowl and tawnystripe's apathy, yewbloom thought that he fared quite well. he liked smiling, he liked talking, and he found that others liked listening to him, even in places where the title "prince of highgarden" meant nothing. there was a tom named jet and his two kits, who yewbloom liked well-enough, an older molly named persephone who told him stories of her time as a member of a rogue group, and a bicolor tom named wolverine who constantly shied from his own shadow and whom, above the rest, yewbloom spent the most time with. together, they spent a rainy spring in the ruins of a twoleg barn, trading stories. wolverine told of his time with his siblings as a housecat, and yewbloom offered stories of highgarden in return. in exchange, yewbloom didn't ask about the yawning gaps in wolverine's stories, and wolverine never asked why yewbloom hadn't gone back to the clan he so clearly loved. truth be told, yewbloom wasn't sure either, not for a long time. not until he had wolverine spent more time together, that was, and yewbloom had the chance to recognize that he was beginning to care for the other tom. and yewbloom knew only too well what happened to everyone he once cared about, and he wasn't ready to see the ruins of his home, just as he wasn't ready to watch his time with wolverine turn sour. he couldn't say what he expected to happen, but he didn't need to lose anyone else, not even when rumors started to reach them that there was a new queen of highgarden. by the time the leaves started to brown and frost gathered across the grassy fields, yewbloom was considering ways that he could leave before wolverine was hurt. when he woke up one morning to find that his friend was gone, yewbloom thought that it was better this way, that it was better wolverine leave before yewbloom did, though there was no denying the way his chest ached in his absence. as much as yewbloom thought that the rumors were fake and that there was no way that his sister could have survived, it was only a matter of time until his paws began to take him back towards highgarden only moons after wolverine left him. the closer he got to home, first catching sight of the mountains in the distance, then hearing the creak of the windmill and the bubble of the streams, the faster yewbloom's paws took him until he was nearly running through the rose pass, skidding to a halt only when he reached the entrance to the camp. for a moment, he could have sworn that his ears deceived him when he heard voices, but the clearing opened before him, and he was allowed a beat to gaze around in awe before he was spotted. eyes began to turn in his direction, but yewbloom didn't hesitate when he stepped forward. "my name is yewbloom, prince of highgarden. i would like to speak to queen lightrose." such were the words that he had prepared during his final stretch of running, easy on his tongue. instead of his sister, a handsome blue-eyed tom stepped forward, his head tipped elegantly in a way that yewbloom recognized from his own practice. "prince yewbloom," the tom said, and his tone was gentle. "my name is softglow, the current king of highgarden." and any other words yewbloom had prepared were thrown away immediately, and he blinked at the supposed king. "you are not my sister's mate," yewbloom heard himself say. "lighteyes was mates with -" "you misunderstand," softglow cut in, managing a tight smile. "i am not lighteyes' mate. tawnyrose is highgarden's queen." realization came slowly, and by the time yewbloom recovered, he realized that there was a new set of eyes boring into the side of his head, and he turned to face the current queen when his sister's familiar voice called out to him. "father always said that you were bad at directions, but i never thought that it was possible for a cat to be lost for as long as you were," she was saying on her approach, coming to a stop when she was a tail-length away. the last time yewbloom saw tawnystripe, it was when she returned from patrol. they had shared only a few words before he decided that he was tired and wanted to sleep before he was due on the dawn patrol the next morning. now, there was a new set to her shoulders that he recognized, but not on her. tawnystripe had always been graceful, but never poised in this way. at last, yewbloom smiled and tawnyrose matched his expression. yewbloom purred and leaned forward, closing the distance between them when he leaned his forehead against his sister's. "don't take this the wrong way," he said quietly, just for her to hear. "but i never thought that i would see you as queen. mother would've had a fit." tawnyrose's laugh when quiet, but not displeased, and she pulled away, shoving gently at yewbloom's shoulder. "i'm sure she's in the stars watching very carefully to see if i ever was paying attention to her lessons," tawnyrose allowed, and yewbloom let out another purr. "you never paid attention to anything mother said, and even less during one of her lectures about tone and how to address others," he said, letting out a laugh of his own. however, movement from the corner of yewbloom's eye caught his attention, and he was already turning when wolverine's voice reached his ears. "yewbloom?" the long-legged tom asked, and yewbloom blinked at him for a long moment before his paws carried him. yewbloom took a tentative step at first, and then wolverine smiled, small and careful, and it was all it took before the ginger tom bundled immediately into his friend. for a moment, it seemed as though they would tip over from yewbloom's greeting, but wolverine managed to stay upright. instead, yewbloom butted his head against wolverine's shoulder. "what are you doing here, wolverine?" he asked through a purr. it wasn't wolverine who answered, but tawnyrose. she had settled where yewbloom left her, letting her brother reunite with his friend. together, the pair looked to the queen when she spoke, stilling long enough for yewbloom to lean against wolverine, and for wolverine to rest his chin on yewbloom's shoulder. "his name's wolverinesnap now," tawnyrose said, and yewbloom immediately turned back on his friend, nudging him again with renewed vigor. "it's true?" he asked, not missing the way wolverinesnap ducked his head bashfully under the attention. "you're a knight now? what happened when you said that you didn't think that you could ever join a clan, hm?" wolverinesnap's smile was shy, and his blue eyes flicked from yewbloom to tawnyrose. the queen had been joined by the same cat who had introduced himself as king, and another white and gray cat who sat at her opposite shoulder. at last, yewbloom gazed across the rest of the clearing, where many unfamiliar faces stared back at him, more than he could have ever thought to have settled in highgarden again. a long-furred queen gathered kits towards her with her tail by the nursery, but one of them broke free. the little torbie bounded forward until she gazed up at yewbloom, and it took the prince only a beat to place the gleam in the eyes that stared up at him. "tawnyrose... i never would have thought..." he trailed off for a moment, glancing from his sister to the little kit before he composed himself. "well, what's your name, then?" he asked, and kit didn't shy away from him. "lightkit, daughter to queen tawnyrose and king softglow, heir to highgarden," she said, with a tone that spoke of having rehearsed the words to find the right cadence, and yewbloom blinked gently down at her. "lightkit," yewbloom repeated quietly. his heart felt full in his chest, his mind whirling from everything that he found, most of which was unexpected. for a moment, his words felt choked in his throat. memories of lighteyes, russetpetal, and berryjaw rose to the forefront of his mind. he thought of his only brother, robinwing, and of yellowrose and tallstep, and all of the rest who had been lost to the flood. for so long he had feared that he lost everyone he could ever care about, but he felt wolverinesnap's presence near his shoulder, he knew tawnyrose stood behind him, and yewbloom looked down at lightkit until he found his words. "my little queen, it is an honor to meet you. my name is yewbloom," he managed at last. "my mother mentioned that she had a brother named yewbloom," lightkit said after a moment of consideration. "we thought you were dead. you weren't here." "lightkit -" softglow cautioned, but yewbloom shook his head slightly. he crouched down to be at-level with the heir to the clan. "you're very smart, little queen," yewbloom said when he was sure that no one else would try to interrupt. he was aware of all of the other clan cats looking at him, watching the proceeding between the little kit and the prince they had never known, but yewbloom let the rest fade away for a moment. "your mother must have told you about the flood, i suppose?" when he received a nod, yewbloom shifted his weight, settling down. "when the flood came, i was taken very far away, further than the horizon. i spent a long time thinking that highgarden was gone, and i met so many cats, cats who didn't even know what a clan was. i saw valleys and mountains topped with snow. i saw twoleg buildings that touched the sky, and i saw moors that stretched as far as i could see, and then further still. i met strangers, i made friends, and finally my paws took me here. i think the gods decided that i had seen enough of the outside, and they decided that i should see my family and home again." again, he felt the weight of stares on him, and heard wolverinesnap take in a breath behind him, but yewbloom didn't look away from his niece. "my little queen, i can assure you that i'm very much alive, and i'd like to be here, if you'd allow me the chance." this time lightkit didn't leave him waiting, and he watched as she grinned, not hesitating before she moved forward, purring as she touched her nose to yewbloom's. "i'm glad you're alive," she said, and yewbloom felt a flash of warmth in his chest. "so am i," yewbloom said quietly, just for her. when he straightened at last and cast a glance first towards wolverinesnap, and then tawnyrose and her court, he couldn't help but smile. "i'd like to come home now, tawnyrose, if i may." but tawnyrose laughed, shaking her head dismissively. "you think i should welcome you back?" she asked, and yewbloom found wolverinesnap's gaze again. when he leaned against his friend, he was surprisingly solid, present where he had been gone for moons, and yewbloom realized that he missed him; he had missed his sister, his friend, and his home for too long. his travels had been long and good, but he'd been away for too long. "i think you'd have a hard time keeping me away."
when merlinsong heard another cat enter the herbalists' den, he had been so focused on his own task of prepping herbs for flickersky's upcoming kitting that he merely assumed that spencer had returned from fetching moss and cobwebs. so, when he called out for spencer to bring him some of the moss and received no answer, he let out a frustrated huff and turned quickly around. "spencer -" he began, only for his mouth to clamp shut when he looked down to where adenium was standing, her wide green eyes gazing up at him. "oh." "i saw spencer talking to bluetcrest outside," the little tortoiseshell supplied with a casual shrug. "it didn't look like he had any moss, though, so i'm not sure he'd be able to give it to you even if he was here." for a long moment, merlinsong gazed at her before he let out a sigh before he turned back to his bundles of herbs. "it's going to snow soon, you shouldn't have left ferretwhisker and the nursery," he said, but he nodded her towards a pile of sticks that he had collected earlier that day. "but since you're here, and i doubt i can get you to go back, you can help me and go through those. sort out the broken or rotting ones." he wasn't sure if he actually expected adenium to help, but she settled at his side without hesitation and pawed through the pile. "i got bored," she said after a long moment of working in silence. at merlinsong's gentle hum, adenium's whiskers twitched. "elkkit only comes up with games that he thinks are fun, beechkit, harrierkit, and dewkit chatter too much about nothing, and quillkit spends almost all of his time watching over lightkit like a hawk," she said, absently, as if it was of no consequence to her, and merlinsong supposed it wasn't. "hawthornkit and bramblekit go out to be with softglow a lot, and snowykit prefers to stay inside." "it is cold out for kits," merlinsong commented, but adenium shrugged. "his name's snowykit, he should be able to manage it," she said, and it took merlinsong a moment to realize that she was joking, and he finally sat back on his haunches to look at her properly. though adenium was young and had only been in the clan for a moon, when arcticblink and wolverinesnap brought her and snowykit, there was a sharp intelligence there that he easily recognized, and he considered her again. "and anyway, ferretwhisker said that we have to be quiet for a while, since flickersky will be having her kits soon. and even then, we'll have to be quiet and not do too much, since they'll be little." "i've found that it's usually a good idea to listen to ferretwhisker, she usually knows what she's talking about," merlinsong said when adenium had gone quiet. after a beat, he reached out to took a stick from between her paws and tested its sturdiness, pleased when it didn't crack. "and you were bored, so you came here, then. why not see if one of the thorns would entertain you? stagpaw usually likes a chance to show off, and daisypaw is very kind, so pythoneyes says, unless you wake her in the middle of a nap." at last, adenium stood and walked around merlinsong. she glanced over the piles of herbs that he had set aside, and when he didn't move to stop her, she leaned forward to sniff at a pile of leaves. when she recoiled, wrinkling her nose at the bitter scent, merlinsong let out a resounding laugh. "i guess i was curious with what you do in here. i've watched stagpaw and rabbitpaw spar in the camp. and they're good but..." when she trailed off, merlinsong tipped his head to one side. "but?" he prompted. "i just don't get why. ferretwhisker said that highgarden has been very safe, and she's been here a long time. what's the point of practicing to fight when there's no fight to be fought? what you do seems more practical. ferretwhisker said that you're going to help keep flickersky and her kits safe." and merlinsong, for his part, felt taken aback by the way adenium spoke. she was eloquent in a way that he hadn't expected from a kit, let alone one as young as she was, and he regarded her in a renewed light, and the gentle smile wavered on his face the longer her words set in. "do you want to know the truth?" he asked, and adenium didn't hesitate to nod, eager. "highgarden has been safe for many moons, it's true. but that doesn't mean that it'll always be safe. we make sure thorns can swim since the flood wiped out highgarden before tawnyrose became queen. we patrol borders to check for any animals that might have crossed boundaries, and we make sure to interrogate cats that come this way so that we know that they won't come to harm us. just because there hasn't been a battle or any fights recently doesn't mean that there will never be one. so stagpaw and daisypaw and the others are being trained not for what hasn't happened, but for what might happen." adenium listened intently, and when merlinsong finished, she nodded thoughtfully. before she could say anything else, however, merlinsong straightened when he heard pawsteps at the entrance of the den, and he leaned forward to lick between adenium's ears. "everything we do here is practical. we never know what's going to come around the next corner." at that, he stood to meet spencer when the lithe tom padded forward, holding a bundle of moss. "finally, i've been waiting for this. we have company." spencer shot adenium a small but kind smile when merlinsong took the moss from him. "i thought we were trying to keep you all in the nursery," he said after greeting adenium, but the other herbalist shrugged one shoulder. "adenium decided that she was an exception, and i agree this time. she's been a great help. she was curious what we do in here, so i'd watch out, or she might be sniffing around to take your position next," merlinsong teased spencer, who balked, turning his wide blue eyes from merlinsong to adenium. "so soon?" he asked, and this time adenium shrugged and went back to sorting through the sticks while merlinsong checked through the moss to make sure that it was dry. "merlinsong said you were taking too long. you snooze, you lose." at that, merlinsong couldn't contain his booming laugh, and spencer joined in. when he had calmed, merlinsong winked at adenium, who smiled down at the sticks, though there was no forgetting what she had been told.
erasmus felt the restlessness stir deep in his bones, making him feel trapped, just like he already knew he was. eyes followed each and every move he made, making his skin crawl like he was covered in fire ants, and it seemed that bluetcrest and sagecloud weren't even trying to pretend otherwise any longer. in the beginning, it seemed, they had tried to keep their actions inconspicuous, like it just so happened that sagecloud was constantly on the same patrols as him, or that bluetcrest also wanted to go to the stream to get a drink of water. at first it had been almost amusing, it see the way they squirmed and tried to find a way into his head, but the longer it dragged on over the moons, and when it became clear that erasmus knew what they were doing, it quickly lost its pleasure and erasmus needed to find a way out. so he waited until nighttime, when sagecloud had been shipped off to strikersclan for the evening and bluetcrest was tucked away in his den. erasmus supposed that they thought that, surely, he wouldn't risk leaving the camp with the coming storm that was just on the horizon, but it seemed that they underestimated just how desperate he was beginning to feel since juniperstorm came to highgarden and made a scene. it was never supposed to be that way, and he had braced himself for the immediate fallout. when nothing came, he eased into damage control. he kept an ear out and listened as the knights and roses began to take his side. indeed, why would this groveclan cat have the nerve to come into their clan to insult one of their own? if anything, they thought, it showed that groveclan was disillusioned and didn't understand their place. leave it to the softhearts to think they were morally better than highgarden, who had never gone out of their way to cross clear border markings. for a little while erasmus thought that silence on his part would be better, that it would be easier for the others to fill in the blanks if he didn't start an argument when there didn't need to be one. but then when the opportunity presented itself, he took the leap, and found that it was all the better for it. some cats still granted him slanted looks, but erasmus didn't concern himself with the queen or daydreaming knight. ferretwhisker didn't know anything beyond the nursery walls, and hornetshade was young and foolish. even if the highly-ranked knights and roses like hurricanejaw or mapleshadow didn't instantly believe him, that was fine. even before he was asked to tell his story, erasmus had formulated a plan that would clear everything up for good. no one would be asking him any more questions, and no one would believe groveclan ever again. even if his plan hadn't work the first time he met badgerstar and his clan, erasmus knew that he would succeed. tawnyrose and her court needed to be unseated, and erasmus could think of several groveclan cats who would be better off in the stars. so he bided his time and waited for his opening. thankfully he knew that merlinsong was spending more time in the nursery under the guise of keeping an eye on flickersky, and the shadows afforded him easy passage to the herbalists' den where spencer was curled up in his nest. for a moment, erasmus considered his mate's sleeping form, and he almost felt bad for waking him, but he had no other choice. "spencer," he mumbled quietly, mindful of the silence that had settled over the camp for the night. spencer stirred, and erasmus went to his side. "i'm sorry, but this is important. i need you to wake up now." "i'm awake," spencer murmured, but his eyes were still half-lidded, his voice groggy, and erasmus wanted nothing more in that moment than to pull him close and let him rest. but there were important matters that needed to be tended to first so that he could keep the smaller tom safe. at last, spencer righted himself and sat up in his nest. he blinked the sleep from his eyes slowly. "it's the middle of the night, what's going on?" "i'm being watched. have been for a while," erasmus said. when spencer's eyes went wide, erasmus shook his head dismissively. "the groveclan cat... she's making this into trouble. more trouble than we need right now." "are we leaving?" spencer asked, but erasmus shook him off again. "no, we can't. not in this weather. it won't be safe for you." spencer's mouth drew into a tight line, knowing, and erasmus breathed out a sigh. "and i fear that the queen would go to badgerstar instead. they'd hunt us down. we're staying, and i have a plan but... there's something i'm going to need you to do." spencer's ears pricked and he nodded without hesitation. erasmus hated that he would have to get involved, but his mate only needed to know his task - not the full plan. "it won't be for a little while, but when i give you the signal, you'll know what to do, okay?" by the time he had finished telling spencer his task and what he should be waiting for, the sky was already beginning to brighten with the first taste of dawn. he stuck to the shadows, the same way he came, but the first rays of light caught on his dark fur. in his rush back to his nest before the dawn patrol would begin to wake and gather, he didn't notice the daydreaming knight watching him from the other side of camp from where he had been guarding the camp, checking for any signs that something was amiss. pale eyes narrowed and he ducked back the way he had came, making sure that he hadn't been seen by the dark shadow.
just as they had been preparing for and as merlinsong had cautioned for moons, the blizzard finally came to highgarden hit with a vengeance, blanketing the territory in a thick layer of snow and sending the clan into their dens to wait it out. when the storm had finally passed and the cats were able to venture out into the open again, tawnyrose immediately tasked her knights and roses to begin clearing out the camp of snow while others sought out on hunting patrols to try and keep the clan stocked with prey. "tigergaze!" the shout rang across the camp, interrupting the cats at work as sunglow streaked through their progress, kicking up even more snow as he went, chasing after his friend. betonypetal called after him, indignant from the way he had messed up her work packing a mound of snow away from the nursery, but her eyes were bright with amusement when sunglow shouted again after tigergaze, who ducked down behind dippernose, who opted to step out of the way when sunglow shot forward, skidding to a halt with just enough room to send slow flying to splatter tigergaze. laughter followed as smokemane and obsidianwing poked their heads out of the den, watching the proceedings unfold, and iguanaspots squeezed past them with lyrewhistle at her side. it was only at betonypetal's searching glance that lyrewhistle grinned. "tigergaze dumped snow on sunglow's head to wake him up from his nap," she said, and smokemane stepped out of the den just in time to watch her brother drag tigergaze down into the snow while thet wrestled one another. "turns out that he didn't appreciate it very much," she said, turning to obsidianwing to grin at him. at that same moment, bluetcrest walked back, and his gaze tracked over sunglow's path and the snow that he had kicked up in his charge to catch tigergaze. just as betonypetal began to gather the scattered snow back together to remake her pile, bluetcrest raised to tail, calling her to still. "let it rest for a little bit," he said, glancing from the snow to the sun that shone overhead. "with any luck some of it'll melt. if not, we've already made a lot of progress together by making sure the dens were clear of it. take a rest, all of you," he said, looking around the rest of the camp. immediately, pythoneyes stopped where he was helping otterfur and maplelily with one pile, and instead he bounded over to bluetcrest. "you're done working us to death here?" he teased, and bluetcrest rolled his eyes, nudging his shoulder against pythoneyes'. "as if you even lifted a paw," bluetcrest shot back. however, before he could even react to the way pythoneyes grinned wickedly, the knight reared back on his hind legs, bringing his front paws down into a pile of snow so that it flew up into bluetcrest's face. the attendant spluttered, shaking the flakes out of his face just in time to see pythoneyes grin again at him. "i think i just lifted two paws," he said, and bluetcrest shook his head quickly. "you think you're very funny, don't you?" with his tail, pythoneyes led bluetcrest out of the middle of the clearing, towards a spot with less frost, and he diligently flicked snow from his shoulder. "actually, yes, i do." they were silent for a moment, with bluetcrest ridding himself of the snow with pythoneyes' help, before the knight spoke again. "that blizzard last night... i know it's silly, but i just kept thinking of when we met in that storm." "oh as if i could forget," bluetcrest said, matching his friend's smile. without hesitation, he shoulder'checked pythoneyes to send him down to the ground, and bluetcrest jumped on top of him, pinning him down. "when you all but threatened my life if i didn't tell you what happened to daisypaw and briarpaw." but pythoneyes merely laughed, his grin too big for his face, so full of joy. "i was scared! i didn't know what happened to them." he looked up at bluetcrest, but didn't fight him off, and it took the attendant a long moment before he stepped off of him, letting pythoneyes up. "besides, if we hadn't met, then i wouldn't have found them. i wouldn't be here now. and then where would you be?" "warmer," bluetcrest said, ducking his head to smooth down his wet chest fur. "less annoyed." "also a lot more bored." at that moment, a clump of snow flew through the air, followed by tigergaze's shout, but it was too late, and pythoneyes recoiled when he was struck. he turned to face the younger tom, who was covered with snow from nose to tail, and who grinned apologetically. "sorry! turns out i have bad aim!" tigergaze shouted. pythoneyes turned to look at bluetcrest, who was shaking with laughter. with that, pythoneyes stood and pushed at bluetcrest again, and with that they joined the fray of the snow fight. pythoneyes streaked past, and maplelily had to sidestep out of the way, bumping into newtmask at the same time. the long-furred gray tom looked at his former-mate with wide eyes before he cleared his throat. "hey," maplelily greeted him politely, and newtmask managed a tight smile. "i - uh - was actually coming to find you. i was wondering if we could talk," he said, glancing towards where their kits had joined their younger siblings. racoonslip let out a war cry when he charged at smokemane, and sunglow barely dodged a well-aimed shot from wolfhowl. "sure," maplelily said, and with a nod of her head they began to walk together, keeping towards the edge of the camp as they went, hopefully out of range of another snowball. "what is it you want to talk about?" she asked. "you, me, us... them," newtmask said after a beat, letting out a breathless laugh. "a lot of things, i suppose. i've just... been thinking a lot lately about the past and what used to be. and i realized that, for so long... i was so angry at you, and at hurricanejaw. no matter how much i told myself that it didn't matter, or that i didn't want it to matter... it did matter. but for a long time hurricanejaw was faceless in my mind. he was just the tom that you liked more -" "newtmask, -" maplelily began, but newtmask shot her a tight smile. "please, let me say this, okay? i need to say this." when maplelily nodded, newtmask ducked his head and continued: "and when he found us at the old tower, i felt even angrier. because he came in ready to save us all, like he was some hero, who came right when we needed him the most. and suddenly i thought that it all made sense. but then i met him more, we spoke and... as much as i want to be mad at him, i can't be. he didn't know, and i know that if he had... it probably wouldn't have played out the way it had. but i realized that i wasn't mad at you, either." at that, maplelily looked at newtmask, surprise clear in her eyes, but he didn't meet her gaze. "i think we were too young. i know that i didn't know what i wanted, and maybe you didn't either. i love our kits, and i'm so glad that we had them, because i can't imagine live without them in it but... i just wish i knew then everything i know now." finally, maplelily saw her opening and her stopped walking. when newtmask turned to face her, her smile was gentle. "i feel the same way. and i tried so many times to think of how i could apologize to you. because i loved you, and i loved hurricanejaw. and maybe i never stopped caring for him but... newtmask i chose you without even knowing anything about the world, or about love. and i hurt you, and i could never forgive myself for that. and you should know that i never stopped caring for you." there was a long pause before newtmask gathered his composure. "i fell in love with you moons ago, and i never fell out of love with you, maplelily," he admitted. he took a tentative step towards her, and maplelily swallowed thickly before meeting him halfway. "i can't tell you what you want to hear," she said when their noses were nearly touching. her voice was quiet, soft as a snowflake, and newtmask felt the tension that had been weighing his shoulders for so long melt away. "i just... need time to think. i'm still figuring out who i am, and i think i need to figure that out first." "you need to forgive yourself," newtmask whispered, and maplelily nodded. "when you're ready to say anything, even if you don't think i want to hear it... you'll know where to find me." they stood like that for a brief moment before a shout came from nearby, and rabbitpaw strode past, leaping nimbly over a pile of slush, stagpaw hot on her heels. "coming through!" stagpaw shouted, followed quickly by rabbitpaw's voice: "sorry aunt maplelily!" and the older highgarden cats watched the thorns give chase, seedpaw racing after them both. the trio nearly knocked into otterfur, but he quickly backed out of the way just in time, his eyes blown wide with surprise, and seedpaw shouted another apology in their wake. the brown tom watched them go for a moment before he ducked into the wilted's den to get out of the fray. it was dark inside the den, the snow blocking most of the passages to let light through, and otterfur was surprised to hear a pair of voices going back and forth from the far corner of the den. it was only when his eyes adjusted that he made out the outline of two cats sitting together, their heads low to speak, but their voices still carried in the quiet space. "- you said yourself that we can't trust him and that you don't know what she was saying -" one voice said, but the second one was a lower tone. "- that doesn't mean going all the way to groveclan!" the second voice said. for a moment, otterfur knew that he should leave before the cats noticed his presence, but he instantl recognized hornetshade and warblercry, and interest stayed his paws. "we don't know what they know." "they must know more than us." that was warblercry. "you said that juniperstorm won't let you get close to groveclan, but she doesn't know who i am. i can go, and maybe she'll hear me out long enough to say something." hornetshade was quiet, and otterfur held his breath. then: "i don't know what i saw. but it was him. he's planning something, he must be." already, thoughts were swirling in otterfur's mind, pressing insistently, and cold fear piercing him like icicles. before hornetshade could say anything else, otterfur cleared his throat, and the two young cats jumped, whirling around to face him. it was warblercry who recovered first. "were you eavesdropping?" she asked. "how much did you hear?" but it was hornetshade who stepped in front of warblercry, his eyes narrowed. "you didn't hear anything." at that, otterfur tipped his head. "you're worried about the clan. if you think we're in danger, tell me." when two pairs of eyes merely stared at him, otterfur took a step forward. "listen, i've seen one clan fall because of a leader who let power go to his head, and he didn't know what enough meant. don't make me see highgarden go through this too. are we in danger?" at last, hornetshade and warblercry exchanged a quick glance, and it was all the answer otterfur needed.
despite the piles of snow lying outside of the nursery, inside it was incredibly warm and peacefully still. where there was once was great action as flickersky had her kits, it lapsed into easy quiet as merlinsong sat back on his haunches and let the young queen gaze down at her kits. when softglow caught merlinsong's eye, he silently beckoned the herbalist over to the corner, where he settled among the moss. exhaustion from a day of making sure that flickersky and her kits were healthy had clearly taken its toll, but when softglow looked back to flickersky, there was only joy and love in her eyes. "congratulations flickersky," he murmured at last, breaking the silence that had settled, and flickersky shot him a brilliant smile, warmer than any of the others he had ever seen from her before. "they're lovely." before flickersky could say anything, however, hawthornkit raised his head from against his father's flank, where he and bramblekit had been resting for most of the evening. tawnyrose had taken it upon herself to take lightkit for the day and the night, softglow supposed to tell her more stories of the past and teach her more about what tawnyrose would called "how to be a queen." the very thought made softglow's stomach churn, that lightkit was only a few moons old, and yet she was already had such high expectations resting on her shoulders, but tawnyrose said that it wasn't common - that she had known even more than her daughter at that age, and she hadn't even been her mother's heir. and as much as softglow wished that he could argue, he found that tawnyrose had been more grating that usual, particularly when it came to lightkit, so he folded and turned his attention to hawthornkit and bramblekit, who basked in his attention that he gave while their mother favored their sister. "can i see them?" hawthornkit asked, already finding his paws. softglow immediately reached out a paw to pull him back, but flickersky grinned at the little tom and nodded. "you just have to be gentle and quiet, okay?" she said, leaning against ferretwhisker who had joined her friend and offered support the whole time. flickersky blinked gently at softglow, who watched as hawthornkit and bramblekit approached the pretty queen and her the kits nestled closely to her side. "they're very cute," bramblekit said, his voice breathy, as if trying to keep his voice hushed, and softglow and merlinsong shared an amused smile. "did you think of any names for them?" ferretwhisker asked, and flickersky hummed thoughtfully. "i did think of a few... since two of them will be going with stormshroud, i still want to have a part of him here, if that makes sense?" flickersky said, and there was a twinge of longing in her voice. without a doubt, she had wished that her mate could have been in highgarden for a visit, but it was understandable that the recent blizzard hadn't made it possible. even flickersky had commented that it was better to know that he was safe with his clan than wandering in the storm. "so i talked to yewbloom, tanagercall, and bluetcrest. i figured that they might know different types of storms. so even if stormshroud isn't here with us, they'll still have a little reminder of their father." flickersky swallowed thickly, and ferretwhisker pressed her nose to her friend's shoulder to comfort her. "she's going to be tsunamikit, and she'll be tornadokit," flickersky said when she had regained her voice, touching her nose gently first to the white molly, and then to one of the calico kittens. "and i quite like the name cirruskit for him," she said when her glance flicked to one of her sons. the smile on her face was easy, warm, and it turned on hawthornkit when the little tabby tom leaned closer for a better look at his new denmates. "what's a cirrus?" he asked. "bluetcrest said it was a type of cloud," flickersky supplied, and hawthornkit's brow furrowed as he considered this, but bramblekit beat him to it. "but you said storms -" bramblekit began, but hawthornkit brightened in that moment and grinned. "it's both of you," hawthornkit concluded, looking back to softglow and merlinsong who watched the little tom wave his tail excitedly. "storms come with clouds, right? and clouds are also in the sky. it's flickersky and stormshroud." with that, he bounded back over to softglow, bramblekit hot on his heels, and they bundled easily into the moss of their nest. "you're both very clever," softglow said to them, nuzzling them gently before wrapping his tail around them. to flickersky, he smiled warmly. "i think those are great names. beautiful names for your beautiful kits." "thank you," flickersky said with a soft smile of her own. for a moment, he considered her kits before glancing around to softglow, merlinsong, and ferretwhisker. "i just wish that he could have been here to meet them immediately," she said, and the same tone of longing seeped into her words. "i wish that he could be with us all, always." "he'll always be with you," ferretwhisker promised, coaxing flickersky. "he loves you, and you love him. and you both love your kits. and for when he can't be physically present, we'll be here to help you the rest of the way." "for anything you need," softglow added, and merlinsong nodded his agreement. "all of us, we're all here for one another. we're a family." and flickersky let one of his paws stretch out in softglow's direction, and the king did the same. neither of them could move to meet, but ferretwhisker leaned her cheek against flickersky's, and merlinsong grinned. and it was enough for the moment to be together, in the warmth, with the kits around them, safe and sound.
"i want out," sagecloud told him when she caught the queen's attendant alone after he finished organizing the patrols for the afternoon. for a long moment, bluetcrest blinked at sagecloud, his yellow eyes widened, before he sniffed and turned away. "that's not how this works," he said simply, but she rounded him, stepping into his path to make him pull up short, unable to avoid her. bluetcrest sighed, his shoulders sagging, before he shook his head again. "sagecloud -" he began, his tone empathetic, but she merely leveled him with a sharp gaze. "i said i want out," she interrupted him, not letting bluetcrest have the chance to finish. "i didn't ask for this, and i'm not going to tell anyone, but i can't keep living like this. i just want to go on patrols and be able to see brindlepelt. i'm not your spy anymore -" this time bluetcrest quieted her with a pointed hiss. "not here," he said, hushing sagecloud, but she went with him without any further fight. together, they ducked into the unused wilted's den, and bluetcrest shook his head when it was clear that they were alone. sagecloud let him pace to compose himself, while she settled, sitting on the ground with his tail arranged neatly over her paws. at last, he looked back to sagecloud, who tipped her chin at him. "you can't just say things like that out loud," he said, and sagecloud balked at him. "you're acting as if he doesn't already know," she shot back. bluetcrest, however, didn't flinch, but instead padded forward to meet her. sagecloud squared her shoulders, ready for another argument, but bluetcrest's tone was softer when he spoke next. "i know you didn't ask for this but... we need you right now. it's a tough balance, but we're figuring out what to do with him." "he's lying to the whole clan," sagecloud said. "he told all of the knights and roses that he's a victim, and that he had no part in killing that kit, and they're believing him. i mean, why shouldn't they? they're being fed lies from every angle. you're lying to them too, keeping them in the dark when there's a murderer walking among them, like he's one of them. and i think it's a question of who's worse - him for lying about who he is, or you for never telling the truth of who exactly we're sharing a den with?" these were the thoughts that had been running through sagecloud's head for moons, and since erasmus caught her eye in the den that night, she felt tired, restless, like she had to run until her muscles gave out. "and you say that you're figuring it out. why is he still here?" "because tawnyrose won't exile him," bluetcrest admitted, blowing out a long breath that he hadn't realized he had been holding. "softglow and i want him out, but tawnyrose thinks she has him on a leash. so, please, sagecloud, just carry on. let us talk to her, we want him gone just as much as you do. do it so you can know our friends are safe." though sagecloud's expression was pinched, bluetcrest caught the hesitation, the wavering in her self-assurance, and he knew that she would agree with him. sure enough, sagecloud stood and began towards the entrance of the den. "i wish i had come at any other time," she said over her shoulder to him. "because that would have meant that i never heard the truth of what he really was. and i think we're all fools to think we can keep a monster tied down."
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Sept 12, 2020 10:10:09 GMT -8
highgarden, for all it was worth, was no stranger to more extreme weather. floods and storms battered the valley time and time again, from extreme rainfall, to mountains of snow. it wasn't the first time there was a blizzard, and it wasn't the first time that a patrol was caught in a storm. it wasn't the first time that many members of the clan remained gathered, huddled together in their dens, waiting for the last patrol to make their way back to camp so that all could be accounted for. while tawnyrose and softglow waited in the queen's den, merlinsong's pale green eyes flashed from across the way, where he was standing in the shadows of the herbalists' den. there was a pit in softglow's stomach, the sinking feeling that something was wrong, but it surprised him when tawnyrose spoke first, breaking the silence that had settled between them. "i shouldn't have let him go on patrol without me," she said, and softglow shot her a sideways glance. "the kits still need you here, and it's not like bluetcrest is alone this time," softglow said, attempting to soothe the queen's nerves. but the pit in settled in his chest told softglow that the weather was worse than it had been in seasons, and he knew that the patrol should have returned already. they had been gone too long, and he swallowed thickly. "they'll be back soon," he heard himself say, though it seemed that the winds were only picking up further. as the storm progressed, flakes falling thicker across the camp, softglow kept his eyes trained on the camp entrance, aware of tawnyrose at his shoulder and merlinsong watching from across the camp. in that moment, time seemed to slow, the clearing grew infinitely wider, and softglow wished, for once, that they might be allowed a moment of solace. there was no telling exactly how much time passed, but softglow finally heard a shout from outside of the camp, carried faintly on the wind. he reacted quickly, but merlinsong was faster, a dark shadow flying from his den just as softglow spotted ayalla racing into the clearing. there was no missing the distinct intake of breath from tawnyrose when bluetcrest and the others weren't immediately behind the slight molly. by the time softglow and tawnyrose reached merlinsong, the herbalist's expression had turned taunt, and ayalla was babbling frantically: "i didn't - i didn't see it happen, but there was blood, and, and -" she cut off long enough to let out a choked noise. her eyes were blown wide, and she turned to tawnyrose when the queen shouldered past softglow to reach the rose. "who?" she asked, curt and sharp. ayalla shuddered, and softglow braced himself to cut tawnyrose off before she could say anything further, but the queen could not be stopped so easily. "ayalla, what happened? who's hurt?" tawnyrose demanded, and this time ayalla found her voice. "smokemane," she said, letting out another choked squeak as realization set in. "we came across two loners in the blizzard and that's why we were out so long, and we must have gotten turned around on the way back. i think she fell, or slipped, or something hit her head but - but then -" "inside the den," merlinsong ordered at last, slipping between ayalla and tawnyrose, effectively ending the interrogation. he shouted for spencer, and another shout echoed back, preceding when spencer's angled face poked out of the den. quickly, the small tom ushered ayalla into the den from the cold, and merlinsong's eyes cut sharply back to tawnyrose. "she's in shock, this isn't the time to be harsh with her," he said, but tawnyrose's attention was drawn to where the entrance shook again, and this time it was iguanaspots and warblercry who came through, a pair of strangers with them. at last, bluetcrest and betonypetal made their way into the camp, smokemane's body drawn over their shoulders as they carried her. one of the strangers, a golden tom, pressed against betonypetal when she wavered, steadying her. merlinsong rushed forward to meet the patrol, exchanging a few brief words with bluetcrest before leading them past tawnyrose and softglow to follow ayalla. only the two strangers lingered, and tawnyrose tipped her head at them. "do you know where you are?" tawnyrose asked them, and the golden tom managed a grimace. "we didn't have much time for introductions out there, i'm afraid," he said, and tawnyrose sniffed absently. "you're in highgarden. if bluetcrest brought you here, you must have heard of our clan a little bit." "you're the leader here," that was the second, darker tom with sharp green eyes. his expression was somber, but he didn't look anywhere near as upset the golden tom was. if anything, softglow thought, he looked rather unbothered by everything around him, as if the blizzard and smokemane's absence was of no consequence. "leopardsun here is convinced that we could use a clan as our home." "and you?" tawnyrose asked stiffly. the dark tom shrugged. "we stay together. it'd be nice to not be so cold." before either of them could say anything further, pale green eyes flashed at the edge of softglow's peripherals, and merlinsong emerged from his den again. he looked to softglow, and the king didn't miss the worry on his features. "i think it'd be a good idea to get maplelily, newtmask, and sunglow," he murmured quietly, and softglow, by some grace of the gods, felt surprisingly steady on his paws. he swung his gaze towards the two strangers. "i'll show you a den where you can meet other members of the clan. you must be cold and tired. please, follow me." without waiting for their reply, or for tawnyrose to say anything, softglow padded away. it was only when the golden tom, leopardsun, padded at his shoulder, that softglow was sure that he was being followed. "daystrike - he's just a little bristly, but he's not bad," leopardsun said, and softglow merely flicked his ear, noncommittal. "that molly... is she going to be okay?" finally, softglow looked to the stranger. "merlinsong and spencer are gifted at what they do. smokemane is in the best paws we can get right now." leopardsun seemed to take this is stride, understanding the lack of a promise. his expression tightened, and softglow nodded them towards the den saved for the knights and roses. he ducked his head inside, where several pairs of eyes turned towards him, all worried and searching for their missing clanmates. he could feel the curiosity rise even further when they spotted leopardsun and daystrike, and softglow nodded towards hurricanejaw. "the patrol found these two. can you make sure they can settle somewhere?" he asked, and the senior knight didn't hesitate, gesturing the pair forward. leopardsun went easily, though his friend appeared to assess the rest of the den first before following suit. to the searching glances, softglow managed to swallow around the lump in his throat. "the patrol came back," he said, though he knew that it was not the message they wanted. their friends weren't yet in their spaces in the den, and anxiety hit him like a wall. riverfoam exchanged quick words were tanagercall and kitechaser, and hornetshade shifted uncomfortably in his nest. but it was maplelily who met his gaze without flinching, and when softglow tipped his chin to her, she merely leaned towards newtmask. softglow ducked out the way he came, and didn't wait for them to follow him, but instead he decided to give them a moment. outside, the clearing was empty, and a path of pawsteps traced tawnyrose's route back to her den. for a moment, softglow considered going directly to merlinsong, or to follow tawnyrose, but his paws took him instead to the nursery. it was warm inside, but not without the same touch of worry. even the kits didn't appear immune to the effects, and softglow breathed out in surprise when his sons jumped at his side, and softglow looked from hawthornkit and bramblekit to ferretwhisker and flickersky, who let out warm purrs. "they were asking if you were going to visit them," ferretwhisker said as the king greeted the kits. lightkit padded forward to greet him as well, lifting her nose to touch his, and softglow nuzzled her gently. then he looked back to ferretwhisker, who gazed at him quizzically, the question hanging unspoken above their heads. "the patrol's back," he said, but his words did not visibly soothe either queen. taking another moment to gather himself, softglow pressed his nose to hawthornkit's cheek. "smokemane... she's with merlinsong now. the others are in shock, it seems." flickersky let out a gentle gasp, but ferretwhisker's presence was steadying, oddly calm though pain lit her eyes as well. "she's strong, and merlinsong... he'll take care of her," the queen said, resting her chin atop elkkit's flank while her son slept. only quillkit was awake, and the tabby tom helped lightkit back into her nest. "like i've been taking care of lightkit," quillkit said, curling around his friend. lightkit reclined comfortably in the nest, letting out a quiet yawn, while quillkit met softglow's gaze. "i'm keeping my promise." "there's no one who could do more than you, quillkit. thank you," softglow said, and the little tom seemed to take pride in this. to hawthornkit and bramblekit, softglow lowered his voice. "i need you to stay with ferretwhisker and flickersky, okay? i'll come back when i can, but i need you to help them make sure everyone stays safe here, alright?" he asked, and the pair nodded quickly. "i'll fight the snow if i have to," hawthornkit stated, and bramblekit puffed out his chest. "good, i'll be back soon," softglow promised. with that, he left the nursery and made his way back to the herbalists' den. already, it seemed that merlinsong had cleared most of the patrol, though bluetcrest remained, sitting ad staring at the floor while ayalla and iguanaspots leaned on one another. spencer was putting herbs back in the stores, and merlinsong was speaking quietly to newtmask and maplelily. sunglow dared to approach his sister, though he hung back, as if afraid to touch. when softglow padded closer, he saw that blood had dried in smokemane's long fur, and her eyes were closed. the only signs of life came from the shallow movement of her flank. merlinsong touched his nose to maplelily's after a final word, then left them the family to round to softglow. there was a long moment of silence before softglow glanced once more to smokemane. "how is she?" he asked quietly, and merlinsong drew his tail over his paws. "hard to tell until she wakes up." the if hung between them, unspoken but present nonetheless, and softglow felt his chest tighten again. "we're doing what we can," he added, and softglow leaned his head on merlinsong's shoulder. "if there's anything you need, let me know." "if i knew what we needed, then i'd tell you," merlinsong replied, and together they sat and watched smokemane's family wait and mourn and hope for the gods to spare their own.
wolverinesnap didn't remember much more than the searing pain that ran through his veins, pounding loudly in his ears to the tune of his rapid heartbeat. he felt the slice of anger, of the taste of blood on his tongue, and of pain, of pain, of pain. there was the pulse of red haze behind his eyelids, which slowly faded to dark, leaving wolverinesnap with the ache of exhaustion that settled deep in his bones. by the time he finally came back to himself, when he could feel the chill on the air and the brush of ground underneath his body, there was no telling how much time had passed. he was used to the dizziness that came after a spell, when the curse had finally run itself through his body and he was able to take in the world around him. slowly, slowly, with a sluggish slowness, he blinked his eyes open to take in the long shadows and gray walls of the space around him. then he saw the clump of what he easily recognized as his own fur, and he felt the chill hit his chin, where his skin was exposed. the ground was hard, but there was no mistaking the claw marks in stone, and the way moss from a nest had been overturned, as if during a struggle. and it was only then that wolverinesnap noticed the form staring at him from the corner of the space, green eyes reflecting the sparse moonlight that was afforded through the slightest gaps in the walls. they were the eyes that had drawn wolverinesnap in moons earlier the first time they met, the eyes that had been so warm and friendly as two wayward travelers who didn't know where there paws were going to lead them. the pang settled low in wolverinesnap's chest, with the constant fear as the seasons changed and the wind shifted from warm to cold, the yewbloom's eyes would change to become cold as well. but, even now, yewbloom didn't appear angry, or upset. he looked tired, but his eyes retained the same warmth that wolverinesnap needed, and a shiver ran through his body from the cold sinking into his skin where his fur had fallen away. he tried to sit up, but his muscles ached, and he slumped back among the scraped together moss. yewbloom's eyes didn't leave him for a moment, and it was only when wolverinesnap spoke that yewbloom straightened up. "i'm sorry," he choked out, and the words wobbled on the edge of a sob that broke as soon as he heard the exhaustion that lined yewbloom's voice. "oh, honey," yewbloom cooed, and wolverinesnap reveled in the brush of warm fur against his own. wolverinesnap sobbed into his friend's shoulder, and yewbloom held him close, his nose tucked into the crook of wolverinesnap's neck. "you're back, it's you," he said, and wolverinesnap sobbed again. it took time, but it was when the sobs softened into gentle cries, then minute sniffles, that yewbloom pulled back long enough to look at wolverinesnap, and the bicolor drowned in the soft warmth of his eyes. "you're back," yewbloom said again. "i didn't - i was worried that you -" "i'm here," wolverinesnap sniffed with a slight shake of his head. "i... it's a long story but... leafbare does that to me. every season cycle i... i got lost. i'm sorry, but i'm back now if the weather has changed." there was too much to explain in that moment, and yewbloom seemed to accept it for the moment. still, the prince seemed to wait for wolverinesnap to say something further, so he cleared his throat. "i... i don't know how long i was gone for." he didn't recognize where they were, but no other scents caught in the air. it seemed that he and yewbloom were completely alone, and wolverinesnap wasn't yet sure if it was a good sign - he couldn't tell if he had been taken before he had hurt someone, or if he had been taken before he hurt someone. all the same, yewbloom took it in stride, finding his cue. "you were on patrol with riversnap, who came back when she said that you were acting a little strange. she said that you lost focus a lot, and you weren't responding by the time you got back to camp. tulipstream said that you had lost fur, that she saw clumps of it in your nest." yewbloom paused for a moment, and wolverinesnap looked back onto himself, where the pink of his skin showed plainly where he had lost so much of his fur. at that, he sighed, and yewbloom's jaw rested against the top of his head. "merlinsong started to check to see if you were sick but then you... there was this look in your eyes, and i knew... it wasn't you, wolverinesnap. there was something else, but it wasn't you." wolverinesnap felt yewbloom shudder against him, and he offered only a quiet hum as assurance that he was still there. "you looked like a wild animal and... adenium was helping merlinsong and spencer, and you..." at that, at last, yewbloom stopped short. there was a long beat of silence before yewbloom spoke again, his voice thicker. "hurricanejaw and i managed to get you here. when the seasons change and spring comes, this is where highgarden comes to get away from the spots that flood. i knew it would be secure, and at least no one would be here for a while. that was a few days ago." wolverinesnap shut his eyes tightly and shook his head slightly, as if he could shake off the time spent clearly struggling against yewbloom, almost attacking an innocent kit. all of it made his shoulders feel heavy, but he managed to look up at yewbloom again. "is tawnyrose going to send me away?" he asked, blunt and to the point. it took a moment for the question to process, but yewbloom's eyes widened comically and his jaw fell open. "of course not," he said, swishing his tail against the smooth ground. "even if she wanted to - and she doesn't - i wouldn't let her. you didn't do anything wrong." "not this time," wolverinesnap pointed out, feeling more lucid than he had in a long time. with each moment, the world came into sharper focus and the red fog was pushed further to the edges of his peripherals. "but next time i could. next time i could hurt adenium, or one of the other kits. i could have hurt lightkit," wolverinesnap said, but yewbloom's expression remained unmoved, set into a practiced reserve. "i could have hurt you." "no, you wouldn't," yewbloom said. wolverinesnap furrowed his brow, his argument on the tip of his tongue, but yewbloom shushed him. "you said it yourself. it's not you. you wouldn't hurt lightkit, or adenium, or me. i know you, and i trust you. you wouldn't hurt me. i wouldn't let tawnyrose exile you for something that you didn't do." for a moment, wolverinesnap could only stare at yewbloom, his heart in his throat and his tongue tied. "it is me, and it isn't me. you don't know what i'm capable of," he said at last, but yewbloom didn't answer that. instead, the ginger prince rolled onto his back, staring up at the blank ceiling. "when i was younger, i thought i knew everything. i thought i knew who i was, and i thought i knew my place in the world. i was yewbloom, youngest prince of highgarden, brother to the queen's heir, youngest kit of queen lightrose and king tallstep. i thought i knew what those words meant," yewbloom said, and wolverinesnap settled at his side, resting his chin on his paws while he watched yewbloom. "i thought i knew exactly how my life was going to play out. i was going to lead a few hunting patrols, maybe mentor a thorn or two. i was going to be there at my mother's side when she died, and i was going to cheer for lighteyes when she became queen. i thought that everything worth knowing could be found in highgarden, even if i liked the idea of venturing out. but you know what i learned?" "knowing you, you're about to say something extremely heartfelt," wolverinesnap answered, managing the slightest slip of humor in the moment, which earned a smile from yewbloom. "i learned that my titles, my position, all of the mantras and sayings, my name.... i learned that all of it was just smoke. it means nothing when it stands on nothing. i don't know the future, and i don't know anywhere near as much as i think i do. no, i don't know what you're capable of, and i don't know what's hiding in the shadows or what will happen tomorrow. but i think i know who i am, and i think i know who you are. and i know that you wouldn't hurt me, not you." wolverinesnap's breath was lodged in his throat, trapped. but he finally managed a tight smile. "by gods, i hope you're right."
"i don't think this is a good idea," hornetshade said as they stood on the groveclan border. his eyes flicked back and forth between groveclan's territory and warblercry. there was a determined flicker in her eyes that he had never seen in his friend before. "you shouldn't be going alone. what if juniperstorm told badgerstar that erasmus is here? you really think that groveclan will let you go?" warblercry sighed and shook her head. "and you think it'd be better if you went with me? when juniperstorm threatened what she'd do if she saw you on groveclan territory?" at that, hornetshade ducked his head and scuffed his forepaw against the ground. warblercry felt a flash of sympathy for her best friend, but it was too late. her mind had been made up. "besides, i need someone to know where i am. if anything happens, you know groveclan better than anyone else in highgarden. i need you to have my back from here." "otterfur knows, too," hornetshade tried to argue, though it was clear he was losing steam. they had gone back and forth on the issue for days. while they both agreed that they couldn't trust erasmus, and that they wanted to know what he could possibly be planning in highgarden, they differed on how to go about the next action. where warblercry thought it would be best to go directly to the source to speak to juniperstorm, hornetshade was clearly still upset by the last time he had seen the groveclan warrior. when warblercry suggested going in his stead, he was quick to object, but the longer she thought about it, the more sense it made. juniperstorm said that hornetshade couldn't go to groveclan, but juniperstorm didn't know who warblercy was; warblercry hadn't been barred from groveclan in the way hornetshade had been. if they were to ever get answers, this was what they had to do. "otterfur's busy, and i need to do this. after smokemane... i can't get the image of her bleeding on the ground out of my mind. if he's up to something, i don't want to think of who could be hurt next, and next time we might not be so lucky. i need to do this..." warblercry said, looking down at her paws for a moment before she had regained her composure and could look to hornetshade again. "better we keep this as small as possible, right now, so he doesn't start to pick up on anything. we have to play this right." again, hornetshade gazed off into the distance, over the border, and warblercry knew she had won. "best case scenario, juniperstorm hasn't told anyone, she'll be hunting alone, and she'll be willing to talk." "worst case scenario, she's told everyone and will be on a full patrol with warriors ready to attack highgarden this moment," hornetshade mused. when warblercry rolled her eyes, hornetshade leaned forward to touch his nose to her cheek. "just... please be careful, for me. i don't know what i'll do if anything happens to you." "i'll be okay," warblercry promised, reveling in the warmth of her friend's fur before backing away from hornetshade. "i'll be back." "i'll be waiting for you," hornetshade said, staying at the edge of the border while warblercry struck out. highgarden was known to stay primarily to their own. few cats had relationships beyond the border, and even fewer crossed the borders often. they were a clan who stuck mainly to their own, and the first step out of highgarden territory felt like wading across an endless river. but the second step was easier, as was the third, and on and on. within a matter of moments, warblercry left the familiar highgarden border behind and hornetshade was out of sight. instead, she took in the lush growth of groveclan. in comparison to highgarden, groveclan's territory was densely packed with trees where highgarden's land saw dotting of trees to break up the fields and slopes. when warblercry reached a river, she walked along the steep riverbank, following its path, stopping over every so often to take in scents to hope to find the one warrior she was looking for. by chance, warblercry finally found a calico pelt through the trees, and she opened her mouth to take in the scent that had lingered in the air of highgarden's camp the day juniperstorm visited. soft grass rustled under warblercry's paws, and just as the little tabby went to make her presence known, the groveclan warrior turned to face her through the trees. but, in that moment, another voice sounded out as well, and warblercry felt her blood run cold. "juniperstorm," the voice said, distinctly male and decidedly not juniperstorm. "do you smell that? what's highgarden scent doing this far over the border?" through the foliage, warblercry's eyes locked with juniperstorm's, and there was a beat of silence before warblercry knew that she had been wrong. she made a grave mistake. she turned, whipping around on her heels to run back the way she had come, and she sprinted, well-aware of the tom's surprised shout, as ell as juniperstorm's answer. warblercry was quick on her paws, agile, but she was in unfamiliar territory, and she wasn't used to the trees choked around her. it was only too easy for the groveclan warriors to catch up to her, and warblercy was cut-off by juniperstorm when the other molly blocked her path, and a black and white tom came up behind warblercry. "i -" warblercry started, but her words failed her. her muscles were bunched and her breath caught in her throat, but juniperstorm looked past warbercry to her clanmate. "it's fine, archie," juniperstorm was saying, sounding breathless as well, her words uncertain and shaky. it took warblercry a long moment to understand what she was saying. "she's a friend of mine, i just didn't want anyone to know. i -" "i thought highgarden cats didn't leave their territory," the tom, archie, said in response, clearly skeptical of juniperstorm's words. but it wasn't his questioning, or juniperstorm's excuses, that made warblercry freeze. when archie spoke, he took a step closer, and his scent caught the air, wafting closer to warblercry's nose and instantly knew what it was. "you smell like him," warblercry said quietly, but it was enough to silence the conversation between the groveclan warriors. when neither of them said anything, warblercry cleared her throat and looked towards archie. "you have the same scent as him. it's... changed a bit. but i recognize it, you smell like -" "don't say his name here," juniperstorm said, cutting warblercry off. the highgarden molly flicked her ear in acknowledgement. "who are you? what do you want?" warblercry drew in a breath and squared her shoulders. "i'm warblercry, and i'm one of hornetshade's friends. ever since you came to highgarden, he's been trying to understand what you were saying and... well, we're concerned that he's planning something." "he..." archie echoed, taking a step back from warblercry, while juniperstorm frowned. "he's in highgarden." when warblercry nodded, archie's eyes closed tightly and he took another step back, away from her, as if it would make the situation any less real. "he's highgarden's problem, then," juniperstorm said, but there was no mistaking the anger in her voice and the spark that lit her eyes. warblercry swished her tail. "you don't understand," she said. "ever since you came to us, he's been turning highgarden against groveclan. he said that you were out of line for blaming him for crimes he didn't commit, he said that groveclan is selfish and believes that you can control us. he said that he never did anything wrong and... and some cats believe him. they don't have any reason to think otherwise. they don't know better." her eyes flicked between juniperstorm, who bristled, and archie, who kept shaking his head. "please... i need to know about him, about what he's capable of. you were at the battle, and you... you smell like him... he's going to ruin the peace between our clans, and i need to know what he's capable of." "and you think you can stop him?" archie asked, his voice wobbling as he bordered on hysterical. warblercry steeled herself, planting her paws firmly on the ground. "i need to try. someone needs to try. he can't destroy highgarden. he can't hurt groveclan. he can't." she looked to juniperstorm first. "why did you hiss at him?" "he killed my sister," juniperstorm said after a moment. "when we were just kits, we were taken from our mother. when our father came with a patrol to rescue us, she was killed, for no reason. dante killed her but... erasmus planned for it to happen. it was always erasmus who wanted to kill us all." "he drove my sister out," archie said. "and he told the rest of us that groveclan stole her, and that was why we stole badgerstar's kits. because we needed to get revenge on groveclan. but it was all a lie. groveclan never stole anyone, erasmus just wanted to start a war. he's always been manipulating us all." archie sounded exhausted, but warblercry forced herself to nod along as juniperstorm and archie told their stories. they were tales of monsters and dark shadows, stories of blood and pain, stories of the past and stories of what could come in the future. by the time warblercry left the groveclan warriors and found hornetshade waiting where she had left him, she felt dull. the sun was sinking low in the sky, and she leaned heavily against her best friend's shoulder. "are you okay? did you find juniperstorm?" he asked, and warblercry nodded. slowly, she turned her head to rest her nose against hornetshade's neck, and she breathed in his familiar scent. "we need to get back to camp," she murmured. "we... we're in a lot of trouble."
when softglow found merlinsong, his friend was hunched over a pile of herbs, and he didn't react when the king called his name. without a doubt, the past moon had been busy, and highgarden saw its fair share of troubles. maplelily and sunglow barely left the herbalists' den, not wanting to leave smokemane's side, and merlinsong moved flickersky from the nursery when she said that her kits had started coughing. the young root nodded politely to softglow when he caught her eye, before she went back to grooming tornadokit's fur. cirruskit turned over in his sleep, restless while he let out a coughing fit, and flickersky was quick to hush him, gentle and soothing. from the other side of the den, maplelily was resting, though sunglow was talking quietly to smokemane. the injured rose had taken some time to wake up after bluetcrest brought her back to camp, and it was clear that she was still finding some difficulty in moving and following conversations, though merlinsong and spencer had agreed that it was a good sign that she was awake at all. when sunglow murmured something quietly to her, smokemane let out a quiet laugh. though it was delayed, softglow was happy to take it as a good sign, for the time being. "merlinsong," softglow said again, turning his attention back to merlinsong, who still faced away from him. it was only when he reached forward, touching his nose to merlinsong's shoulder, that the herbalist turned on his heels, whipping around to meet softglow's surprised gaze. in the moment, softglow searched merlinsong's eyes and was immediately taken aback by how tired his friend appeared. his normally-pale green eyes were dull, lacking their usual luster. even his voice was tired when he leaned forward to look at softglow better. "you're not hurt or sick, are you?" merlinsong asked, and softglow shook his head. "the kits?" he asked, with a little less urgency, and softglow shook his head again. "no, no, we're all fine," he answered, and the tension bled from merlinsong's shoulders. "is there something i can help you with, then?" merlinsong asked. his tone wasn't unkind, but it was clear how tired he was in the moment. he sniffled once and let out a cough, and softglow's shoulders sagged at the sound. "when's the last time you slept?" he asked instead, and merlisong managed a tight, strained smile. "i have a feeling you wouldn't like the answer to that," the herbalist said. merlinsong shot a glance towards smokemane and sunglow, then to flickersky. "i've had adenium and spencer waking me up from naps every now and then. i need to make sure that smokemane is alright, and to make sure that the cats on patrols aren't being overworked, and that the cold from flickersky's kits didn't spread, and -" "i get it," softglow cut him off with a shake of his head. "but this isn't healthy for you. what'll we do if you wind up with a cough? that won't stop the patrols from pushing too far, or help the kits or smokemane. you need to take a rest. my den is quieter than here," softglow said. when merlinsong opened his mouth to argue, softglow waved his tail. "no, no, that's not me telling you to sleep. it's an order from your king, so you have to pay heed." then, softglow leaned forward to touch his nose to merlinsong's shoulder. "you can go to my den, and i'll find spencer to look after the others." he stepped back and raised his voice so that the others in the den would be able to hear him. "and i'm sure that, if anything comes up, sunglow will come running to wake you up." the lithe knight raised his head at the sound of his name, and his whiskers twitched in amusement. "don't worry, i have no quarrel with waking you up for something important," sunglow added, earning a quiet purr from smokemane. with that, softglow turned back to merlinsong. "see? and spencer can handle the rest while you take a nap. go on, then," softglow urged, nudging merlinsong's shoulder until the bigger tom finally relented, shooting his patients one last look before he went. at the entrance of the den, softglow gave merlinsong one more push in the direction of his own den. "i'll go find spencer, you go get comfortable," he urged, not waiting for a response before he bounded away to find the other herbalist. it didn't come as a surprise that spencer was with erasmus, the pair talking with their heads close together, whispering back and forth. upon softglow's approach, they broke apart, and erasmus put the majority of his bulk between spencer and softglow. the king didn't offer the dark knight much more than a cursory glance, and spencer peered around erasmus. "merlinsong needs to go get some rest," softglow said, aiming the words towards spencer, who straightened up and slowly detached himself from erasmus' side. the skinny herbalist had a wide-eyed, shocked look, but softglow allowed it to slip past, focused on merlinsong instead. "i told sunglow to come running to get merlinsong if anything changes, but you should be with them, just in case. i think merlinsong might have already caught a cold, and it doesn't need to get any worse by pushing himself this hard for so long." softglow glanced up at erasmus for just a moment, before spencer nodded eagerly and began to pad in the direction of the herbalists' den. "of course. i'll check on everything, and have adenium bring feverfew to him later, just in case." there was a strange sense of urgency in spencer's step as he left softglow and erasmus in the dust. when erasmus didn't immediately go after spencer, softglow sniffed. "not like you to not be his shadow," he commented, and erasmus finally shifted. his lip curled as he sneered down at softglow. "speak for yourself. merlinsong is in your den and you're lingering here. not like you to keep him waiting, little king." with that, erasmus huffed a laugh as he rose and followed spencer. softglow watched him leave until he went into the den, out of sight. his blood felt chilled in his veins, but he shook his pelt out and turned to his own den to check on merlinsong.
tawnyrose watched through half-lidded eyes as the highgarden cats emerged from their dens. it had been a long moon for the whole clan, and the queen's heart felt heavy when she looked down at them all. there was no explaining the anxiety that rose from deep in her chest, settling in her paws like the heaviest of stones. they had been fortunate not to lose any of their clanmates, though smokemane's absence was felt. obsidianwing and sunglow leaned on one another, and maplelily's younger kits sent several glances towards the herbalists' den. merlinsong said that they had had done all they could, and now it was a matter of letting the young molly rest and heal as much as possible. tawnyrose watched bluetcrest weave through the crowd, lingering a little longer at pythoneyes' side before he disengaged and joined tawnyrose. from her side, lightkit bounded forward to greet her mother's best friend, and the queen's attendant purred when their noses touched. however, it was a voice from tawnyrose's other side that stole lightkit's attention. "how fares the little queen, then?" at the sound of yewbloom's voice, lightkit pulled away from bluetcrest and bounded over to her uncle. yewbloom's shoulders shook from the strength of his laughter, and tawnyrose caught wolverinesnap's eye from over yewbloom's back. the lithe knight flashed a small, tentative smile, and tawnyrose nodded her greeting towards him. "i didn't think you were coming back today," lightkit said, mirroring yewbloom's lopsided grin. "did you really think i'd miss this big day? no way," yewbloom said. he rested his chin on top of lightkit's head for a moment before tawnyrose stepped forward to meet him. "today's the big day, after all, i wouldn't have missed it for the world." tawnyrose rolled her eyes and flicked her tail absently. "you were almost late." at that, yewbloom let out a warm laugh and glanced towards wolverinesnap. "key word, sister: almost. i'm here, right on time." he brushed his nose against tawnyrose's cheek before pulling back and directing his attention to lightkit just as bluetcrest came up behind tawnyrose. "good luck, little queen, and have fun. later, if it's not too late and your mother let's you, i can tell you another story." at last, yewbloom waved his tail dismissively, brushing past wolverinesnap. the pair walked off, and tawnyrose tipped her chin expectantly to bluetcrest. "now that the prince has arrived, we're all ready to go." as if on cue, softglow appeared while bluetcrest was speaking, dipping his head politely to tawnyrose and lightkit. bluetcrest flashed a smile. "we should get this started, before the sun sets completely and we're holding a ceremony in the dark." "and what a shame that would be," tawnyrose said. bluetcrest flicked his ear before he went with softglow to the middle of the hollow. at the same time, tawnyrose gestured to lightkit. together, the padded up the slope of the queen's den, where they could look down at the rest of the clan. for a moment, tawnyrose allowed for silence as her daughter, the heir to the clan, looked down at the clan, who beheld her in turn. lightkit's eyes were bright, and she gripped the stone under her paws, as if to ground herself. her jaw dropped for just a moment before she remembered the lessons tawnyrose had been passing down onto her, and her expression was quick to settle back into a gentle smile. in turn, several cheers went up from the clan at the sight of their heir. from the moment it had been revealed that tawnyrose had been expecting kits, the clan had been waiting to meet their future queen. it would be moons until tawnyrose died or had to step down, but already it was like the future was playing out before them. the day lightkit would be named queen would be bittersweet, just as it was for every rising queen; it was a day that meant the death of a mother, when a leader had passed on. it was a day that had been stolen from lighteyes, but lightkit would be a great queen, she could see it already. it was in the way she held herself, the way her eyes lit up at the sight of the clan. it was her birthright, through and through, and already tawnyrose could see the security of highgarden for generations to come. "today marks a special day for highgarden," tawnyrose began at last, stepping forward to address her cats. "as a clan, we survived one of the worst winters the gods could have thrown at us. we continue to prosper, we are still growing strong each and every day. as evidence, i urge you to look no further than my kits. hawthornkit, bramblekit, and the heir to highgarden, lightkit. these are the moments that define our clan, just as the naming of new thorns also marks the prosperity for the next generation." from the front of the hollow, an excited shout went up followed quickly by ferretwhisker pointed hiss to silence her kits. at tawnyrose's side, lightkit let out a muffled laugh, and tawnyrose nodded in the direction of the cluster of young cats. "indeed, the day has come when elkkit, beechkit, harrierkit, quillkit, and dewkit are ready to be given their new names, and to begin their training as thorns. therefore, from this moment on, until you have finished your training and have earned your full names, you shall be known as elkpaw, beechpaw, harrierpaw, quillpaw, and dewpaw." at that, the group of new thorns bunched together, and the clan shouted praises for them. dewpaw and beechpaw touched their noses together, harrierpaw ducked away from ferretwhisker's incessant grooming, earning a booming laugh from elkpaw, and quillpaw grinned up at lightkit, who nodded back at him with a wave of her tail. when the cheers had quieted, tawnyrose cleared her throat. "elkpaw, your mentor will be pythoneyes. he is a knight with experience in highgarden, as well as from his former clan. his stories have enchanted so many of us, and i urge you to pay attention to everything that he had to say, as well as everything he shows you." from the middle of the crowd, pythoneyes appeared surprised, but daisypaw and briarpaw were quick to pick up the cheer for their adoptive father as he rose to meet elkpaw. then, tawnyrose looked to beechpaw. "your mentor will be obsidianwing. though he is not the biggest or fastest knight, he has a sharp mind. he mentored warblercry, who is a very talented and promising rose after his tutelage, so i have no doubts that he will pass on even more knowledge to you as well." though the knight had been absent for most of the moon, spending time with smokemane and her family, he earned a loud roar of praise. at his side, sunglow jostled his shoulder encouragingly. after the mentor and his new thorn had touched noses, tawnyrose continued: "dippernose, you will be harrierpaw's mentor. as hornetshade's mentor, you proved time and time again that you are a very proficient teacher, with a wide range of knowledge ready to be passed on to the next generation. no one can question hornetshade's abilities, nor can anyone question your loyalty to the clan, and i trust that you will teach harrierpaw everything you know." dippernose appeared more confident than pythoneyes and obsidianwing, and he wore a large grin when he greeted the young tabby. "quillpaw, your mentor for will be tigergaze. though he is still young, no one could deny that he is one of our swiftest, strongest knights. when he was a newly named knight, he participated in the spring tournament and proved himself as one of our knights. he will be a great mentor, who will match your enthusiasm, and energy." just as tawnyrose had expected, tigergaze was shocked, moving only when hornetshade and iguanaspots nudged him to his paws. even from where tawnyrose was standing, she could see the quiver in the young tom's whiskers, appearing even more nervous than quillpaw. when tigergaze looked to tawnyrose, the queen managed an encouraging smile, and tigergaze squared his shoulders at last before leading quillpaw to sit with the other thorns and their mentors so that only dewpaw remained. "last but certainly not least, dewpaw, your mentor will be arcticblink. he's still quite new to the clan, but he's learned his position quickly. his speed is one of many assets he brings to the clan, so i suggest that you keep your eyes open and follow his lead. you'll find your bearings together, i'm sure of it." at last, tawnyrose stepped back to allow the clan to erupt into cheers for the new thorns and their mentors. ferretwhisker pushed forward to nuzzle each of her kits, while sunglow pushed his way between tigergaze and obsidianwing to congratulate his friends. through all of the excitement, lightkit looked up at tawnyrose, her eyes wide with wonder. "mom?" she asked, and tawnyrose smiled gently at her daughter. "i didn't... think it would be like this. smokemane is still hurt, and cirruskit, tornadokit, and tsunamikit are still sick, but everyone can still be happy like this... i didn't think it was possible." tawnyrose felt a pang in her chest, and she took the moment to sit and pull lightkit closer to her. "that's the thing about tragedy in a clan, my dear. bad things happen sometimes, and sometimes there are stretches of time when nothing bad happens. other times a lot of bad things will happen at once, but we can't let it destroy us," she said. lightkit's brow furrowed thoughtfully, and tawnyrose dipped her head to lick between her daughter's ears. "what are our words?" "growing strong," lightkit said, not missing a beat. "and what do our words mean?" "highgarden is always becoming stronger. like the roses and the trees and all of the other plants, we're always growing and bettering ourselves," lightkit said, and tawnyrose grinned, pleased. "our words are part of what make us strong. they remind us that we can be battered, we can be bruised and hurt, but we won't break. we're strong, and we need to weather the storms, my dear. smokemane was hurt, but she'll gt up again. flickersky's kits got sick, but they'll feel better soon enough. we need to grow strong so that nothing will knock us down. and, if we do, we need to be strong so we can get back to our paws," tawnyrose said. "the snows came, the snows are melting. the waters will come to overflow the banks. cats will get sick, and, at some point, cats will die. but we need to keep our eyes on the horizon and remember the words. as long as we remember the words, then highgarden will prosper. the storms are gone, and the flowers will grow again." for a long moment, the queen and her heir sat above their clan and considered tragedies and their words. then, from the middle of the hollow, quillpaw stood on his hind legs and called up to lightkit, who then looked to tawnyrose. "can i?" she asked, and tawnyrose nodded. "go, celebrate with them. but stay with quillpaw, don't get lost in the crowd," she said, watching lightkit climb down from their perch to join her friend. she wasn't alone for long, for bluetcrest came to join her a moment later, resting his head against her shoulder. "thank the gods winter is over," bluetcrest said, and tawnyrose hummed her agreement. "we'll need to move soon. with all of the snow, the rivers and rose lake are going to flood quickly. we have a lot of preparation to do," tawnyrose said, and bluetcrest nodded minutely. then, tawnyrose let out a breezy laugh. "we'll also need to arrange a tournament when we get to the old tower. to celebrate the new heir and the princes." at that, bluetcrest let out a purr. "the clan'll be excited for that," he said. "not even softglow can say no to that." tawnyrose flicked her tail as she glanced from bluetcrest and down into the crowd. "we have a lot of reasons to celebrate lately. it's time we did."
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Sept 12, 2020 10:29:36 GMT -8
spencer moved soundlessly through the moonlit camp, his paws brushing quietly over the soft grass of the clearing. all around him, highgarden was at peace. or, rather, most of the clan was at peace. through the shadows, familiar yellow eyes blinked, watching spencer's travel from the herbalist's den, but it wasn't erasmus who caught him first. "spencer, is that you?" wolfhowl's dark pelt slipped from the shadows, and she blinked at the herbalist earnestly. for a moment, spencer felt a momentary flash of fear, though he knew enough to stamp it down. across the clearing, erasmus stepped back into the darkness, well camouflaged, and spencer managed a tight smile when the young rose padded closer, her gaze curious. "you're up late tonight, is everything okay?" wolfhowl asked. spencer licked his lips careful, mindful that there could be more ears listening to him, though he can't help but feel that wolfhowl is entirely harmless. though wolfhowl had the same strong posture as her father, the same cleverness that maplelily had, she was still young, and he found himself doubting that she would ever even consider that there might be more to the world than meets the eye. he supposed that he was like that when he was young, before he learned more, and spencer found himself momentarily wishing that he held the same innocence evident in wolfhowl's eyes. "i hope nothing's wrong with smokemane." "oh, no, nothing like that," spencer assured her, and wolfhowl immediately appears to relax, though she blinked up at him again. "that's a relief to hear," she said, only for her head to tip to one side. "what're you up to, then? it's a little late to go looking for herbs, don't 'cha think?" with that, spencer managed a tight smile with the realization that wolfhowl must have been put on guard for the night. highgarden cats tended to get fidgety whenever the seasons changed, and it made sense that they would be keeping the camp alert and secure. he cleared his throat. "it would be very hard to see what leaves i'm rummaging through, wouldn't it?" he mused, letting out a quiet snort of uneasy laughter. "but, thankfully, nothing like that. i just... need some air, you know? our den has been very crowded lately, with smokemane and her family, and flickersky and the little ones." wolfhowl was quiet for a moment, and her glance traveled from spencer, to the camp's exit, and back again. spencer held his breath and waited. technically, he knew that wolfhowl wasn't of the authority to tell him that he couldn't leave the camp, but the thought of catching any further attention made his blood pound in his ears. then, at last, wolfhowl shrugged and tossed her head. "just don't get lost, okay? yewbloom said that the floods might be on their way, and i'd rather not have to run out in the middle of the night to try and rescue you." she grinned then, and spencer didn't hesitate to begin padding away from her. "of course, i won't be long," he assured her. "i'll be back before you'll even know it." without waiting for her answer, spencer hurried away, ducking out of the thorny tunnel. it was darker outside of camp, and spencer cast one last glance over his shoulder, as if to make sure that wolfhowl wasn't following him. she was a kind cat, a sweet molly through and through, and spencer had the thought that she had no place getting caught up in everything else that was happening. when he was sure that he was entirely alone, spencer ducked his head low and padded forward, looking for the familiar dark shape of his mate. the moon, overhead, was only a thin sliver, as if a claw had caught in the nightsky, cutting into the darkness. it offered little light. "erasmus?" spencer hissed quietly when he failed to find the other tom. "erasmus?" he tried again, only to be cut off with another, more pointed hiss from behind. spencer whirled around on his heels and blinked up at his mate. "you need to keep your voice down," erasmus said gruffly, but there was no anger aimed towards spencer in the words. the larger tom's ears swiveled back towards camp. "it's a good thing they're all deep sleepers," erasmus added, only to swing his head back towards spencer. their gazes locked for a long moment before the massive dark tom dipped his head. a quiet purr rumbled from the back of spencer's throat, and his eyes fell closed when erasmus nuzzled his cheek. then erasmus pulled back and nodded to spencer. "c'mon, let's go a little further, just in case." like that, under the cover of darkness, with only the smallest sliver of moon keeping watch over their heads, spencer listened to erasmus' deep, rumbling tone. erasmus' fur was warm, warmer than the gentle breeze that caressed spencer's cheek, but he felt his heart clench with the chill of what erasmus was saying. when it was over and they had settled, spencer drew in a deep breath and looked up at his mate. "you're sure this is what we need to do?" he asked. when erasmus merely stared at him with his large, unblinking yellow eyes, spencer ducked his head to examine his paws. "maybe groveclan won't do anything... maybe the queen will keep her head down." when erasmus scoffed, spencer felt a chill run down his spine and he shivered. it was like ice. "if groveclan hasn't forgotten by now, then they never will. and the queen..." erasmus scoffed again and shook his head. "no, this has to be done." spencer felt his throat tighten. "you said this would be different," he choked out. "after the kingdom... after dante... this was supposed to be different." "it will be," erasmus coaxed him, and spencer basked in the way his voice softened for his ears only. it was venom, he knew in that moment, and he knew that it couldn't be true. but it was too easy to lean against erasmus' stronger shoulder and nod along to his words. "we do this, and we'll always be safe, spencer. groveclan and tawnyrose won't be our problems anymore. we'll be safe. don't you want that?" "more than anything," spencer whispered. "but this -" "is necessary," erasmus cut in sharply, only to soften again, resting his chin atop spencer's head. "if this is too much for you, tell me now and i'll find another way. but this will happen, with or without you." spencer pulled away from erasmus then, shaking his head as if to clear it. he felt his heart resting in his throat. he remembered the sharp scent of blood in the air in the kingdom's camp; he remembered the look in dante's eyes; he thought of the way his paws ached and ears burned with guilt and embarrassment as they traveled away from the home they once knew. he knew what had to be done. "when?" he asked, and erasmus managed a tight smile. "once i take care of bluetcrest."
even from where the rest of the patrol was walking behind the thorns, it was easy to make out their raised voices over the crest of the rolling hills. when a particularly loud shout rang out, sagecloud exchanged a sideways glance with dippernose, who smiled broadly. at the same time, the new rose, charredbreeze, spoke up from behind them: "are they always this excitable, even on a dawn patrol?" she asked. she had been found lingering by the old tower when yewbloom and wolverinesnap made the rounds to check on the flooding. as the days passed, she seemed to grow more and more comfortable in highgarden, even offering to take a spot on the dawn patrol along rose lake and the eastern borders. "if you think they're excited now, just wait until we get to the water," daystrike said on sagecloud's other side, and dippernose purred gently. "i swear, there's something about thorns and water. it's like they can't wait to get into the water any chance they get. they'd play in puddles if given the chance," dippernose said. another shout came from the thorns in the distance, where harrierpaw and dewpaw had taken off to. arcticblink exchanged a glance with daystrike and tipped his head to the younger tom. without missing a beat, daystrike sniffed the air and took off after the other tom, to check on the thorns. after they had gone, dippernose cleared his throat and looked to charredbreeze. "you've met hornetshade, right?" when charredbreeze nodded, dippernose hummed pleasantly. "the first time i took him out for training, i thought that it would have been a good idea to take him swimming. with how much flooding highgarden gets, i figured that it would have been a good idea, you know? and he was so excited to try it. he told everyone that he was going to be the best swimmer in the world. the way he was jumping around and talking, you would've thought that he was half-fish," dippernose said with another laugh. "to hear softglow tell the story, it was like hornetshade was trying to swim in the air all the way out of camp," sagecloud added in, earning a hearty laugh from charredbreeze. "and he was so excited," dippernose continued with a wide grin. as they rose over the final crest of the hill that led the way to rose lake and the groveclan border. down before, it was easy to see arcticblink and daystrike approaching where dewpaw and harrierpaw were wrestling, the two young thorns making the most of their time. "of course, looking back now i see how wrong it was to take him out swimming on the first day, but... all's well now, he can swim with the best of them." "only after he was saved by a groveclan apprentice," sagecloud pointed out, earning another laugh from charredbreeze, though dippernose lashed his tail and stuck up his nose. "these days i'm not sure if we can thank groveclan for much of anything," dippernose said casually. sagecloud's eyes widened at the knight's blunt words, though there was no time to reply before dippernose directed his attention elsewhere, down to where harrierpaw had been pinned down by her sister. "harrierpaw, it's like we practiced! use your hindlegs, there you go!" he shouted his encouragement to the little tabby, who managed to knock dewpaw off-balance. arcticblink turned to face the rest of the approaching patrol, his grin lopsided. at the same time, charredbreeze leaned over towards sagecloud. "is there an issue with groveclan?" the newest rose asked. sagecloud opened her mouth, then, unsure what she could possibly say in that moment, was grateful for when daystrike padded over to the older mollies. the young tom's brilliant green eyes flashed in the bright sunlight that streamed over the treetops from groveclan's territory and beyond. "when i was traveling with leopardsun, i always thought that clans became too easily distrustful of one another if left alone for too long," he commented, flicking his ear absently, as if flicking away a bug. "i never got it. wouldn't it be better for all of us to work together," he said. arcticblink raised his head at that and shrugged his shoulders. "you'd think that. but you never know their intentions on the other side of the border until it's too late." in that moment, realization struck sagecloud, and she felt as though the breath had been knocked out of her lungs. acticblink always seemed particularly mild-mannered, dippernose always chatty and welcoming. even daystrike, though he was decidedly more closed off than the others, seemed to bristle at the scent of groveclan on the breeze. despite his words, the young knight was not at ease, and sagecloud felt the world sway as she realized that it was worse than she had thought. charredbreeze, as new to the clan as she was, shifted. the set of her broad shoulders changed as she stiffened, suddenly more on her guard. already, another had changed in her opinion. no longer was charredbreeze a neutral party, as she had become infected with the ideas that ensured that, as bluetcrest told her, there were less cats volunteering to patrol along their border with groveclan. it was like the wind had shifted, bringing with it a cloud that hovered over their heads. which then broke when harrierpaw and dewpaw came running over, the young mollies breathless from playfighting in the grass. "arcticblink!" dewpaw called to her mentor when they were within earshot. "we smelle groveclan cats. there must be a patrol coming this way." the group exchanged a knowing glance before arcticblink nodded to dewpaw. "good job, you two." with that, the highgarden patrol gathered themselves and took their time as they reached the lake's edge. sure enough, it as only a matter of moments until distant shapes were visible through the trees, and voices soon followed. a broad-shouldered tabby was bounding alongside a smaller white cat, and the rest of the groveclan patrol spread out, close enough to continue their conversation, but also able to sweep around the border. when the groveclan cats spotted them, one of the tom let out a shout, and dippernose sniffed absently. "harrierpaw," dippernose murmured to his thorn. "stick close to me. charredbreeze, take up the rear," he said, and harrierpaw brushed past her sister in order to stand just behind her mentor's shoulder. within a matter of steps, the two patrols stood on opposite sides of the border, and sagecloud could feel the way arcticblink and daystrike stiffened beside her on either shoulder. "good morning," dippernose said, and the burmese tom let out a musical purr. "it's good to see you again, dippernose!" when dippernose didn't answer immediately, the sleek tom shuffled his paws and glanced to the rest of his patrol. the pair of massive ginger cats exchanged a glance, and there was no mixing the confusion that lit their eyes. then the tom tried again, his eyes flicking to harrierpaw. "oh! no wonder i haven't seen you. you have a new apprentice? you must be busy. and she looks so much like your last apprentice, dippernose, what a coincidence!" "i suppose so," dippernose said shortly. harrierpaw shuffled her paws, her bright blue eyes round. she mumbled something to dippernose, who kept his eyes trained on the groveclan cats. "and i have a new apprentice too. it's just like the old times for us, wouldn't you say? though petalpaw's a different color from midnightstream," the groveclan cat continued. again, silence reigned for a long beat and the tom cleared his throat. "has she learned to swim yet? should we see if she's a better swimmer than hornetshade? and maybe petalpaw could surprise us." after another beat, dippernose waved his tail towards his patrol. "we should be on our way, pinefeather," dippernose said bluntly, and there was no missing the flash of confusion in pinefeather's eyes. "er... right, of course! i hope all's well in highgarden. maybe i'll catch you around here again soon," pinefeather said, but dippernose flicked his tail and the highgarden patrol began to move. sagecloud glanced over her shoulder, past charredbreeze, to see the groveclan cats staring after them. from the front of the patrol, she heard dippernose scoff and daystrike rolled his eyes. sagecloud felt sick.
otterfur breathed in deeply as he sat across from hurricanejaw and tulipstream as the pair shared a mouse. his paws ached from a long patrol, though his muscled burned pleasantly, as the sun set in the distance. as soon as he joined his clanmates, hurricanejaw had commented that otterfur looked tired, and he murmured an excuse about how bassflow took their patrol further than he had been expecting. at that, tulipstream had laughed airily. "i'll have a word with him when i see him later," she said jokingly, with had earned another round of laughter from her companions. after other light conversation, they had lapsed into easy, comfortable silence that lasted until movement catch the corner of otterfur's vision. sure enough, there was no missing hornetshade's distinct tabby stripes as the younger tom crossed the clearing and ducked out of the front tunnel. carefully, taking his time, otterfur counted out time in his head before parting his jaws in a wide yawn and stretching his forepaws. "gods, i feel like i'm falling asleep here," he said with what he hoped sounded like an easy chuckle. sure enough, hurricanejaw looked to the horizon and reached out a paw to nudge otterfur. "it's a little early to turn in, don't you think?" he asked, and otterfur nodded quickly. "you have a point. if i go to sleep now, i'll be up again in the middle of the night, just pacing the den," otterfur said. "and we'd hate to have that. don't need you treading on my tail," hurricanejaw snapped back with confident ease. then, his eyes soften as he regarded otterfur. "seriously, if you're that tired, maybe you could take a nap, just for a little bit?" he suggested, and tulipstream nodded with a gentle smile. "or you could go for a walk? some fresh air might wake you up?" without missing a beat, otterfur nodded and began to push himself up to stand. "a walk sounds like a great idea! thanks, i think i'll go try that, and -" "do you want me to go with you?" hurricanejaw asked, already beginning to shift and rise, but otterfur shook his head quickly and nudged his friend's shoulder. hurricanejaw sat back down and looked up at otterfur expectantly. "don't worry about it, i'll be fine, and i'll be back before you know it," otterfur said. "besides, i'd hate for you to walk yourself out for the day, old tom," he added, earning a playful hiss from hurricanejaw. with that, otterfur forced himself to maintain a slow, steady walk out of the camp, as if he was merely going on a stroll. there was nothing urgent, he told himself to keep from speeding up, there's nothing wrong. but, as soon as the soft grass brushed his pads and he was outside of the camp, otterfur couldn't help but kick up dirt as he ran, tearing after hornetshade's scent in his rush after the younger tom. along the way, he picked up warblercry's scent as well, and it was only a matter of time until otterfur found them, sitting together in the shadows of a thicket. ever since warblercry had returned from her trip to groveclan and her meeting with juniperstorm and another groveclan warrior, the pair had been on-edge. as many times as otterfur told them to sit tight and act as they normally would, it becoming obvious that they were nervous. otterfur heard word pass through the ranks of how hornetshade had been even more irritable than ever, and how warblercry was talking less and less and jumping at the slightest of noises. ayalla and jaytalon had been saying that they thought the pair were fighting, while betonypetal commented that it didn't make sense if they were in a fight, for they only seemed to be talking to each other. when otterfur settled before the pair, warblercry shot him a hopeful look, though hornetshade appeared too busy focusing on his own paws. there was a heavy moment of silence before otterfur cleared his throat and leaned closer towards the younger cats. "i need you to listen very carefully," he said. "right now, i need you two to do nothing." truth be told, otterfur knew that it likely wasn't going to carry over well with either of them, though he had expected that they would be able to keep their heads. warblercry blinked up at him with wide eyes. "what do you mean nothing?" she asked, but otterfur didn't get the chance to answer before hornetshade's head snapped up and he let out a hiss. without warning, hornetshade found his paws and began to pace, his tail lashing and eyes blazing. "we can't do nothing," hornetshade hissed, spitting pointedly. "now that we know what he's done, we can't just sit back and wait for him to hurt someone else. he killed badgerstar's kit and tried to start a war." "and the knights and roses... they believe him," warblercry said. "maybe if we did something when juniperstorm first came here, then we could have stopped this and had him driven out moons ago and we wouldn't be worrying now and -" "and what?" otterfur snapped at last, catching hornetshade off-guard. hornetshade's upper lip curled, but otterfur didn't hesitate. "what would you said then? and what would it have mattered? what does it matter now? because you didn't say anything, because you knew you had nothing to say and that no one would have listened to you even if you did." otterfur lashed his tail then and glanced between hornetshade and warblercry. "and the clan is on his side, even if they don't know it. it doesn't matter what you say a groveclan cat said, because they won't listen. and if tawnyrose finds out that you went to groveclan without permission -" he said, pointing to warblercry, "or if erasmus catches wind about your investigation, it won't end well. cats like erasmus don't care who stands in their way. they will kill you. cats like erasmus will go to whatever end to get the power they want." otterfur was breathing heavily by that point as his words grew louder and more intense. "cats like erasmus will force anyone to do anything for them, cats like viperstar don't care what happens to anyone around them so long as they wind up on top." there was a long moment of silence, broken only by otterfur's breathing until, at last, warblercry ducked her head. "otterfur, who's viperstar?" suddenly, his breath felt jagged in his throat, and it felt as if the world was closing in down around him. and then ottefur blinked and took in warblercry's concerned, earnest expression. "he..." otterfur tried to begin, only to shake his head rapidly. "he was a cat who wanted complete control of everyone around him and couldn't be stopped. he killed, he manipulated, and he... died. but only after trying to destroy my old clan. and i watched it all happen," he said. "that's why i can't let it happen here, but i also can't let you two put yourselves in reckless danger when i know it won't work. you both have too many eyes on you." "what are you going to do?" warblercry asked, and otterfur tipped his head back in the direction of camp. "i'm going to keep my ears and eyes open, and i suggest you do the same. if we can't go to the clan with what groveclan said, then we have to wait for him to mess up. and when that happens, we make our move." hornetshade bobbed his head, seeming to consider this, before blinking slowly at otterfur. "what if he doesn't mess up?" "he will," otterfur said after blowing out a long breath. "they always mess up." with that, otterfur nodded towards warblercry. "we can't all go back together, so you can go first, hornetshade and i will wait here for a few minutes." warblercry exchanged a glance with hornetshade, who nodded his agreement. with that, warblercry touched her nose to hornetshade's cheek before brushing past otterfur and bounding off into the dusk. in the distance, birdsong called the evening to a close, an hornetshade sat down across from otterfur. "can i ask you something?" hornetshade asked, and when otterfur nodded, the young tabby rolled his shoulders as he settled. "this viperstar... you feel like he used you?" he asked, and otterfur felt his chest tighten. "i know that i was used by him," otterfur said, and he saw no sympathy in hornetshade's eyes. "what did you do for him?" hornetshade asked. "what did he make you do? what did you do without him needing to ask?" it was like a coil in otterfur's chest, so tight and wedged so deep. and then it snapped and otterfur felt his eyes sting with tears. "i saw him do the worst things. he was my friend for so long and i... i thought he was a good cat and that he only wanted the best for us. i would have done anything for my friend but he... he started to ask more and do more. he said he wanted to help the clan, that he wanted to save us all from our leader but i didn't think or realize how horrible he had become until wasppaw." he had to stop for a moment, breathing deeply for a moment before he fixed hornetshade with a sharp glance. "i will not beg for your mercy, or beg for silence. i proved my loyalty the way i thought i had to for a cat i thought would save us and that i could trust. i was wrong, and i see that now. i was wrong." when hornetshade stood, otterfur didn't expect him to turn around. but just as he brushed past otterfur, hornetshade paused and glanced over his shoulder. "how'd he die?" hornetshade asked, and otterfur exhaled deeply. "i was told a bear," he said. hornetshade hummed thoughtfully at that. "if i'm given the chance, i'd kill erasmus. or die trying. what he did to groveclan, what he did to my... friend... what he could do here, it's not okay by me. i just don't think i could kill him, not in cold blood," hornetshade said. without waiting for otterfur's answer, the young knight bounded off, following warblercry's lead, and otterfur was left in silence, in the quiet of highgarden's territory.
sagecloud's panic after she went out on a patrol to check the groveclan border, admittedly, left bluetcrest feeling rather anxious within his own right. it was a slow anxiety, that bubbled low in his stomach and simmered, but rose to the surface time and time again, never letting him forget that it was there. though they had been aware of the groveclan-problem, it was easy to focus on other things over the past several moons. it was easier to fawn over tawnyrose's kits, to help tawnyrose train lightkit. it was easy to push it to the side and let it gather dust, but it was dawning on bluetcrest that it was past the point of being able to be sorted out so neatly, and that realization made his paws itch. "bluetcrest?" pythoneyes' voice broke through his reverie, and bluetcrest blinked quickly at his friend. the very sound of pythoneyes' laugh made bluetcrest feel a pang of warmth that started in his chest and spread until it reached the very ends of his whiskers. "i'm going to assume that you didn't hear a word i said?" he asked, and bluetcrest ducked his head sheepishly. "i'm sorry," he said. "it's been a long day and i think i'm just tired. i'm listening now, i'm sorry," bluetcrest said, but pythoneyes shook his head quickly. "you look like you have a lot on your mind. is there anything that i can do? i think you'll find that i'm a good listener," he offered, and bluetcrest felt another deeper, warmer pang spread through him. "i promise, i'm always here for you. you can trust me." for a long moment, bluetcrest considered his paws as he pondered pythoneyes' words before, at last, he shifted closer to his friend and lowered his voice. "i trust you, and you can't tell anyone anything about what i ask you, okay? it's just a hypothetical," bluetcrest said as he met pythoneyes' gaze, and the knight nodded slowly, his expresion showing clear concern. "what do you think about groveclan?" he asked. pythoneyes tipped his head to the side and shrugged. "i mean, i don't know much about them. i've never met any of their cats. but... the others don't seem to like them much. and if what erasmus said was true and they tried to frame him for a crime... i guess i wouldn't think very highly of them," pythoneyes said at last. bluetcrest took in his friend's words before swallowing down the lump in his throat. "what if everything you thought you knew about them was wrong?" bluetcrest asked. pythoneyes' mouth fell open and his eyes widened. "bluetcrest, i don't understand," he said. "what are you trying to say?" "it's hypothetical," bluetcrest repeated without giving an answer. "say that erasmus was lying, and that everything you've been told about groveclan is false. that everything you thought you knew was actually the opposite. what would you think of them then?" he asked with renewed urgency, and pythoneyes drew in a deep inhale. "i think..." he started, meeting bluetcrest's gaze with his own. "i think that i would think that we should know the truth. and i'd think that i'd feel bad for groveclan, for how poorly highgarden thinks of them now. and i think... i think i would be worried for you, bluetcrest, and for anyone else who knows the truth. because i think knowing what's a lie and what's the truth makes you a target, and i know that i care deeply about you and that i want you to be safe." pythoneyes' gaze was intense, and bluetcrest found it impossible to look away from his friend. "are you safe, bluetcrest?" he asked, and bluetcrest finally pulled back, sitting up and turning his cheek to pythoneyes. his chest felt too tight, and the anxiety bubbled up again. "i need you to forget what i said," bluetcrest told him. "it was hypothetical, it didn't mean anything. and i need to find tawnyrose." "you know, i wish i believed you," pythoneyes said, and bluetcrest managed a tight smile before he rose to his paws and turned away to try and find the queen. sure enough, when bluetcrest headed for tawnyrose's den, he arrived just in time to nearly collide with his best friend and lightkit, who padded regally beside her mother. "bluetcrest!" lightkit piped up, stretching her neck to touch her nose to bluetcrest's in greeting. "mama said we were coming to look for you." "oh?" bluetcrest said, looking to tawnyrose expectantly, mirroring her smile. "i was actually looking for you too. i think we need to talk about some things." but tawnyrose shook her head and motioned to her daughter and attendant, beckoning them to follow her. "bluetcrest, what's wrong? you sound so serious. now, now, i'm sure whatever it is can wait for a little while. because there are other things we need to talk about first. yewbloom and wolverinesnap checked on the water levels this morning and the banks are beginning to overflow, so it's time we moved camps." "are flickersky's kits old enough to handle the move?" bluetcrest asked. tawnyrose flicked her tail dismissively. "merlinsong said they've been taken care of since they had their colds. they're healthy and are causing more than enough trouble in the nursery already, so i think that speaks for itself. more importantly, we also have to arrange for the spring tournament," tawnyrose continued, and bluetcrest balked. "surely there are a few more pressing issues that we should discuss first," he said, but tawnyrose merely sniffed absently. "more important than honoring the seven gods that have blessed us? more important than honoring the heir and princes of highgarden? yewbloom's return, my kits, the moons of prosperity that we've had recently? there's so much to celebrate, bluetcrest," tawnyrose said, and bluetcrest grit his teeth but nodded his head, placatingly. "and what does softglow think of this?" he asked, and tawnyrose finally stopped and turned to face her attendant. "well, i don't know. he's been very busy lately. why don't you and lightkit go ask the king what he thinks?" she suggested, and lightkit straightened up at the mention of her name. "can we, bluetcrest?" lightkit asked. bluetcrest exchanged a glance with tawnyrose before he nodded at the clan's heir. "we'll come find you later, tawnyrose," bluetcrest said as lightkit headed in the direction of the nursery, and the attendant was left to trail after her. the inside of the nursery was dim and warm, and it took bluetcrest a long moment to let his eyes adjust to the lack of light that seeped between the gaps in the walls. then he watched as lightkit bounded forward, purring as she touched her nose to each of her brothers when they rose to meet her, and bluetcrest blinked at he made out softglow and flickersky settled towards the back of the den. flickersky's three kits were nestled into her flank, and softglow smiled tentatively up at bluetcrest. "didn't expect to see you here," softglow said. "come to visit?" "you could say that," bluetcrest said, only to grin when hawthornkit and bramblekit skidded into place in front of him. "well, hello you two," he said to the young toms, and he leaned his head down to nuzzle them both in turn. "uncle bluetcrest, can we go out into the camp and play?" bramblekit asked. "dad says that it's chilly, but he's barely been outside today. is it really that cold? lightkit got to play," hawthornkit pressed, and lightkit let out an indignant squeak. "i wasn't playing!" she argued. "i was training with mama." "yeah, and that's what you say whenever you're with quillpaw too, right?" hawthornkit teased his sister. when lightkit pushed at his shoulder, hawthornkit nudged her right back. when she pushed him again, it was harder, and he knocked sideways into bramblekit. within a matter of seconds, right before bluetcrest's eyes, the trio of kits dissolved into wrestling, and softglow let out a sigh. he rose from the nest and reached forward, grabbing hawthornkit by the scruff of his neck. when he put his son down, he nudged lightkit and bramblekit apart. "hey, what have i told you all? no rough playing in the nursery. cirruskit, tornadokit, and tsunamikit are resting. and you don't see adenium or snowykit causing issues, do you?" sure enough, the other pair of kits had stayed to their shared nest, and snowykit snickered at the display. "softglow, can we talk for a minute?" bluetcrest asked the king. curious, softglow's ears pricked and he looked to flickersky, who nodded towards bluetcrest, amusement clear in her eyes. "go on, i'll call if there's an issue," she said, and softglow blinked at her before following bluetcrest. "what is it?" softglow asked when they were off to the side, out of the way of the rest of the camp's activities. not too far away, sandstrike and privetears were sharing a mouse, merlinsong, sunglow, and obsidianwing were helping support smokemane as the rose took tenative steps around the camp as part of her recovery process, and stagpaw was talking loudly to the younger thorns about a battle move hurricanejaw had showed him. bluetcrest swallowed thickly and bunched his shoulders. "we need to talk some sense into tawnyrose," bluetcrest said. "she's so worried about the spring tournament. but... with so much going on at the moment, is that a good idea?" softglow blinked up at bluetcrest for a long moment before blowing out a sigh. "i've tried to talk her out of so many other things before, and i think this is a little issue at most. and maybe it'll even be good for us. we need a morale boost around here, something to take our minds off of all of the other issues from the past few moons, don't you think?" when bluetcrest said nothing, softglow shrugged his shoulders. "listen, bluetcrest, i agree with you that there are more important issues but i'm tired. i have to take care of the kits because she won't. my paws are tied at the moment. so if she wants to hold a tournament, then so be it, and we can think about the rest in time, and -" "a tournament?" bramblekit's voice chimed in. softglow and bluetcrest turned to look down at the little tabby prince staring up at them. without waiting for an answer, bramblekit charged back towards the nursery. "hawthornkit, there's gonna be tournament! dad said so!" he shouted, and softglow let out a laugh. "maybe this is a good thing, bluetcrest. and you look tired. maybe you should get some rest, okay?" and softglow turned away, leaving bluetcrest to watch as the king talked to his kits. lightkit broke away from the group to join where quillpaw was sitting with his littermates, and hawthornkit and bramblekit bounding around their father, showing off different battle moves. among it all, however, bluetcrest felt a chill run down his spine. he turned just in time to see erasmus walking away from him, and he dug his claws into the ground to steady himself.
"can i tell you something?" ferretwhisker asked flickersky as they walked towards the middle of the group. all around them, the rest of highgarden moved as they went on their way to the clan's second camp. flickersky glanced around to the knights and roses that helped carry her kits, just to check on the trio, from where riverfoam carried a squirming tornadokit, to where tigergaze gentle took cirruskit from sunglow to give his friend a break, and to where bassflow had tsunamikit. at last, the queen grinned and nodded to ferretwhisker. "of course, anything. what's on your mind?" flickersky asked, and ferretwhisker ducked her head to hide a bashful smile. "it feels almost silly to bring it up but... i feel like i need to tell someone. do you remember the last time we moved camps and you told me about stormshroud?" she asked, and flickersky let out a airy laugh. "gods, yes," flickersky said. "that feels like so long ago. it's crazy to think how much has changed since then. now the kits are here, and we're moving camps again. they weren't even born then, and now they'll get to see it." around them, the clan was abuzz with news as the cats took the day off from formal patrols to talk to one another. ferretwhisker watched as stagpaw and rabbitpaw ducked between hurricanejaw, otterfur, and birchflame were speaking. the pair of mentors called after their thorns, but they turned to laughter as quillpaw bustled past with lightkit hot on his heels. "i know exactly what you mean, so much has changed since then," ferretwhisker agreed, and flickersky nudged her shoulder gently. "ferretwhisker, you're stalling, what is it?" flickersky asked, earning a gentle laugh from her friend. "well, i met someone, actually. he's from another clan - have you heard about the clan that settled on our borders the past few moons? bearclan?" ferretwhisker knew she was rambling and she caught herself. she ducked her head and smoothed down her chest fur, smiling at the sound of flickersky's rumbling purr. "oh, you've been holding out on me!" flickersky gushed, resting her head on ferretwhisker's shoulder. "i'm so happy for you! you need to tell me everything about him. what's his name?" she asked. "his name's nightfur. he's quite sweet, and we met while we were on patrols, you know, nothing serious but he just... caught my eye. and there was something different about him, if that makes sense? and he's very handsome, let me tell you -" ferretwhisker was saying. as she spoke about nightfur, she reveled in the sweet sound of flickersky's laugh and the comforting bump and gentle press of the rest of the clan around her. certainly, each time they made the trip, it become more evident of how large highgarden had grown from one season-cycle to the next. kits that had to be carried one journey raced their litermates the next, and ferretwhisker was stopped in the middle of her story as dewpaw bumped past her leg, elkpaw hot on her heels. "careful, you two!" ferretwhisker called after them, only to roll her eyes fondly. as they ran, dewpaw glanced once over her shoulder to see elkpaw racing after her. "sorry mom!" she called out, only to duck between cougarstrike and wolfhowl in a move to try and avoid elkpaw's outstretched paw, but it was no use. "tag, you're it!" elkpaw called, only to race in the opposite direction, and dewpaw let out a quiet huff. "i'm gonna get you for that!" dewpaw shouted, turning on her heels in the direction she had last saw quillpaw run off with lightkit, only to miss when her brother saw her coming and ducked behind yewbloom and wolverinejaw as the pair walked together. when dewpaw had gone, yewbloom let out a laugh and glanced towards the thorn and his niece. "are you two having fun?" yewbloom asked. when the pair nodded, yewbloom grinned and nudged wolverinesnap with his shoulder. "unfortunately, little queen, i don't think we can be your hiding spot for much longer. dewpaw will probably be sniffing this way again. but i do hope quillpaw is keeping an eye on you," yewbloom said, and lightkit purred as she pressed against quillpaw's flank. "he's a good partner," lightkit said. "i'm keeping my promise, yewbloom. i'm not leaving her side," quillpaw chimed in, earning another of yewbloom's vibrant smiles. "good, very good." "dewpaw's incoming," wolverinesnap interjected. with one last wink from yewbloom, quillpaw and lightkit hustled away, ducking between their clanmates as they went to avoid dewpaw's detection. with a blissful sigh, yewbloom rested his head on wolverinesnap's shoulder. "do you remember what it was like to be their age?" he asked, only to balk when wolverinesnap chuckled. "what?" "you make it seem like you're an elder, by gods," wolverinesnap purred. "you're only a few moons older than me. if that makes you as ancient as your sighing makes it sound, then what does that make me?" "in that case, i must be dust," pythoneyes added in from nearby, earning a snort of laughter from yewbloom. "and bluetcrest is on his way." from pythoneyes' other side, bluetcrest rolled his eyes. "as long as i'm not as old as you, then, i'm happy," bluetcrest said. there was a lightness to the attendant's step as he had spent his time for the beginning of the journey weaving among the crowd, making sure that all of the clan members were safe and handling the trip well. several scouts had been sent out ahead of the main patrol to check for any flooding, but arcticblink, leopardsun, betonypetal, and privetears had returned without any reason for concern. after making one last round to check on tawnyrose, softglow, and merlinsong at the front of the patrol, bluetcrest gravitated towards pythoneyes, where he had been with yewbloom, wolverinesnap, and several other members of the clan. by the time they had joined the conversation, bluetcrest had become increasingly aware of erasmus walking nearby with spencer, though the pair seemed too caught up in their own conversation to be paying any attention to where they were walking. from the other side of the group, bluetcrest caught sagecloud's eye, and the rose flicked her ear in a silent signal, to say that she was keeping an eye on erasmus from her position with mapleshadow, charredbreeze, and direfang. "and eramus, i hate to say that you're beyond memory, my friend," yewbloom piped up, and bluetcrest a chill grip his pelt as those sharp yellow eyes turned in the direction of the prince. erasmus twisted his head once to whisper something to spencer, who nodded in turn and turned, backing towards the rear of the crowd. he called out towards kitechaser, ayalla, and tanagercall. bluetcrest made out some comment about scouting for more flooding. but his attention turned again to erasmus when the large knight's rumbling voice reached his ears. "i was thinking, pythoneyes... everyone in this clan loves your stories. i think it could pass the time a bit if you told us one now," erasmus said. pythoneyes stared at the larger tom for a long moment, his green eyes blown wide, before yewbloom purred and nudged pythoneyes. "that's a wonderful idea, erasmus," yewbloom said, and wolverinesnap nodded his encouragement. when pythoneyes looked to bluetcrest, the attendant managed a tight smile. "you do tell the best stories," he said, and he couldn't help but notice the fear in pythoneyes' gaze. but the knight nodded once, lowering his face as if to compose himself. "alright," pythoneyes said. "alright, how about the one about the fox and the badger?" "sounds like a new one," wolverinesnap said, and pythoneyes smiled sheepishly. "we all here know how brutal winters can be in certain territories, right? there are the blizzards that make your whiskers freeze until you fear they'll fall off, or the ice that's so cold it makes your pads bleed if you're not careful," pythoneyes began. "or if you don't have an herbalist as skilled as merlinsong," mapleshadow interjected from the other side of the group, and bluetcrest looked over long enough to catch sagecloud's eye again. "exactly right," pythoneyes said with a breezy laugh. "and there are some blizzards, some storms and cold weather that come on so suddenly. it's like one minute you're melting in your fur and looking for a lake to refresh yourself, and then in the next moment you're half-frozen, looking for any place to get out of the snow. and we're lucky to have warm dens and nests made with moss and feathers, and whatever else we can find. we have our families, our best friends, and our denmates to help warm us up. but not all creatures are so lucky. because any clan cat knows that the most unlikable, most solitary animals are the badgers and the foxes. and with good reason." normally, when listening to one of pythoneyes' stories, it was easy to get lost in the moment. it was easy to block out the rest of the world. but the anxiety bubbled deep in bluetcrest's chest, reaching a fever pitch with each step he took and every word that pythoneyes spoke, until he became too aware. he could hear the brush of erasmus' fur against the ground, and he heard when ayalla, kitechaser, and tanagercall returned, racing up towards him. "bluetcrest," kitechaser called to him, and bluetcrest was aware of the lull in pythoneyes' story, and he waved his tail for his friend to continue without him. bluetcrest turned to the trio of mollies for their report. "there's some flooding nearby, we may need to divert our path a bit towards the east, just in case," kitechaser said. bluetcrest nodded quickly. "go ahead to tell softglow and tawnyrose, kitechaser. ayalla, tanagercall, the apprentices and a few of the kits have been playing tag. if you could gather them up. the last thing we need is for one of them to go missing with a flood so close," he ordered. when the three had gone, bluetcrest looked to yewbloom and nodded to the prince. "there's some flooding, i'm going to go check it out, make sure it's not too bad." "do you want me to go with you?" yewbloom asked, but bluetcrest shook his head. "no, no, we're already so close to the old tower and the groveclan border. i'm sure it's nothing to worry about," he said. in that same moment, bluetcrest caught sight of quillpaw weaving among the clan, and bluetcrest realized with a sinking stomach that the young thorn was alone. lightkit wasn't with him. bluetcrest's mouth felt dry, and he flicked his ear in a silent signal. the next time he looked across the group, sagecloud had disappeared into the trees, waiting for him. "i'll be back," he choked out to yewbloom and the others. bluetcrest held pythoneyes' gaze for a moment too long, and it was hard to turn away. even as aware as bluetcrest was, there was no mistaking the ringing in his ears, the way his entire head felt as though it was filled with moss. by the time he reached sagecloud, the chatter of the patrol had moved on, and sagecloud looked at him with wide eyes. "bluetcrest, what's going on?" she asked him, and he blinked at her. "i think lightkit's missing. she wasn't with quillpaw. she's always at his side and he was looking for something. and there's flooding and -" he tried to explain, but he realized that sagecloud wasn't looking at him. she was looking over his shoulder, and bluetcrest whipped around to stare at erasmus. "sagecloud," he choked out. "you need to run." "bluetcrest -" sagecloud said, but he cut her off with a hiss. his claws dug into the soft ground as the dark shadow loomed over him. erasmus's dark fur bristled, and bluetcrest knew that he could never beat erasmus in a fight. he could only hope that sagecloud was faster on her paws than erasmus was. "go," he hissed again, right before a massive paw swung and slammed into the side of his head. he felt claws score through his pelt, and the ground rushed up to meet him. the world crackled black, into and out of focus. he heard a thud of pawsteps, sagecloud try to shout before she was silenced, and then another thud against the ground. the last thing bluetcrest thought was that he had tried, that lightkit was missing, and that pythoneyes had been right. he should have been afraid. and then the world went dark.
"where are we going?" lightkit asked spencer as she trailed the herbalist. "quillpaw's going to be really worried, he takes his promise really seriously." "it's not much further. i just thought that, as the future heir of highgarden, you should see the groveclan border. it's very important to know your bordering clans, you know," spencer said, and lightkit nodded sagely. "you need to know who the leader is, who the deputy is, what their territory is like. do you know what's most important?" he asked, and when lightkit shook her head, spencer smiled, and she had the thought that it didn't look much like a smile. if anything, the scent of fear washed off of him in waves and it made her fur bristle. "you need to know what their scent is like, so you can't mistake it." "groveclan... mama said that their territory is mainly trees. she said we don't talk to them much," lightkit said, only to gasp as the clearly on the border opened up before her. there was water from rose lake, and the waterfall like nothing she had ever seen before. "it's beautiful," she said. "go ahead," spencer said with that same strange smile. "you can get a little closer. they're going to know you too, someday. when you're queen. do you know who the leader of groveclan is? who the deputy is?" when lightkit padded forward, she had her back turned to spencer. she didn't see the way he began to cry, his tears peppering the grass and budding flowers. she didn't see erasmus emerge silently from the trees with blood staining his paws. all she saw was greenery in each direction. if she heard spencer's choked sobs, she made no motion. instead she thought for a moment. "badgerstar is the leader, and lionheart is the deputy," she said. "that's good," spencer choked out. even as she gasped, this time not from the beautiful sight, but as she fell, he sobbed and shook and murmured to himself: "that's good, lightkit, you're so smart. so, so smart."
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Sept 12, 2020 12:11:42 GMT -8
when sagecloud heard bluetcrest's shouted warning, she had tried to run, but it was like her paws were rooted deep into the ground. she imagined that she was like a tree, strong like one of the towering oak trees above their heads, with leaves that rustled so delicately in the breeze. she thought of all of the times she had lounged on the border, talking to brindlepelt in the shade of the trees that protected them from the heat of the day. trees were strong, unmovable forces, sagecloud told herself as she watched bluetcrest face erasmus. she thought that bluetcrest had never seemed to be a small cat before, in the seasons that she had come to know him. but he looked like an ant in the shade of a tree when erasmus stood over him, swinging a massive paw that toppled bluetcrest. she saw blood, she heard the sound of bluetcrest hit the ground, and erasmus's threatening snarl mingled with bluetcrest's cry of pain as his pelt was torn, staining his snowy fur crimson. and when erasmus' yellow eyes turned towards her, sagecloud felt as though she had been uprooted, torn from the ground as she tried to find her paws. she tried to gather herself and to shout, though she barely made it more than a few tail-lengths before he grabbed her tail in his powerful jaws. he wrenched her to the ground, and she tried her best to lash out, to fight him off. the metallic scent of blood lifted into the air from where bluetcrest was lying pliantly, and sagecloud thought of brindlepelt. she thought of her mate's laugh, she thought of the smell of berries and sunshine in the summer and the feeling of drinking from cold springs. she thought of the future she had brindlepelt had talked about, of how they were travel all the length of highgarden and strikersclan together. sagecloud could meet brindlepelt's kits, and they even fantasized of venturing to find the kits sagecloud lost when ravenclan split. they imagined all of the good, and it spread out before sagecloud, even as she struggling, her claws sinking into the soft dirt to try and pull free from erasmus' grasp. she opened her eyes in time to watch the massive paw, reddened by bluetcrest's blood, come down on her face. there was pain, though she couldn't find the strength to scream. she thought of brindlepelt, and she wondered if she had told her how much she loved her the last time they parted ways. for all of the times they joked around and sagecloud played off as aloof, she realized how much she loved her mate, and how much she didn't want to die and leave her far behind. and then the world went black in another snap of pain. but she wasn't dead. instead, the pain came back, and sagecloud found that she had the ability to breathe when she let out a low groan. she entire body ached, and she itched all over. she was aware that majority of the pain centered on the left side of her face, and when she tried to blink her eyes open, she felt dizzy from the pain when she tried to open that eye. instead, she had to grit her teeth against the pain and opened only her right eye to take in the scene around her. from the slant of the shadows and the orange tint of the sky overhead through the leaves, it was clear that some time had passed. by that point, she figured, erasmus had moved on, and the very thought of the massive knight gave sagecloud the motivation to struggle onto her stomach, and she grunted as she got her paws underneath her. she staggered but managed to steady herself, though she was already panting from the effort. as stale as erasmus' scent was, however, the scent of bluetcrest's blood was stronger, and the memories washed back over sagcloud, all but knocking her off her feet again. she twisted her head, wary of her blind-side, and she finally found the queen's attendant right where he had been attacked. "bluetcrest?" sagecloud called to him. the slight breeze rustled his fur, but sagecloud couldn't make out any further discernible movement, and she stumbled in his direction, only to collapse at her clanmate's side. "bluetcrest? please, wake up," she begged, nudging his side. she was comforted only by the shallow rise and fall of his flank. "you need to wake up," sagecloud whispered, but bluetcrest still didn't stir. by that point, it was clear that erasmus had left them for dead, assuming that they would bleed out or otherwise fall to their wounds. and it seemed that he had all but succeeded. bluetcrest had a horrible slash across his chest and his cheek, and his hip was bent at an angle that made sagecloud's stomach churn. sagecloud's entire face burned with pain, and she knew that she likely wasn't faring any better than bluetcrest. she felt dizzy and light, as though she was floating on her paws with each step, and she was hit with a sudden exhaustion. it would be nice to take a rest, she thought. a patrol surely would be by soon enough, and she couldn't help bluetcrest in her current state. it would be easier to rest and wait. her legs were shaky underneath her, and they were close to the groveclan border, too far for her to carry bluetcrest to the old tower. but it was with that very thought that sagecloud snapped to attention. she sniffed the air and, sure enough, through the strong scent of blood, was a strong scent of groveclan, and it gave sagecloud pause. it didn't make sense. they weren't close enough to the border for the scent to be so strong, even if a patrol had accidently crossed over or just passed by. there was no explanation. and then there was one, and sagecloud knew what the scene would look like to a highgarden search party, out to find the queen's attendant and a lost rose who never made it back with them. they would be dead, covered in groveclan scent after a clear attack. before sagecloud's eyes, it all made sense, and she found the rush of adrenaline as strength to take bluetcrest's scruff in her jaws. immediately, she felt her legs buckling, hardly able to carry her, let alone bluetcrest, but she had no choice. she had to try. desperation drove her for another few steps, and then her jaws lost strength. and then she collapsed. when she tried to find her paws again, she found that she couldn't even feel her legs. pain surged again, from her whiskers to tail. dark spots blotched out what remained of her vision, and then she lost focus again. she spiraled, and then there was nothing.
✦
the night air was warm, especially for so early in spring as tawnyrose sat in the middle of highgarden's second camp's clearing. moons away meant that many of the dens and nests were stale and in need of several patches and new bedding, but it was certainly safer there, away from the waters that threatened the clan each season cycle. in the larger scheme of everything, patching up a few walls and finding fresh moss after a long day of travel seemed a small price to pay if it meant protecting highgarden. the kits in particular, tawnyrose thought, were so small and helpless. they were too small to fight off the rush of flood waters. as if on a cue, softglow emerged from the nursery were bramblekit and hawthornkit, and tawnyrose tipped her head when she caught his eye. in response, softglow ducked his head towards the pair of kits, motioning them back towards the side of the nursery, where ayalla and flickersky were bundling moss for their nests. at the same time, dewpaw and harrierpaw raced by, and tawnyrose's eyes strayed in the direction of the thorn's den. there, seedpaw and rabbitpaw helped beechpaw with the nests and quillpaw paced, his tail flicking. his eyes met tawnyrose's for a long moment before the young thorn turned his back to the queen and he disappeared into the shadows. "how's the nursery?" tawnyrose asked, forgoing a greeting when softglow finally reached her. his blue eyes were bright, glinting in the moonlight, his fur turned a startling silver that rippled when he shrugged his shoulders. "snowykit and adenium were being helpful weaving a few leaves into weaker spots, though it'll need a little more work tomorrow. we can send out a few thorns to bring back brambles tomorrow, i'm sure their den could use it too. but flickersky and ayalla have already assured me that they could handle any fox that even tries to come close to the kits," he reported, and tawnyrose hummed thoughtfully. "i'll ask bluetcrest to take care of it tomorrow when he gets back," tawnyrose said, and softglow nodded slowly. "he's not back yet?" he asked, not missing the slightest flare of worry in tawnyrose's green eyes. he didn't need an answer. last they had been told was when kitechaser told them that they had spotted flooding while scouting during the patrol. pythoneyes and yewbloom both said that bluetcrest had gone to check on it, insisting that he didn't need any help, and no one had seen the tom since. softglow lowered his gaze. "well, it wouldn't be the first time bluetcrest disappeared. maybe he found a new friend out there again," he said, aiming for humor, though he knew from the way tawnyrose's mouth twitched that neither of them believed it. softglow tried to swallow down the bile in his throat. instead, tawnyrose cleared her throat. "are the kits helping with the nursery too, with snowykit and adenium?" she asked, and there was no mistaking the fond softness that rounded the king's gaze. "since when have bramblekit and hawthornkit ever made themselves helpful in anything other than causing a whirlwind of chaos?" tawnyrose sniffed thoughtfully, though her eyes strayed towards the entrance, betraying her thoughts. "and lightkit? her brothers inherited all the trouble, not her. surely she's stayed out of the way, at the very least." perhaps tawnyrose was expecting some brushed-off response, something nonchalant and conversational before softglow excused himself. instead, softglow's words made her grow cold. "lightkit isn't in the nursery," he said, and tawnyrose could hear the confusion on his tone. "i thought she was with you or quillpaw. hawthornkit and bramblekit said they haven't seen her since early in the patrol." tawnyrose turned her head back to softglow slowly, as if waiting for him to amend his words, to tell her that it was some horrible joke. but as they gazed at one another, tawnyrose watched realization dawn upon softglow, who took a step back from tawnyrose. "you don't think...?" he began, only to trail off, and it struck tawnyrose in that instant that softglow cared deeply about her kits. though they had never been the best of friends, though they had never seen eye to eye and tawnyrose berated softglow more often than not, he cared about lightkit, bramblekit, and hawthornkit as though they were his own, beyond a charade for the clan to believe. in his moment of disbelief, he looked to tawnyrose. "are you sure she's not with quillpaw?" he asked, and tawnyrose looked up just as the thorn reappeared. there was anxiety written all over his face, and she made to call out to him, but pythoneyes came up to the king and queen in the same moment. "excuse me, tawnyrose, softglow," the knight said politely. just as with quillpaw, it was easy to see worry etched deeply into pythoneyes' expression. "i just wanted to see if you had heard any word from bluetcrest. it's getting late and if it's just him and sagecloud out there alone... well, it's quite dark, especially if there is flooding." when softglow and tawnyrose exchanged a sideways glance, pythoneyes gazed at them with wide eyes. "you haven't?" instead, tawnyrose sniffed and flicked her ear dismissively. "we're currently considering our options. bluetcrest and sagecloud are both very capable. if we decide to send out a search party, you'll be the first to know, pythoneyes." it was clear that the knight wasn't pleased, though he knew when to hold his tongue. he moved away, though not far, and tawnyrose squared her shoulders as she looked back to softglow. "sagecloud, too?" she asked. "we need to do a sweep, to make sure that everyone else is accounted for." "it can't be a coincidence that sagecloud is missing too, can it?" softglow asked, and tawnyrose hissed quietly. "he's here. he and spencer are here. they're accounted for," tawnyrose said, and they both knew she was right. sure enough, spencer and erasmus had been part of the party when they all arrived at camp. "and no one can know that lightkit's missing. not yet. have merlinsong do a head count, tell him to say that he's checking for any injuries or sickness from the long day, or whatever he has to say to make sure everyone else is here." as tawnyrose spoke in quiet tones, softglow nodded, swallowing thickly. "what are you going to do?" he asked, not missing the unfamiliar urgency that lit tawnyrose's eyes. never before had he seen her truly afraid, and it was not a look that suited the poised queen. but tawnyrose waved softglow away. "i need to talk to someone else," she said simply, gesturing the king away. for once, he trusted her, turning away to find the herbalist as she bid him. at the same time, tawnyrose finally set her sights on quillpaw, who straightened upon her approach. tawnyrose was aware of stagpaw, dewpaw, and seedpaw's eyes on her, though only quillpaw mattered to her in that moment. quillpaw, who had always been a friend to lightkit. quillpaw, who had promised to never leave her side. quillpaw, who had always held true to his word to protect the future queen of highgarden. "can we talk for a moment?" tawnyrose asked, and she could see that quillpaw knew what she was asking. she saw the fear in his eyes, but the strength as he nodded and followed the queen out of earshot. before tawnyrose had the chance to question him, however, quillpaw bowed his head. "i don't know where she is, i've been looking everywhere for her," he said. "we were all playing during the trip, and she was with me. and then while we were hiding by yewbloom, we heard spencer mention something about checking for flooding. lightkit wanted to ask spence about going to look for it, too, but i told her it was too dangerous. i thought she was beside me, but the next time i turned around, she was gone, and i can't find her anywhere." it all came from quillpaw in a rush, as it finally burst from his mouth. tawnyrose closed her eyes tightly, breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth before she looked at quillpaw again. "quillpaw, it's alright. we're going to find her," she told him. "but right now, i need you to tell me about where we were when you last saw lightkit, alright, and anything else that was happening around you, okay?" by the time tawnyrose and softglow came back together, the moon was high in the sky. there was still no sign of bluetcrest, sagecloud, or lightkit, and tawnyrose felt a tightness take hold of her chest. "merlinsong said they were the only three missing. everyone else is in camp," softglow said, and tawnyrose gazed at him for a long moment. there was no emotion in her expression. not the distant aloofness that softglow was used to; it was like she had been washed clean, a blank, empty slate. "softglow, please, take out a patrol. don't tell them it's a search party. say you're going to check on the flooding. i... i have a bad feeling about this," tawnyrose said, and softglow swallowed down the lump in his throat. he wished he could say that he didn't feel the same, but he felt increasingly hollow. "do you think they might have gotten caught in a flood?" he asked. tawnyrose tipped her head up towards the sky, where the bright moon washed out the stars. "i don't know," the queen answered honestly.
✦
the patrol wasn't particularly large as they traveled back the way they had come. the closer they got to the spot where tawnyrose directed them, however, the quieter they grew, as they all held their breath in anticipation. for softglow, it was for the hope that there wasn't any flooding. he hoped that they would find the ground dry and lightkit lost and tired, but safe. for hurricanejaw, privetears, iguanaspots, riverfoam, hornetshade, and otterfur, it was a hope that there hadn't been too much damage or anything concerning so they could all return back to camp soon to get some sleep. it was late, and by the time softglow slowed their pace, the moon had already begun to inch down from its precipice. for much of the patrol, softglow stuck to his place at the front as he led with a sense of quiet determination. otterfur and hornetshade talked among themselves, though iguanaspots didn't hesitate to bounce back and forth between them and the coversation between privetears and riverfoam, injecting wherever she so pleased. it was only after a long time of walking that softglow realized that hurricanejaw was padding at his side, and the king shot the knight a sideways glance. "you're not usually so quiet," hurricanejaw commented. behind them, privetears leaned against riverfoam as they walked, and iguanaspots laughed loudly when hornetshade nearly tripped over a loose stone. "i know it's late and we're all tired but i thought you'd be in good spirits, softglow," hurricanejaw said. "i just want to see what's there for us to find," softglow said. at that, hurricanejaw's ears twitched. "you think we'll find something?" he asked. "if there's something to be found," softglow answered curtly. "then i think we'll be the ones to find it." he could feel hurricanejaw's gaze boring into the side of his head, and softglow finally glanced in his direction. "i'm sorry, that was unkind. i just... i'll be happier when we're on our way back, i'm sure," softglow said, and hurricanejaw hummed. "you know, you're starting to sound like merlinsong, talking like that. all riddles and all," the knight said, letting out a kind chuckle. and softglow wanted nothing more than to laugh with him, but there was no shaking the weight on his shoulders and the ice that remained lodged in his throat. and, sure enough, it was only a matter of time until privetears stiffened from where she had gone ahead to scout. "is that... blood?" she asked, and the word sent a shockwave through softglow. he felt himself sway on his paws. as soon as it had been said, it seemed as though the scent surrounded the patrol. otterfur and hornetshade stood together, bristling, and iguanaspots' eyes flashed dangerously. hurricanejaw and riverfoam joined softglow as he met privetears, who pointed further into the treeline, closer to the groveclan border. "smell's like it's coming from that direction. a lot of it, too." silently, the patrol pressed on, but they didn't have to search or travel much further until they saw the scene before them. the found bluetcrest first, where he was sprawled on his side. dried blood coated into his chest fur. nearby, sagecloud was slumped, and her face was bloodied. deep gashes marred the entire left side of her face, and softglow felt his stomach churn. it was hurricanejaw who padded forward, first to bluetcrest, then to sagecloud. "they're both alive," he announced, and softglow immediately sent a blessing to the gods. "they're still hanging on, barely but... we need to get them back to camp." without pausing, softglow looked to iguanaspots. "go," he told her. "tell tawnyrose and bluetcrest to be ready. otterfur, i need you, hornetshade, privetears, and riverfoam to get them back to camp. hurricanejaw, you're with me. i want to see if we can figure out what did this." immediately, the cats sprung into action without any further hesitation. as they set themselves to work, softglow pressed on, positive that he would not like what he found. he was only aware of hurricanejaw's breathing, of the weight of his steps, but there was no more conversation. there, directly on the groveclan border, softglow found who he had been looking for. with bluetcrest and sagecloud being carried back to highgarden, softglow stood over the body of his daughter who was also not his daughter. "hurricanejaw," softglow finally managed to choke out. "how is it possible that this has happened? could this actually be real?" lightkit's flank didn't rise with breath; she didn't twitch. softglow heard hurricanejaw shift at his side, though he couldn't look away from the fallen heir to highgarden. "how could someone do this?" because there was no mistaking the pattern of claw markings in her pelt, the killing blows that ended her short life. there was no missing the thick scent of groveclan, that clung to his daughter's fur, mingling with bluetcrest and sagecloud's blood and the scent of their fear. he knew what it meant, what would happen as a result, and he knew that hurricanejaw did too. as soon as highgarden saw their heir's body, it would mark the beginning of the end. though the moon was lowering in the sky, lightkit would never see the sunrise as sunlight broke over the treetops. and it was that thought that made softglow finally break. he wept for all of the sunrises that she should have seen and shared. he wept for the days she would never know, for all of the days that he wouldn't be able to share with her. he wept and wept and wept for the queen who should have been.
✦
when tawnyrose considered what day had been the worst of her life, she always thought of the day of the flood. it had gone by so quickly, even in hindsight, as the clan woke before dawn to water rushing through their dens. it swept away the mossy bedding and the cries of their loved ones. by the time tawnyrose realized what had been happening, she too had been carried away. it all moved too quickly for her to comprehend, not until after, when she stood over the bodies of her mother and sister and realized that she was entirely alone. for a long time, that was what tawnyrose thought tragedy looked like always. it was always the feeling of being washed out of her nest and whisked out of her home as her clanmates struggles to stay afloat; tragedy was the feeling of being knocked against a rock at the bottom of the riverbed, tossed and whipped by the rapids and wild currents. she thought that it always moved quickly, until it washed over her that tragedies sometimes had the chance to creep up behind her. instead of the rush of water, it could also be the feeling of floating suspended underwater, when time seemed to slow to a stop. it pervaded every nook and cranny in her mind, filling in her ears and nose, pouring into her mouth until all she could taste, all she could hear, all should could know was that she had failed. she had been too late. she felt numb in the feeling of free-falling, as if she was waiting for the impact to come. and when it did, it left her hunched over, unable to even make a noise as merlinsong hurried from his den and the other roses and knights began to emerge from the commotion. even in the worst-case scenario, tawnyrose had never considered the sight of bluetcrest's lying prone in merlinsong's den as the herbalist tried to stem the bleeding from long, deep gashes across his chest, nor could she have anticipated merlinsong's warning that sagecloud would likely never be able to see out of her left eye again. above it all, she never could have imagined, even her worst nightmares, the sight of her clan sitting a vigil for her only daughter. it was enough to make tawnyrose retch as she saw the way pythoneyes sat by bluetcrest's side the entire night, helping merlinsong and spencer in any way he could. even with adenium and smokemane's help, it took all night until merlinsong finally sat back on his haunches and announced that their fate rested with the gods. in the moment, tawnyrose wanted to beg and plead - please, isn't there anything else you could do? - but she felt torn. her best friend toed the line between the ground and the gods, her daughter was dead in the middle of the clearing, and she heard the whispers echo through the highgarden camp with the single question of: who could have done this? indeed, all of highgarden had been quick to wake up, as if drawn to the scent of blood. there was a crackle of anger that struck like lightning, energy coming up from the ground and into tawnyrose's very paws. it hugged her grief, mingling into emotion that she found herself unable to properly articulate. the night breeze was warm against her cheek, as if a gentle caress, but it offered no comfort. she felt as though she was wound tight, like bunching her muscles before pouncing on a mouse. she felt full with grief, full with anger, and the distinct wish to reverse time, to hold her daughter even closer and tell her how much she loved her and how she would never let her go. then reality intruded again as tawnyrose watched eyes flash from the shadows as highgarden sat vigil and grieved, and she wanted to sob. she wanted to lean against bluetcrest and wail for lightkit. she wanted nothing more than to scream to the sky and ask the gods how they let it happen again, to ask them why they were always so willing and able to rip her happiness away from her. she wanted to scream, and she wanted revenge on whoever thought they could take her daughter's life away from her. yewbloom and softglow stayed close to the heir's side. yewbloom's cries quieted closer to dawn, as wolverinesnap whispered gentle words of comfort into the prince's ear, and softglow stared off into the distance. according to hurricanejaw, softglow had fallen silent after they found lightkit and hadn't said a word since then, not even when merlinsong tried to prompt him. thankfully, flickersky, ayalla, and ferretwhisker kept the kits and younger thorns in the nursery, and tawnyrose felt the distinct dread of when she would have to explain what had happened to bramblekit and hawthornkit. she thought it might be easier to explain it to them if she knew what happened. but, it seemed that the clan had also concluded that as well, tawnyrose realized when birchflame finally appeared from the shadows. "the patrol said there was groveclan scent all over the scene," birchflame said without any need for pretense. his voice was terse, pulled taunt and ready to snap at any moment. with his shoulders drawn and squared, his pelt bristling, he looked as angry as tawnyrose felt. there was a hurt in his eyes as well, like a wound left to fester, and tawnyrose knew that he was grieving just as much as she was. lightkit was the daughter he had never been able to claim and love as a father, and she was sure that he felt that he had let their kit down. "hurricanejaw himself said that groveclan scent was everywhere. what are we going to do about this?" it was the very question tawnyrose had been asking herself as well. tawnyrose had never been deaf to the way whispers traveled around the clan, how her cats spoke over the clan they shared a border with. ever since juniperstorm came to the heart of highgarden, it was clear that her cats were disgruntled by the nerve of the groveclan warrior. in truth, the rational part of tawnyrose had to question if badgerstar and groveclan really were capable of killing lightkit in such a heartless manner, though the stronger part of her, in that moment, decided that it made sense. lightkit's death was a message from groveclan that they knew about highgarden harboring erasmus, and they had decided to take their revenge. a leader's kit for a leader's kit. as she looked around the clearing, to where yewbloom leaned against wolverinesnap's shoulder, to where softglow stared at the first light of dawn peeking above the treetops, from sandstrike and privetears watching the camp's entrance as if expecting a groveclan patrol at any moment, to the way hornetshade paced the length of the grass on the far side of the clearing, it was clear that highgarden was unwell. her clan had already decided that groveclan was to blame, and tawnyrose inhaled deeply. in her gut, she felt her anger simmer and boil with the knowledge of all that had been taken from her. when she lost her parents and siblings, tawnyrose couldn't fight the flood waters. however, she thought of lightkit, bluetcrest, and sagecloud, and found that she was presented with a new enemy who she could fight. when she met birchflame's eyes, she saw when he noticed the anger that came to rise. it was a hot, burning rage, and he flicked his tail expectantly. "she was our heir. we all loved her," he said, raising his voice. tawnyrose felt eyes turn as birchflame's voice caught their attention. "let us fight for our heir. we can't let them get away with this." through it all, tawnyrose wished that bluetcrest was at her side. instead, she found softglow's blue eyes from where he sat to watch over lightkit on her travel to join the gods. "whoever did this needs to pay the price," the king said, his tone hollow with grief. before tawnyrose had the chance to respond, a dark shadow slipped into the pale light of dawn and erasmus stood tall over his clanmates. "is it true that groveclan scent was found? then we know who did this," he said. tawnyrose looked back to softglow, but the king had dropped his head, and she realized that she stood alone in that moment. merlinsong and bluetcrest weren't able to help her, and softglow couldn't. only she held the power to send her clan to war, and it was clear that they were happy to rally around erasmus, clinging to the thought of an outside enemy just on the other side of the border. "it's true," iguanaspots chimed in, and the young rose lashed her tail. "if they attacked once, they'll attack again," tulipstream mused, and maplelily nodded along with her friend's words. "they attacked a kit and two cats so viciously. they have no honor, and there's no telling what they could do next." it was clear that she thought of her own kits, as stagpaw raised his chin deliberately. "we can't give them the chance to attack again. they can't think that they can take from highgarden and not have to face the consequences," arcticblink said, looking directly to tawnyrose, who nodded at the knight. the lithe tom's tail fluffed out. "highgarden is not to blame for their past crimes. and now they've made it personal. they think they're entitled to us, but they're not." "let us fight for you, our queen," birchflame said, turning to tawnyrose. the energy crackled in the air above them, and tawnyrose gazed out among her knights and roses, who looked back in turn with her anger reflecting back at her. it was clear that they had all loved lightkit, even if not as her mother. whoever killed lightkit had taken their hope for a bright future. the light had been extinguished from highgarden as they were attacked on their own territory, and they wanted to take it back. tawnyrose looked from softglow, to erasmus, to birchflame, and finally to yewbloom, who looked up to his sister with hardened determination in his gaze. "highgarden," tawnyrose began, stepping away from birchflame and into the middle of the clearing. "they have taken a life from us today and tried to take more. i hear you, and i agree, they cannot get away with this. the dawn brings us the light we've been missing tonight. for lightkit, let's make sure that her life is not forgotten. they don't know the power of highgarden, so let's show them, now." the cheers that erupted from her clan were for lightkit, sent out to the sky, meant to rattle the trees and challenge the gods themselves. when tawnyrose looked to softglow again, the king merely tucked his chin on his paws and he stared at lightkit's body. at the same time, hornetshade shot otterfur and warblercry a concerned look, which they returned. with a flick of otterfur's ear, the trio ducked behind the nearest den, out of sight when the rest of the clan converged to hear tawnyrose's plan. hornetshade trembled, and warblercry tucked herself against his side as if to steady him and grant him strength. "groveclan didn't do this," hornetshade whispered. "they're going to hurt them i need to go and warn them," hornetshade said, but otterfur shook his head quickly. "you'll do nothing of the sort. you need to stay here and follow tawnyrose's orders," otterfur instructed them. "tawnyrose knows that you have friends in groveclan, and she'll notice if you've gone missing. she can't think you've chosen them over highgarden." "but -" "no," otterfur said sharply, and hornetshade finally clamped his mouth shut. he tucked his nose into warblercry's neck. "i'll go to groveclan. i'll slip away from the patrol, and one of you will cover for me. i'll move faster on my own and you know some of groveclan's territory, better than anyone else in highgarden," otterfur said, directing his attention to warblercry, who swallowed thickly. "only once, and it wasn't much," she said, but otterfur shrugged. "that's more than any other cat here. you get me there, and you leave me to talk to them." when the pair stared at him with wide eyes, otterfur blew out a sigh. "we don't have much time, okay? i've heard about badgerstar before. i think he'll listen. warblercry, tell me everything, quickly."
✦
by the time the sun peeked over the treetops, two patrols had already gone out, and hornetshade caught otterfur's eye as the older tom padded after hurricanejaw. their orders were simple: find groveclan patrols and attack them. it was to bide time until tawnyrose led the biggest highgarden force directly to the heart of groveclan, to confront badgerstar about lightkit's murder and the attack on bluetcrest and sagecloud. from where mapleshadow paced in front of her own gathered patrol, hornetshade had eyes only on erasmus. when the patrols were divided up, hornetshade knew that erasmus hadn't volunteered to join the largest force. no, he was too big, too strong and skilled to be placed on the peripherals. with birchflame and erasmus, hornetshade knew that the attack on the groveclan camp was serious, and tawnyrose meant for more than a warning strike. this was a blow for a war, possibly one that would only end when she felt that she had taken out all of her revenge on the one who had murdered her daughter and tried to kill her best friend. and the truth felt like a stone in hornetshade's stomach, weighing him down. by dawn, he watched as warblercry walked with betonypetal and the rest of the patrol sent to the far northest, where the highgarden border intersected with groveclan and ridgeclan. when he watched the tip of her tail disappear from sight, he felt indescribably torn. above all else, hornetshade always wanted to be loyal to highgarden. he thought of tigergaze's laugh, the sparkle in warblercry's eyes when she was excited, the way iguanaspots had always been one of his best friends, right from the moment they met, and how dippernose had taught him everything he knew. he thought of the kits in the nursery, from the way tornadokit and tsunamikit, though they didn't yet come up to his shoulder, still had a way of making their presences known. he thought of the older knights and roses, and his friends that he had trained with and come to know as his own family. and, indeed, he hated to think that the ranks could have been broken, that one of their own could have killed lightkit. but he also thought of the groveclan cats he knew. he thought of pinefeather, of juniperstorm, and the way they spoke of badgerstar. he thought of warblercry, the way she came back from visiting groveclan with a hollow look, as if she had been scooped empty from the knowledge she was granted and the stories she was told. he thought of her now, being forced to fight for a cause she knew was wrong, against experienced groveclan warriors who would be so surprised, so scared, so determined to protect their own loved ones and home. hornetshade felt nauseous at the very thought that warblercry might be hurt. but, above all else, he thought of midnightstream. even after so many moons, even after hornetshade told himself again, and again, and again that he meant nothing to midnightstream, it all always came back to him. he thought of the gentle tones in his voice, the way his fur ruffled with the gentle breeze, and how much hornetshade missed those days. he missed the carefree feeling with midnightstream, when he felt like he was floating instead of drowning. the tides of the present buffeted at hornetshade, pulling him in different directions, and he could only pray to whatever god might listen to him that midnightstream would be safe. between his loyalty to his clan, his fondness for warblercry, his desire to be right, and his feelings for midnightstream, hornetshade felt spread impossibly thin. and he considered all of this as he followed privetears, maplelily, mapleshadow, iguanaspots, and wolverinesnap out of camp and towards rose lake and beyond. once, the sound of the waterfall that set the border between groveclan and highgarden had been familiar and comforting to hornetshade. he once had associated it with a feeling of home and belonging, like he was finally where he supposed to be. but that was before, before they grew apart, before they had grown up, before there was the careful whisper of quiet pawsteps and uneven breathing as the highgarden patrol pushed ahead, beyond the scent markings that divided their territories, right over into groveclan land. at hornetshade's side, iguanaspots lifted her nose to take in the scents, and mapleshadow glanced back from the front of the group. "the scent's faded here," she noted, exchanging a glance with wolverinejaw as the lithe knight frowned in her direction. "that could mean a patrol is due to come this way," maplelily pointed out when she rounded to meet them. "we could walk along the border and stay hidden. we're downwind now, so we might have a good chance of finding a patrol." she looked first to mapleshadow for her opinion, but the sleek tortoiseshell shrugged her shoulders. by the time she looked back to wolverinesnap, the knight was staring off into the trees, but he flicked his tail and swiveled his ears. "if we go closer to the waterfall, we'll have a bit more cover, and the sound could block us out. they won't hear us coming." with that, it was decided. hornetshade couched beside iguanaspots and mapleshadow while maplelily, privetears, and wolverinesnap crouched among the bushes opposite them. the spray from the waterfall began to soak hornetshade's pelt by the time voices began to carry on the wind, easy and carefree. sure enough, there was no mistaking groveclan scent approaching, thickening the air by the moment, but there was one scent in particular that caught hornetshade's attention and gave him the immediate desire to run, to flee, to scream a warning to tell the patrol that they weren't safe. but hornetshade felt frozen in place as the realization struck him with exactly what he needed to do. he felt iguanaspots as she shifted, bunching her muscles, and hornetshade could make out the slightest rustle in the bushes where the others were hiding. he heard one of the groveclan cats comment that perhaps it was prey in the bush, but they didn't have a chance to get any closer. just as the first groveclan cat came into view, mapleshadow lifted her tail and dug her claws into the dirt. "highgarden! attack!" mapleshadow's voice lifted to the air, and hornetshade moved only by instinct. iguanaspots had always been faster to find her paws, and she launched out of hiding not a heartbeat after mapleshadow. by the time hornetshade emerged, it was to the sight of his clans attacking the groveclan patrol. mapleshadow wrestled with the patrol's leader, a black and white molly who yowled loudly as they exchanged blows. wolverinesnap let out a vicious snarl when a ruddy tom scratched down his side, but wolverinesnap twisted away before pouncing, bowling the other tom over into the dirt, just in time for iguanaspots to race past him to collide with a laperm molly who tried to pull wolverinesnap off of her clanmate. for a long moment, it was all hornetshade could do to stare at the knot of fighting cats. maplelily hefted a paw at tabby molly, and wolverinesnap's pelt already showed crimson where he had been hurt. though they had been taken entirely unawares, even though hornetshade could smell their shock and fear and hear a shouted question from one of the groveclan cats, asking what are you doing? why are you attacking us?, he knew that they were prepared to fight for their lives. and, through it all, privetears' shout caught hornetshade's attention as she ducked a blow from another groveclan warrior, wrenching free with a pointed hiss. "what are you doing, hornetshade?" privetears called to him. "attack!" but his legs felt like stone, weighing him down to the ground, entirely unmovable. more shouts followed, as the two patrols shouted among themselves, seeking to be heard. they swung claws and snapped sharp teeth, but hornetshade felt a chill run down his spine at the sensation of eyes boring into his pelt, and he looked up to see the familiar pair of eyes staring at him. it had been seasons since they had been close enough to touch, let alone had spoken. moons earlier, hornetshade wanted nothing more than to bury his nose in midnightstream's shoulder and forget the world. now, it felt as though his blood had turned to ice. all of their afternoons chattering, and their time as best friends felt so long ago, as if it was a different lifetime. hornetshade supposed that it was, after all. it was only when there was a flash of fur in the corner of his eye, headed for midnightstream, that hornetshade acted. time ran in slow motion, more than enough time for hornetshade to consider what was happening. he would have known iguanaspots' pelt anywhere, he knew her movements nearly as well as his own. they had been friends since their arrival in highgarden, she had always been there for him. she knew him better than tigergaze, had always been more in-tune with his emotions than warblercry. iguanaspots was his best friend, but as soon as he heard her shout for him to move, to attack, he knew what had to be done. in one deft, fluid, motion, hornetshade spun, dropping his shoulder. just as iguanaspots moved to brush past him on her path to midnightstream, hornetshade rammed into her sideways, carried by the momentum of his own movement. he knew, immediately, that he hit her hard, and it sent iguanaspots off of her paws. she let out a surprised cry, but hornetshade swallowed thickly and looked to midnightstream, finally finding his words. "i'm sorry," he said softly, padding closer towards his oldest friend. he saw iguanaspots find her paws out of the corner of his eye, and sent a momentary prayer to the gods that she hadn't been seriously hurt. "you need to get back to your camp. erasmus is here," he said. he saw the moment it all registered in midnightstream's eyes. he saw the flash of pain, the hurt that cut deeper than any claws could pierce. "tawnyrose thinks groveclan murdered a kit. she's going to attack the camp, you need to go." "juniperstorm," midnightstream whispered. "strongshine." his voice was raw with pain. "you need to go to them," hornetshade said, aware of the fighting nearby. the cats continued to shout and snarl, to fight for their lives and the life they thought had been taken. but midnightstream shook his head viciously. "no!" midnightstream screamed, loud enough for the trees to tremble from the force of his pain. "not again!" hornetshade dared to take a step closer. "please," he begged. "my clan doesn't know about him. you need to warn them before tawnyrose gets there. you'll have a head start. please, go." sure enough, it was relief that coursed though hornetshade when midnightstream finally turned and raced into the trees, and hornetshade gave chase. or, rather, raced after him. "don't get in the way, hornetshade," midnightstream called over his shoulder. "i'm not losing anyone else." already, the sounds of battle were fading, and hornetshade knew that he couldn't go with midnightstream. as wrong as it was, his clanmates depended on him, and he had made sure that midnightstream was out of immediate danger. hornetshade's paws began to slow. "i know," hornetshade shouted after him. "i was going to tell you to be safe, midnightstream." he slowed to a stop and watched after his oldest friend as midnightstream weaved expertly through the dense forest. hornetshade hoped that he had been given enough of a headstart, and he watched until midnightstream disappeared from sight. he breathed in deeply through his nose, then he turned and headed back towards the fighting with a heavy heart.
in all of his moons, otterfur couldn't remember a time when he ran faster. he could have sworn that he flying, if not for the way his paws felt rubbed raw, if not for the strain as his muscles screamed for him to stop. but otterfu didn't have a choice. otterfu saw the way rage glistened in their eyes, he saw the way they bristled, and he saw his past playing out before his eyes yet again. he had seen too many cats fall prey to their emotions in the past, and he knew what it did to them. when he had been chased out of bearclan, otterfur told himself over and over again that it was over. that he would never join another clan, because he saw what living in a group could do when one cat became irrational and lost control. but then merlinsong saved him from walking out onto the frozen lake. he made friends, as hurricanejaw and sagecloud accepted him seamlessly as one of their own. he became used to the feeling of security, and he wasn't ready to see highgarden crumble. not now, otterfur thought to himself. not like this. he stumbled, just once, over a twist of gnarled tree roots, but he didn't fall. he maintained his balance and pushed on. in several areas, low-hanging tree branches whipped at him, and thorns snagged at his pelt, but the pain meant nothing to otterfur. in the moment, he had a mission. the sight of lightkit's body in the middle of the highgarden camp made his heart clench. she could have been the daughter of any cat. she could have been any kit out of so many who lived in a clan. she could have been his own sons, she could have been one of badgerstar's kits. she could have been hornetshade, warblercry, tanagercall, juniperstorm, or any of the young cats that otterfur felt an affinity toward over the past several moons. and yet she was none of them. and yet she was all of them at the same time. no more, he thought to himself this needs to end. and if he was the only cat able to try to put a stop to the bloodshed before it started, then so be it. his breath came in short, ragged gasps as each step bought him deeper into groveclan territory. it hadn't been easy to get away from his patrol, and he knew that he would be missed by hurricanejaw at the very least. he also knew that this went against all that he had been working so hard to maintain: his loyalty to highgarden. all he wanted was to prove that he had changed, that he was loyal to his clan above all else, to prove to direfang and to himself that he wasn't the same cat he was then. he was going behind tawnyrose's back, and he had the full intention to tell badgerstar everything he knew. that highgarden was harboring his daughter's killer, that a patrol was on the way to launch a full-scale attack in revenge for a murder that they thought groveclan had committed. it went against his promised loyalty to highgarden. back then, he had turned against bearclan by choosing to follow and support viperstar. in choosing the side of a killer, he lost his family, his sense of belonging. again, he was betraying his clan, but it was different. it had to be different. he was, one again, risking his new sense of family in his new friends, but by going against a murderer. he so sorely hoped that his heart was right, that he had chosen the right path by ducking away from the patrol with only a searching glance to hurricanejaw. he had seen his friend's own flash of reluctance, and then otterfur had gone. he noticed that the ground under his paws was packed down more thoroughly, as if tread more often, and he slowed his pace. the scent of groveclan was thicker than in other areas, more powerful, and, at last, otterfur spotted the form of a cat pacing around the perimeter, easily recognizable as a guard in charge of the camp. though his breath still came in ragged, shallow gasps from his long race through groveclan territory, to try and reach badgerstar and his warriors before the highgaden patrols had attacked the unsuspecting groveclan cats and before tawnyrose was able to march her battle patrol into their camp, otterfur called out a sound of warning, announcing his arrival. unsurprisingly, it was not a cat that otterfur recognized, though they didn't appear hostile when they met otterfur. instead, they appeared opening curious and concerned. "hello, are you okay?" the cat asked. "i recognize your scent. highgarden, right? is everything okay over there?" otterfur didn't realize that he was shaking his head at first, but it was all he could managed to straighten up. "i urgently need to speak to badgerstar, please," he said, finally mustering a leveled breath. "i have very important news that he needs to know. it concerns the well-being of our clans."
✦
it was the rage that consumed tawnyrose, from her toes to her whiskers and the tips of her ears. as the day wore on, as the realization settled in, burrowing deep in her bones and leeching the warmth from her fur, she felt the anger grow and boil until it finally reached a fever pitch and she knew what had to be done. she tried to talk to softglow, but merlinsong had given him poppy seeds to soothe his apparent shock, and tawnyrose knew that merlinsong was too busy, too unaware of the political mind the discuss the matters of utmost importance. birchflame had asked what she was going to do, and tawnyrose meant it when she said that she - that they, all of them - would get revenge. it was easy to point across the border and say that groveclan had done this to them. it was easy to say that groveclan thought there were entitled enough, that they felt so self-righteous, that they believed themselves so powerful to stand above highgarden and call themselves better. and tawnyrose knew that it was easy for her clan to become enraged with so much going on. they were tired, they were still hungry and itching for action after a hard winter. had he been able, softglow might have warned tawnyrose that there was too much energy contained, he would have said that none of them were thinking rationally, and that it was important to actually consider the different ventures, to see the big picture and to assess it from all sides. she supposed that bluetcrest might have agreed with softglow, depending on the mood he was in. but softglow was in too much shock after carrying lightkit's body home, and bluetcrest hadn't woken up yet. tawnyrose saw the way birchflame paced the length of the camp and the way yewbloom sobbed into wolverinesnap's shoulder, and she had made her choice. she was alone in choosing, and it rested entirely on her shoulders. it was too late to turn back by the time her battle patrol reached the groveclan border. thoughout highgarden's time as allies with groveclan, the border had been quiet without any fighting or anything of importance to note. tawnyrose's own interactions were groveclan were minimal, just enough to establish a sense of exactly who she lived beside, just enough for them to know who she was. back then, hornetshade came into camp with wide eyes and words of how his new best friend was from groveclan. it made sense, then, that they become allies. over the seasons, tawnyrose never thought that they were cats with a mind for violence. if anything, she always thought of badgerstar and his warriors as especially peaceful. but, as tawnyrose paused at the precipice, right where their territories met, it was suddenly easy to imagine warriors melting from the shadows with glinting teeth and sharp eyes. she wondered what lightkit had thought as she died, whether it had been painful. had she understood what was happening, or had it been too late? had she tried to flee? had she screamed for her mother, who thought that she was safe and sound? tawnyrose squeezed her eyes shut and drew in a deep breath before she was able to turn to face her cats. in truth, tawnyrose knew that her clan was loyal and that they would fight with her to the end if they asked it of her. she knew that they were good cats and that she had earned their respect over the moons. they were skilled, they trained one another, ate with one another, and now they would fight one another, all on her word. no matter where they came from or what they had done in the past, they stood as a unified front, all loyal to her, and tawnyrose swallowed thickly around the lump in her throat. "highgarden, i am not sure what we will find across this border. it is likely that groveclan will be waiting for us, expecting us to strike a blow against them. we don't know exactly what their camp might look like, or how many of their cats are battle-ready. we don't know what badgerstar planned in store when his cats killed lightkit and tried to killed bluetcrest and sagecloud, and there's no telling what to expect next." as she spoke, tawnyrose allowed her gaze to travel across the group. she looked from spencer, who she had asked to come as a an acting herbalist in the middle of combat while merlinsong was busy treating bluetcrest and sagecloud, and he stood beside erasmus, who towered over the cats around him. she looked to birchflame, who didn't meet her eyes, but lashed his tail and curled his lip. she looked to direfang and riverfoam, from smallheart and swiftheart to kitechaser and charredbreeze, and on and on with names and faces around the rest of the patrol. only a few of the knights and roses had asked to remain in camp, to act as guards for the wounded and kits with the thorns. stagpaw himself promised that he wouldn't let anyone into the camp, and tawnyrose believed him. her thoughts went to bramblekit and hawthornkit, and she knew that they would be safe. the rest of her cats who weren't with her had been sent into separate patrols to intercept, attack, and hold off any groveclan patrols sent out from camp. it would limit the number of warriors in the groveclan camp and make sure that the battle patrol wasn't spotted. the side patrols gave tawnyrose the chance to gather most of her best fighters, those who she believed would make groveclan pay for their wrongs. after this, she decided, groveclan would know better than to cross highgarden again. "what i do know is that you are the strongest cats in all of the clans," tawnyrose continued. she looked to tigergaze and sunglow, from betonypetal and clovershine to foxspark and wolfhowl. "what i do know is that any cat who tries to hurt any of our clan will feel the wrath of highgarden. because we are stronger than they know, than they could ever believe. they don't know what we are capable of. but i do know that they will. i do know that we have been underestimated for far too long, and i know that it is time for all of the clans to know that highgarden is not so easily snuffed out. my daughter, your hei deserved a long life, in which she could have had the chance to rule better than i, better than any of my predecessors. but that chance was stolen from her." tawnyrose paced the length of the border. her agitation, her rage, continued to bubble, reaching a new height. "we cannot let her life be in vain. stand with me now, and let's show the world that highgarden is strong, and always growing stronger." shouts rose from the patrol, and tawnyrose dipped her head to her cats. "follow me." and with that, together, she led her patrol over the border, directly into groveclan territory. and there was no turning back. it seemed that the tangential patrols that tawnyrose sent out in the wake of her main battle patrol had managed to serve their purpose. as the group continued to push their way into unfamiliar territory, they weren't greeted by any groveclan patrol. in fact, the scent markings were weak, as if there hadn't been any groveclan cats in that direction. on more than one occasion, she thought she might have heard the distant battle cry rise through the air, though tawnyrose couldn't be entirely certain if it was real, her imagination, or her projection of what it must have sounded like when lightkit, bluetcrest, and sagecloud were attacked. she wondered if they had been given any warning at all. more than once, she hesitated and glanced back towards her own cats, to where erasmus padded alongside spencer, right with the rest. she thought of the darkness in his laugh and the haughty rise of his chin, but she told herself that this made the most sense. this made sense, and this was what had to be done. she told herself that there was no other way, and there was certainly no way that she could face her clan with hesitation. they wouldn't accept it. she was queen, she had to stick by her own words and maintain her stance. she wished that she wasn't alone at the head of the patrol, she so dearly wished for softglow's gentle caution and bluetcrest's spirited rationale. in the moment, either side would have served better than the fire lit within her, the same fire that held her paws steadfast and wafted smoke over her eyes. tawnyrose knew that she was blinded, and there was nothing to be done with it but press on until, at last, the shape of camp ways formed before her gaze. she paused and waved her tail in a signal. there was the soft whisper of paws in the grass as the patrol came to a halt. at tawnyrose's signal, foxspark slipped from one flank, and betonypetal from the other. the two split off in opposite directions, scouting in either direction. a gentle breeze stirred tawnyrose's fur and rustled the tree branches, but it was too quiet. when foxspark and betonypetal returned, each offering a shake of their head, tawnyrose looked back towards the groveclan camp. indeed, it was too quiet. "what are you waiting for?" birchflame whispered when he came up to tawnyrose's shoulder. the queen cut a glance in his direction. "it's quiet," she murmured, and birchflame sniffed thoughtfully. "that's good, isn't it?" he asked. "their patrols haven't come back yet. less warriors here." but tawnyrose could only stare at the camp walls. "perhaps." she shifted her paws again. "or it means they knew we were coming and they're waiting for us. an ambush for our ambush." birchflame's eyes flashed a vibrant green, but he kept his gaze trained on tawnyrose. "we can't turn back. and if they're waiting for us, that proves what they did. how else could they know?" "i'm not sure what troubles me more. that we could have been right, or that we were so blind to begin with." tawnyrose sighed finally and bobbed her tail in another signal. "keep the line tight, there's no telling what's on the other side." "i won't let them touch you," birchflame promised, and tawnyrose wrinkled her nose. "big words." at last, she made the first step forward, then another, and another. her clan was behind her, birchflame stuck close to her shoulder, and tawnyrose, for the first time, felt the rush of fear, of adrenaline, as the groveclan entrance rose before her eyes. just as the shadow rose over the patrol, tawnyrose lifted her chin and shout, loud enough for all to hear: "highgarden, attack!" and then the patrol broke through the entrance of groveclan's camp. tawnyrose had never been in a war before. as far back as her memory stretched, highgarden had always been very isolated, staying away from other clans. any passing rogue groups had been dealt with swiftly and without any mercy. tawnyrose had never been in a real fight before with other cats, who were capable of organizing themselves. any training had been exactly that - training. and it was training for a war she never could have imagined would come to fruition. she imagined cats crashing into each other, teeth snapping and claws glinting in the light. she imagined the shouts of her own cats as they fell into formation, fighting viciously to settle the score. she imagined the blur of pelts, the stains of blood soaking into the ground, the thud as bodies slammed together as they battled for victory, in which only one group would be able to stand tall and return to their families with the good news of everything that happened. there would be tales on both sides to tell how the day went, which kits would turn into play, fighting for the roles of the great cats who battered their enemies until they followed gave them the chance to escape and flee into the shadows to cower and lick their wounds. scars would be compared, the ties of alliance would fail, but it would all have been worth it in the end if it meant that lightkit hadn't died for nothing, that tawnyrose hadn't lost her own daughter by means of senseless violence. instead, tawnyrose found herself dumbfounded when the highgarden patrol entered the clearing, and it suddenly made sense why it had been so quiet. it appeared that the clearing had been emptied, save for a single line of cats who were waiting for the highgarden party. however, instead of having their claws unsheathed, backs arched and ready for battle, the groveclan cats merely stared as the highgarden cats filled the area in front of the entrance, their own gazes lit with confusion. tawnyrose was unfamiliar with majority of the groveclan cats, beyond the slight flashes of fur during patrols and a few brief conversations over the seasons. but there was no missing the legendary groveclan leader and deputy as tawnyrose locked eyes with them. "badgerstar," tawnyrose said coolly. "it looks like you've been expecting us. but i'm not here for an explanation of why your clan attacked my best friend and one of my senior roses, or why your clan killed my daughter. it's too late for that." badgerstar tipped his head to one side, as if assessing, and tawnyrose sank he claws into the soft dirt. "tawnyrose," he said, and his tone was warm and soothing. strangely, tawnyrose thought that it sounded sincere and trustworthy. "we don't want to fight you or your clan. but we want you to know that you've been lied to and manipulated." tawnyrose's glance flicked to birchflame who, true to his word, hadn't left his queen's side. her gaze then traveled across the line of groveclan warriors. she recognized lionheart's regal posture and ginger fur, though the others were strangers to her. they all wore scars that marred their pelts, from the tabby who missed an eye, to a gray and white tom who bore his fair share of battle scars. each of their faces wore unmasked hostility and rage, though it took tawnyrose a long moment to realize that their anger was directed not at her, nor was it directed at her entire party. instead, tawnyrose had to glance back to where erasmus was standing, larger and broader than the rest of the patrol, for her to realize exactly who was the target, and she felt her fur begin to bristle. "your warrior found out about him, and you took it as enough of a challenge to attack my clan when they were outnumbered and defenseless, is that it?" she accused, though she hardly had enough time to fed and feel her growing anger before badgerstar shook his head. "i can assure you that groveclan did not hurt her," badgerstar said calmly. in all of the times that tawnyrose and badgerstar had crossed paths, she never once regarded the older tom as a solemn figure. usually, he was bright with laughter and energy, and his expression unnerved her. but erasmus' voice rose from the patrol behind her. "i'm a loyal knight of highgarden," the dark tom bellowed, and tawnyrose's ears swiveled. she thought of the first time she met erasmus, how his eyes lit with cruelty as he spoke of killing a groveclan kit, and, finally, the fog began to clear in front of tawnyrose's eyes, though she could see that the rest of her clan remained unaware. "would you really believe them over me?" erasmus asked, and tawnyrose could see that it was not meant as an appeal to her, but to the highgarden cats. beside erasmus, spencer trembled. "would you really believe those kit-killers over me?" before there was a chance to say anything, movement caught the corner of tawnyrose's eye as one of badgerstar's warriors stood from the line and took a step forward. at tawnyrose's side, birchflame let out a warning hiss, but the black and white tom didn't appear dissuaded when he looked over the highgarden party. "you're the kit-killer," the tom said, looking to tawnyrose when the queen caught his gaze. "i was a member of the kingdom as well. isn't that right, spencer?" when eyes turned towards the skinny herbalist, a ripple of whispers broke through the ranks, and tawnyrose took her chance to raise her voice. "spencer, speak," she ordered, and there was a brief moment when spencer looked to erasmus, who opened his mouth. if tawnyrose fully trusted her judgement in the moment, she could have sworn that she saw a flash of fear in erasmus's eyes. but she didn't give the larger tom the chance to say anything to spencer. again, she had the sense of deja vu, reaching back to their first meeting in her den so many moons earlier. "i'm asking you to speak, spencer, not him." she needed to know, and spencer finally stepped forward. the highgarden cats parted the way for him. "archie i... i didn't know you were still alive," spencer said. his whiskers twitched, and he made to look back at erasmus, but archie caught his attention again. "tell them, spencer. tell them about the kingdom. tell them about the injuries you saw. tell them about everything erasmus said to you while i was injured and you were caring for me. i bet he made plans with you again, didn't he? he told you everything that he was going to do, didn't he?" "h-he -" spencer started, but he stuttered, too busy looking from archie, to tawnyrose, to erasmus. he trembled worse than ever. from fear, tawnyrose thought, or he was overwhelmed. or perhaps he was overwhelmed by his fear. his eyes were round and he shook. "archie, i-" "you left me to die," the tom said, but it wasn't an accusation. it rang true through the clearing, and tawnyrose heard another ripple of whispers pass though her cats. clovershine stepped between betonypetal and spencer, and tigergaze's ears were pinned to the back of his head, suddenly defensive. "tell them about how he forced you to leave, even though you wanted to stay to make sure that i would live, spencer." archie took another step forward, and this time birchflame didn't try to stop him. "i know you spencer, and i know how you love him. but i know that you know that this is wrong. tell them the truth." archie's one eye gleamed in the sunlight. "spencer, i know that you're good. but these are the wrong choices. you could make up for it now if you tell them the truth about everything." birchflame's fur was lying flat on his shoulders when he looked to archie, and tawnyrose blinked thoughtfully. instead, it was erasmus who spoke, hissing at archie. "he can't say that, because it didn't happen." erasmus' deep tones sounded strained, and he swung his head to look to spencer. "tell them," erasmus said. "tell them the truth," archie said, and tawnyrose saw the cracks begin to form. "tell them!" "tell them -" and then he shattered. "i can't!" spencer screamed. it was the loudest tawnyrose had ever heard his voice, and it was only when he broke. but it was clear that his words were directed towards his own mate, not archie, and tawnyrose narrowed her eyes. "i can't do that!" spencer screamed, and no one tried to stop him when he turned and ran directly out of the clearing, though tawnyrose acted by impulse alone. "tigergaze, kitechaser, don't let him get far. we'll need him here," she said, and she thanked the gods that they didn't hesitate to follow her orders. she then looked to erasmus, who stared with wide-eyes after where spencer had fled, and tawnyrose sniffed before looking back to badgerstar, archie, and the other groveclan cats. "can you prove it?" she asked. "can you prove that he's a liar?" "i found novella on our border with the kingdom," one of the other groveclan cats said. "erasmus drove her out of the kingdom and left her for dead." in turn, a black and white molly twisted, exposing a long scar along her flank, and tawnyrose heard one of her own cats gasp with surprise at the sight. "he told everyone in the kingdom that she had been kidnapped by groveclan," archie said. "and that was when the kingdom attacked groveclan in the middle of the night," the gray and white tom said. "and they stole our kits as revenge. they thought we took novella, so they wanted to even the score." tawnyrose blinked at the raw pain in the pretty calico's voice when the groveclan queen looked to badgerstar, but it was the one-eyed tabby who spoke after. "when we went to get them back, the kingdom gave their demands. but we rejected them," he said, and then all eyes turned to badgerstar when the leader shook his head, addressing tawnyrose directly. "and dante killed twilightkit. i had a life taken from me, and the rest of my warriors were lucky to make it out alive. but it was all because of his lies and his manipulation, which hurt all of us. and now he's hurt you," badgerstar. tawnyrose blinked the sharp sting of tears from her eyes, and she twisted to look to at her own patrol. by that point, it was clear that opinions had shifted. direfang's lip curled and riverfoam hissed pointedly at erasmus. "if you can say something to refute these claims, i suggest you do so now," tawnyrose said, but erasmus merely whirled on his heels, making a break in the same way that spencer had. however, he was not as lucky as spencer. charredbreeze stood firm in erasmus' path, and when he tried to swipe at her, to knock her aside, swiftheart and smallheart dropped to their friend's defense. they were no match for erasmus, but by the time that clovershine managed to bat at erasmus' muzzle, holding him back from escaping, there was a flash of red when birchflame knocked into erasmus sideways, knocking the massive tom off of his paws. they hit the ground with a thud and they rolled. for a moment, tawnyrose saw blood and fur, and she thought that she had lost another of her own, but birchflame wound up on top, pinning erasmus firmly into the dirt. clovershine following, helping birchflame pin erasmus' hind legs as the larger tom writhed, struggling to free himself, but it was no use. "hold him," tawnyrose commanded, her voice firm and resolute. tawnyrose padded forward to where birchflame held erasmus down, and she regarded the dark tom with a cold glance, her expression wiped clean of emotion. there was a gash on his cheek from where birchflame struck him, and when erasmus struggled, birchflame's claws dug in deeper until erasmus hissed. "i, tawnyrose, queen of highgarden, declare that you are, from this moment forward, to be held and tried for the murder of lightkit, known as the heir of highgarden, the little queen, and the queen who should have been. you will be stripped of your rank and held in highgarden. you will be given a trial to determine your guilt, and you will have the chance to appeal to the clan to try and prove your innocence," tawnyrose said, sniffing delicately. "i suggest you prepare a good defense, erasmus." with that, tawnyrose turned to groveclan and the rest of her cats. "i need volunteers to go and fetch the other patrols. tell them that our quarrel is not with groveclan, and it never has been," she said. then, at last, tawnyrose turned to badgerstar and dipped her head. "badgerstar, i offer my sincerest of apologies. after so many moons of our alliance, it was wrong for me to believe that you and your clan could have done this. i hope you can accept my apology." as she spoke, tawnyrose's vision fogged with tears. when the first splattered against the ground, it was as though the floods began, and tawnyrose found herself leaning against badgerstar's shoulder as the olde leader steered her off to the side and coaxed her. "you're hurt, and you're hurting, tawnyrose," badgerstar murmured to her. "and that's okay, because i felt the hurt when i lost my daughter, too." tawnyrose's shoulders shook when she sobbed openly for all that she had lost. "i miss her," tawnyrose sobbed. "she took a part of me, and he took everything from her. where can i possibly go from here?" "you don't go anywhere," badgerstar murmured softly. "you carry on, and know that she's with you." tawnyrose broke, and it was badgerstar who allowed her to weep, who stayed when she needed someone. and, when it was over and tawnyrose returned to herself, the hollow feeling hadn't gone away, not at all, but she felt a little less broken.
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Sept 12, 2020 20:05:09 GMT -8
"why did you do it?" "why do you keep coming here?" "why did you kill her? why? she was just a kit, she -" there was a pause and a deep, shuddering inhale. "she was innocent." "is anyone ever innocent, tawnyrose?" he asked her, and the queen refused to turn her head away from him. she couldn't let him have another victory over her. "the day we met, we measured each other. i think you underestimated me, even though i told you exactly what you needed to know. all of this could have been avoided." he swished his tail against the ground, and tawnyrose forced herself to bend. if she didn't bend, she would break. and she wouldn't - couldn't - break in front of erasmus. "i would have been happy to move on, but spencer needed a place to stay. and he would've followed me to the ends of the earth if i kept on." "but that didn't mean that you had to kill her." "didn't it?" erasmus' yellow eyes reflected the dim moonlight that slipped between the brambles of the den over their heads. since highgarden had no wilted in their ranks, it made the most sense to keep erasmus confined there. "you threatened spencer. you threatened to turn us over to groveclan." "and you make it sound like groveclan would be a death sentence," tawnyrose said, digging her claws into the soft dirt. each night, she found herself leaving her den and crossing the camp to the where erasmus was being held. there were always guards on watch, sitting all through the days and nights to make sure that erasmus couldn't get away, not without fighting the guards off before they could raise the alarm. tawnyrose wished so badly that it was all a dream, that she could just wake up and find lightkit alive and well. she begged the gods to bring her daughter back, promising that she would do better, that she would be a better mother. but lightkit was gone, she knew it, and it was all she could do to meet erasmus and question him. in the beginning, he had been silent in response to her questions, but then he began to talk. tawnyrose couldn't tell if it was out of boredom, if he found some sense of amusement in watching a mother's search for answers, or if he genuinely wanted to talk to tawnyrose about his actions. but, as much as he began to speak, it was never enough. it was never the answer that tawnyrose wanted. "perhaps not, but what would badgerstar have done? there's too much damage from the past in that clan, they couldn't have exiled me. so they might have held me like this, like i am now," erasmus mused thoughtfully. "moons spent running, only to end up in the same place. makes me wonder if it was always meant to be like this. like destiny." "what happened wasn't fate," tawnyrose said. "she wasn't supposed to die." when erasmus said nothing futher, tawnyrose shook her head slowly. "you say that it's all been for spencer, but you saw how he was at groveclan. you broke him down, you put him in this position, and whatever happens to him next is because of you." she expected some hostility and backlash, but easmus appeared genuinely curious, his eyes narrowed to thoughtful slits. "and what will happen to him? are you going to lock him away, too?" "i have no reason to," tawnyrose said. "he doesn't have to answer for your crimes. only you do. merlinsong is willing to continue working with him, especially since he needed to help after all you did. this is your burden to bare. you did this, so you will pay the price. you do have a trial coming up, after all." at last, erasmus blew out a huff of laughter, though there was no humor in the hollow sound. "ah, yes, i'm preparing my defense. because you all want to hear me beg for my freedom and my life. you want me to beg for exile at best. let the shadow fly far away from here, so that i'm not your problem any longer." however, tawnyrose watched erasmus' expression tighten. "but i know that you wouldn't have me exiled." tawnyrose merely sniffed, not denying the statement. "you're too much of a risk. can't have you coming back on a quest for revenge." erasmus managed a somber half-smile at that. "need to protect your clan and the ally you were so ready to start a war with only days ago, of course. so it'll be death, then." "you'll have to be found guilty first," tawnyrose pointed out, and erasmus' mouth twitched humorlessly. "i've already been found guilty. remember? no one's innocent. so it'll be death. i just wonder who would carry out the punishment, or why you haven't already. you come in here every night. wouldn't it be so easy to kill me, tawnyrose?" erasmus' tone was low, tempting in its delivery. "you play a cold part, but we all saw that there's still a fire in you. and your cats love you, and they hate me. if you were to kill me, no one would question you." "spencer would." at the sound of his mate's name, erasmus hummed quietly. "perhaps, but he has no where else to go. he knows that." tawnyrose's ears pricked curiously. "don't you think of how upset he would be, though? he loved you, and he's done nothing to deserve so much pain that it would cause him. he's innocent... or is he?" there was a slight edge to her tone, and erasmus caught it, immediately bristling when he took notice. "he is innocent, he has nothing to do with any of this," erasmus growled, but tawnyrose merely blinked at him. "remember?" she echoed his tone. "no one's innocent, that's what you said." she thought that erasmus might strike her, that she might feel the same burn of pain as claws sliced through her fur. the same claws that killed her daughter, took sagecloud's eye, and nearly crippled bluetcrest. but no blow came. instead, tawnyrose watched erasmus stare over her shoulder, and she followed his glance until she made out the shadow standing in the mouth of the den. "tawnyrose?" softglow asked, and the queen back away from erasmus until she met softglow. it was clear that he was still blinking sleep from his eyes. "what are you doing in here?" he asked. "what does it look like?" tawnyrose asked, shooting erasmus a sideways glance, but the dark tom had turned away. his shoulders were hunched and he hung his head low, merely a mound of black fur cloaked in shadows. "what are you doing awake?" she asked. "ayalla woke up and heard voices from in here. she asked me to take a look," softglow said, and his eyes kept flickering between tawnyrose and erasmus. "would you actually kill him like this?" the king asked after a beat, and it was a question that caught tawnyrose off-guard with the realization that she didn't have an answer for him. instead, she nudged softglow towards the den's entrance and then outside. together they walked past the guards and tawnyrose led softglow back towards the nursery. softglow hesitated at the entrance, however, and he squinted at tawnyrose. "you're not like him," softglow said at last, and tawnyrose shrugged her heavy shoulders. "i think we're more similar than we are different," she answered, and this seemed to worry softglow, but tawnyrose merely flicked her ears. "go back to sleep, softglow, i'm going back to my nest. it's late." but softglow stepped into her path. "you could sleep in the nursery. i'm sure hawthornkit and bramblekit would appreciate it," he said, tawnyrose thought of the ghost that would follow her into the nursery, and she shook her head. "get some sleep, softglow," tawnyrose said, and she left the king to watch her cross the clearing alone while the lonely stars shone overhead.
though merlinsong had heard everything there was to hear about the confrontation in groveclan, he never spoke about it. he didn't ask about the scratches the highgarden knights and roses brought back after fighting with the groveclan patrols, he didn't mention about how the formerly-empty wilted's den had been turned into a guarded cell, nor did he mention the stories of the argument surrounding spencer and how he had to be brought back to highgarden by tawnyrose's command. in fact, all merlinsong said to spencer happened the night after everyone had returned to camp, and the herbalists were left alone as the only ones awake. to the sound of bluetcrest, sagecloud, and smokemane breathing in their nests, merlinsong merely sniffed the air and said: "if you want to leave again, i won't stop you and i won't raise the alarm. i won't make you stay here, but, if you do stay, i'd really appreciate your help because you make some of the best poultices i've ever seen." and when spencer was still there the next morning, it became an unspoken agreement between them, and they carried on as normal. even when many of the other highgarden cats appeared to avoid spencer at all costs, merlinsong appeared to not even notice the avoidance, opting instead to conveniently find a task for spencer that would remove him from the den for a little while, long enough for merlinsong to deal with the problem and push on. it helped even further that adenium continued to help out in the den every now and then, keeping the herbalists and their patients company. merlinsong caught the little molly eyeing spencer only once, in the very beginning following the proceedings, before she shrugged as if it was nothing of consequence, and she continued to help them sort herbs in the unbroken peace of the den. if anything, merlinsong decided that the politics of the hierarchy and the violence of what was and what might have been belonged outside of his realm. it didn't make for a good work environment and it didn't help his patients heal. it was one of the afternoons when merlinsong sent spencer out to look for moss and cobwebs that adenium offered to help merlinsong with tending to sagecloud and bluetcrest, who had slowly been recovering from their wounds. she walked several laps of the den with bluetcrest, matching the attendant's slow pace, his stride heavily hindered by the limp from where his hip had been greatly injured in the attack, and merlinsong settled across from sagecloud. the rose's face had been bloodied on the entire left side, and the scars that marred her skin weren't particularly pleasant to look at, but merlinsong didn't even flinch while he set about to changing the cobwebs. after she had regained consciousness, sagecloud hadn't exactly been entirely silent, though she was decidedly more somber than usual, and she regarded merlinsong through one glassy eye before she asked the question he had been waiting for. "so..." she said. "i guess i'll never have my full eyesight again, huh?" merlinsong carefully placed aside the bundle of cobwebs and settled back on his haunches. "you've always struck me as very perceptive and realistic, sagecloud," merlinsong said with a frown. "i wish i could tell you something different from what you already know." sagecloud's gaze lifted towards the ceiling of the den. "i knew," she said after a moment. "when i woke up and saw bluetcrest lying there, i felt so much pain, and i knew that it wasn't right. it was like i was off-balance, you know? like i knew that he was there, but i also couldn't tell exactly where." she blew out a long breath. "there was so much pain, like an itch i couldn't scratch. and it's still there, and part of me thinks that it'll be better if i just open my eye. as if i just have it closed, you know? but i can't." "it's going to be an adjustment," merlinsong said. "and i won't tell you that it's going to be easy. because i'm sure that it won't be, but i'm obligated to remind you that the whole clan is behind you, and everyone wants to see you get back on your paws so you can succeed again." sagecloud didn't say anything for some time, but she nodded slowly at last and drew in another long inhale. "i guess the best i can do is prove him wrong, you know? he thought he killed me, but i'll get back up. and who knows, maybe brindlepelt'll like scars," she said, and merlinsong mirrored the rose's tentative smile. however, the expression wavered when bluetcrest limped nearby with adenium at his side. most of the attendant's white chest was still plastered with herbs to ward off infection from the gashes that had been left behind from erasmus' claws. bluetcrest caught sagecloud's gaze and smiled weakly, clearly tired from only a short walk with a kit, and sagecloud looked back to merlinsong. "i really thought that he was dead," she whispered sullenly, her single eye round with lingering fear. "there was so much blood, and he was barely breathing and i didn't know what to do. because there was so much blood, and it looked horrible." she swallowed thickly and shut her eye tightly. "i think that was worse than the pain. the sight of him bleeding like that, i can't get it out of my head." "you did what you could," merlinsong said. "you used all of your strength to try and get him to safety, and we're all glad that you're both safe now." he knew that his words didn't soothe sagecloud, but the rose merely nodded her head once and lowered herself to lie in her nest. merlinsong took the cue to leave her to rest, just as adenium padded over to him. "bluetcrest said he was feeling tired and winded, so i told him to rest for a while and then he could try to stretch later if he wanted to," she said, and merlinsong grinned happily down at adenium. "very good," he said before clearing his throat. "i could actually use your help in the store for a moment, if you wouldn't mind?" together, they passed obsidianwing and smokemane, who were working on strengthening smokemane's limbs. merlinsong and adenium stopped by the pair long enough to watch as obsidianwing aided smokemane in her exercises, encouraging her and remaining patient when she wobbled a bit and had to take her time to process each thought and motion. indeed, it was a long process, and would continue to remain a long time, until smokemane was in better shape. she would never have the same mobility, agility, balance, or reaction time, but she was making progress each day as she continued to train with obsidianwing and sunglow. merlinsong praised the molly before leading adenium towards the back of the stores. as they began to sort out dried leaves and shriveled berries, merlinsong cleared his throat just as adenium spoke up: "there was something i wanted to say," adenium said, and merlinsong chuckled. "i had something to ask you as well, but, please, you go first," merlinsong said, and adenium shot him a sideways glance. "i think i know what you're going to ask, but... i've been giving it a lot of thought. i thought about what you said a few moons ago. you know, about protecting the clan and how knights and roses protect the clan differently from you and spencer and... i thought that i would ask to train with you but, the more i think about it, the less right it feels. does that make sense?" for a moment, merlinsong felt his throat tighten with disappointment, before he waved it away and nodded. adenium smiled tightly. "yeah. i think we all thought that highgarden was safe and there was nothing that could touch us. and i look around, and i see that everyone is glad to be alive, but there's still fear and the thing is... not everyone is alive." adenium paused, as if gathering her thoughts. "lightkit was nice, and she was my friend. and i thought about how you said that just because there hasn't been a fight doesn't mean that there won't be one. and i feel that now. and i'm scared too, because we all thought we were safe for so long, but we weren't, and maybe there's no way to make sure that we're always safe all of the time, and i want to help protect us out there, not just in here," she said, and merlinsong stared at the little tortoiseshell for a long moment before he nodded along with her words. "that's very observant of you," he said, and adenium smiled, catching the warmth in his tone. "but you should also know that there will always be a place for you here as well. you have talented here, and i could always use more help, if you've ever bored or want to take a break from your mentor and denmates..." he said with a teasing lilt. "then i'll know where to find you," adenium finished, beaming as she tucked herself against merlinsong's side. "thank you, and please know that i'll always come back to help. someone has to make sure this den isn't overrun with rotten berries." merlinsong's booming chuckle echoed around the storage and he nudged adenium's shoulder with his nose. "good, i'll make sure to save all of the tedious work for when you come back around." adenium rolled her eyes, but her gaze with bright with humor and she dipped her head. "and i promise that i'll complain about it a healthy amount." "i expect no less."
from her spot at the center of the camp, tawnyrose watched through half-lidded eyes as direfang and bassflow flanked erasmus on either side, leading the massive tom through the crowd of angered highgarden cats. there were many shouts and furious yowls from the crowd, and tawnyrose glanced once to softglow, who had turned his cheek to the sight of the dark cat that had murdered his adopted daughter. indeed, tawnyrose felt her own anger burn hotly in her stomach, but she forced herself to remain calm. based on the reactions of the rest of the clan, it was clear that too much of a reaction from tawnyrose would push the boundary from a trial to a complete execution. as much as tawnyrose wanted to see her daughter's killer pay the ultimate price, she knew better than to revert to savagery. her clan had already been willing to attack an innocent clan by her command, and she would not make such a mistake twice. she had to be rational, for her clan, for her own dignity, and for lightkit's memory. so, when erasmus stood before her, tawnyrose lifted her tail, effectively silencing the crowd with a single gesture. tawnyrose stepped forward and regarded erasmus, but kept her voice loud enough to be heard by the entire crowd. "erasmus, former knight of highgarden and member of the kingdom of shattered bones, you have been accused of aiding in the kidnapping of badgerstar's kits, plotting the murder of twilightkit, participating in the battle between groveclan and the kingdom of shattered bones, attempting to murder novella, inciting a war between groveclan and the kingdom of shattered bones, attempting to incite a war between groveclan and highgarden, attempting to murder bluetcrest and sagecloud, and murdering lightkit, the heir to highgarden, " tawnyrose said, allowing the list of crimes to be presented clearly. several more shouts rose from the gathered clan, with voices that the queen recognized as birchflame's, maplelily's, and dippernose's, though the yowls were quieted again with another lift of her tail. "if you would like to present a defense for theses charges, you may do so now." with that, tawnyrose stepped back from erasmus and settled, curling her tail around her paws. for a long moment, erasmus merely stared at tawnyrose, letting their gazes lock. there was so much unspoken between them in that moment, stretching back to the first time they met when erasmus and spencer first arrived. from the outset, there had been clear hostility between the pair, so many passive threats and aggressions that mounted to lead them to the very moment before them. just as when they first met, neither backed down immediately, and one could not effectively intimidate the other. they both held their own forms of power, and, perhaps, erasmus was right. perhaps tawnyrose had underestimated him, and perhaps he had underestimated her as well. but she knew that she had been right when she told softglow that they were similar, and it was evident to tawnyrose in the moment when they stared at each other, with so much left unsaid. all of the hostility and hatred, all of the effort put in to bring the other down, and tawnyrose waited. they all waited to hear what erasmus would say. then, at last, he spoke. "i know that the judgement has already been passed, no matter what i say," erasmus said. "you have decided for yourselves that i am guilty, so i must be. and i am." after a long pause, tawnyrose tipped her head to one side. "is that your defense?" she asked. "i will not beg for your mercy," erasmus said. "i will not bow to you. i bow to no one." tawnyrose found that she felt no pleasure in the moment, though she straightened up. "very well. erasmus, you are found guilty of the charges presented, and it is time for your punishment." "and who would you have kill me?" erasmus asked, and tawnyrose merely huffed and shook her head. "no, erasmus," tawnyrose said. "you will not die today. the stranger has not come for you yet, so his will is to be done on his own time. instead, you are to be stripped of your rank. you will be kept to highgarden's camp, where we can ensure that you will be secure," she said. she stepped forward, nodding to the guards to reclaim their positions. "your fate is in the paws of the gods, and it is not our place to take your life. but we can make sure that you will not hurt another cat, or steal another future. your crimes are your prison, for now until the stranger comes to take you, may he be merciful." with that, tawnyrose waved her tail, and highgarden turned on erasmus, spitting and shouting insults as he was led away again. through it all, tawnyrose caught spencer's eye through the crowd, while he watched his mate be mocked and torn down for his crimes. tawnyrose paused, holding spencer's gaze for a moment longer before she turned and addressed the clan again. "highgarden!" she shouted to regain their attention. "i understand that we have faced a great loss and a great hardship, and i share your pain. lightkit... she was a light to all of us, in every way. she represented the future of the next generation, as the queen who should have been. but i refuse to let her legacy be bloodshed, even the blood of her killer. instead, let us unite in this moment, right now, to celebrate her life and to know that she is at peace with the gods. we cannot get her back, but we can remember the short time she was with us. please, join me now." silence stretched through the camp, so quiet that tawnyrose could have sworn that she could hear the stars twinkle over their heads. she scanned the crowd, finding quillpaw leaning against ferretwhisker's shoulder, his own body wracked with quiet sobs for his friend. hawthornkit and bamblekit had buried their faces into yewbloom's flank, and the three toms cried their own tears while wolverinesnap bent his head low and pressed his forehead against yewbloom's. softglow stared unblinkingly up at the stars, and it was birchflame who met tawnyrose's gaze. there was a fire behind his eyes, a dangerous sort of light that gleamed and flickered like the flame of his namesake. and then he turned his head away, and tawnyrose allowed herself just a moment to sit with her thoughts and remember her departed daughter.
the days following erasmus' trial were surprisingly quiet in highgarden's camp. though it was clear that several of the clan cats disagreed with tawnyrose's decision to allow the dark tom to live, let alone in the middle of their camp, it remained abundantly clear that the clan also respected tawnyrose too much to go against her commands. no one had lost more than tawnyrose. as much as they all loved lightkit and held her memory as dear, she was a daughter first, and pain laced each and every movement that tawnyrose made. still, their queen made a show of coming out of her den, of taking a walk around the camp with bluetcrest while her closest friend healed, of watching the thorns train outside of their den, of chatting and sharing meals with her clan. as the days passed, however, flickersky also couldn't help but notice that the queen avoided the nursery at all costs, not even to going to greet hawthornkit and bramblekit. as flickersky lounged with swiftheart outside of the nursery, her friend grooming her flank, flickersky watched as hawthornkit was lying in a patch of side, his eyes closed but his flank rising and falling with full breaths, as if he was pretending to sleep. bramblekit was playing with flickersky's kits, chasing after tornadokit's quick steps along with cirruskit and tsunamikit. even still, the brown tabby appeared to have little interest in the game, and it was only a matter of time before he excused himself from his denmates to go to hawthornkit's side. upon his brother's approach, hawthornkit cracked one eye and shifted to give bramblekit room to settle. cirruskit watched after his friends for a moment before tornadokit streaked by him again, kicking up grass, and flickersky looked to swiftheart. "i'm worried about them," she said quietly, and swiftheart paused in her grooming to follow flickersky's glance. for a long moment, she merely watched as hawthornkit closed his eyes again and bramblekit rested his chin atop his brother's shoulder, still watching the other kits play. then, at last, swiftheart shook her head slightly. "ayalla said that she hasn't seen tawnyrose in the nursery at all, just softglow," swiftheart said, moving closer to lean companionably against flickersky. they kept their voices quiet. "she used to visit every now and then but not since..." flickersky trailed off for a moment. then she cleared her throat, taking the pause to consider her thoughts. "i just can't imagine leaving them like that. i just think about my own kits with stormshroud, and i miss them, you know? i wonder when i'll see them next. i wonder what they're doing, if they're making friends, if the other queens are taking care of them while stormshroud is out on patrol or something like that." she sighed heavily, letting her shoulders sink. it was another moment before she looked up at swiftheart's soft, bemused expression. "what's that look for?" she asked, and swiftheart purred, bumping her forehead against flickersky's shoulder. "nothing it's just... you," swiftheart said with a gentle purr. "don't you remember how we were in the beginning, when we all first met? it feels like we've all grown up so much. so much has happened over the seasons." "i remember how you would drone on and on about smallheart for hours," flickersky teased with a broad grin. swiftheart bumped her again, but flickersky pressed on. "i remember all of the nights while you sat and wondered if smallheart would ever like you back, how you'd ask me if i thought he was looking at you different, what it meant when he asked you to go hunting with just the two of you -" "stop!" swiftheart laughed, trying to interrupt flickersky. "- and now you're mates!" flickersky finished with a broad grin, and swiftheart let out a huff. "i never would have thought that we'd wind up here, you know? we both have mates, and you'll have kits soon enough who can be friends with my kits. it feels so strange that we've been here for so many moons, doesn't it? so much has changed." swiftheart hummed thoughtfully. "a lot has changed, but a lot has also stayed the same. and some of it was bad, but a lot of it was good, don't you think?" "definitely," flickersky said with a nod. she glanced over to where her kits continued to play. tsunamikit tackled tornadokit, sending her sister skidding directly into cirruskit. the trio toppled in a laughing heap of fur. "and if it means having them, i wouldn't change anything..." she trailed off, but there was a thoughtful lilt to the words, and swiftheart nuzzled her friend gently. "do you miss him?" she asked, and flickersky managed a tight smile. "all of the time. it's like a piece of me is lost. i miss stormshroud and the other kits more than i can say," she said, blinking at swiftheart. "sometimes i wonder if they'll remember me the next time i see them. i wonder what they'll think of cirruskit, tornadokit, and tsunamikit... i wonder how much they'll have grown. and i want them to know their father and their littermates." at flickersky's tight smile, swiftheart nestled closer to her, offering physical comfort. "i know they must be missing you dearly, but i don't have any doubt that you'll see them again soon," she said. there was a long stretch of silence between the friends before swiftheart wrinkled her nose. "you know, during the attack i was so worried. not for my own safety, but for smallheart's. i was so worried that something might happen to him, and that i wouldn't be able to help." she let out a shuttering breath. "i think we both have loved each other for so long. it's always been us. when we left amberclan, it was just the two of us, holding on to have some semblance of home, but it was also more than that, if that makes sense." "it does," flickersky murmured, touching her nose to swiftheart's ear. "right. and we've been together for so long, like we've always had each other's backs through everything. when we came to highgarden, we were both so wary. what if we lose it all again? but i knew that we would stay together, no matter what happened. so when we were actually in some sort of danger, i wasn't worried about myself. i was worried that something would happen to him and that i would let him down. i'd be lost without him," swiftheart said, and flickersky hummed. "that's how i feel without stormshroud and the other kits. so lost," flickersky said. again, she looked to where hawthornkit and bramblekit were resting. "and i think that's how they feel, too." "lost," swiftheart echoed while the rest of the clan continued to move around them, attending to their duties for the day.
the sunset bled across the sky, casting the clouds in shades of red and pink, set against the darkening sky. in the distance, the moon became to rise through the sky, hovering lazily over the treetops, and hornetshade wondered for a long moment what the sky looked like from across the water. he thought that maybe he could hear the rumble of the waterfall that marked the border between groveclan and highgarden, though he couldn't be entirely certain. the sounds of water lapping at the shore soothed hornetshade, and he felt that he should be entirely at peace, but a restlessness continued to claw between his shoulders, itching at the base of his tail that he wasn't done. so he watched the sky shimmer with fresh colors, listening to the water, and waiting for something beyond his comprehension. by the time he heard movement come up from behind him, the sky had darkened completely and hornetshade's muscles felt cold and stiff. "i thought i might find you here," her voice said, and hornetshade sniffed the air absently. "i wasn't trying to hide. not this time," he answered back, and he heard ferretwhisker's soft huff that could have been either annoyance of laughter. when she didn't come any closer, hornetshade merely flicked his tail impatiently. "i'd prefer if you didn't hover," he murmured, drawing his shoulders up towards his neck. "it makes me feel like you're just waiting to claw my fur off." "that's not exactly what i had in mind," ferretwhisker said, and hornetshade said nothing. all the same, the rose padded forward to sit down beside the younger tabby. "warblercry was looking around camp for you, iguanaspots said that you had gone off hunting." "and you came to find me... why?" he asked, but ferretwhisker didn't answer immeditately. instead she jutted her nose to point across the lake. "is it a good idea to sit on groveclan's border so soon after everything that's happened?" she asked. hornetshade considered a biting response, about not answering her, but he felt tired. the itch persisted, creeping along his spine. "probably not," he said honestly. "but i decided that i don't really care at the moment." and he realized that it was true. ferretwhisker considered this for a moment before nodding her head thoughtfully. "are we ever going to... are you ever going to not hate me so much, hornetshade?" she asked, and hornetshade knew that if he looked at ferretwhisker, he would either forgive her or claw her ears. he couldn't decide which was worse in the moment. "you killed my mother," hornetshade said. before ferretwhisker could answer, he flicked his tail. "right, montgomery and his followers killed my mother. not you. it was someone else, right? you were too busy letting me escape. a kit... all on his own." he frowned. "but you also didn't stop them, so you let them kill her. which might even be worse than killing her, i'm not sure. maybe we should ask erasmus and see which he thinks is worse." when he saw ferretwhisker flinch out of the corner of his eye, hornetshade felt nothing. no pride, no pity. he felt numb. "but you're still a killer. you've killed cats before for him." "i have," ferretwhisker whispered. "why do you bother coming back here, ferretwhisker? what do you want from me?" ferretwhisker took a long moment to answer. "i have nightmares, too, you know. not just of that night, but of all of the nights. in my dreams, i watch myself nodding along as montgomery talked about killing our clanmates so he could be leader. i remember all of the faces. i remember his face, and the way he would smile like he had a secret. and i guess he had a lot of secrets and a lot that he was proud of. and i... when i left, i thought that i would remember what happened with montgomery. i thought that i would know when there was a darkness in a cat, and that i would know what to do." finally hornetshade turned his head to look to ferretwhisker, and her blue eyes were wide with fear and grief. "and i don't expect your forgiveness. what i did or didn't do... i still did horrible things for him, and i'll never forgive myself, either. but... i was so blind to what was happening here. i thought i would know and i didn't... but you did. you knew about erasmus, and you told me but i was still blinded." she shook her head quickly, furious with herself. "i didn't do anything, again, and i should have. i should've done more so i could be better." "almost all of the clan was blinded," hornetshade said after a long beat. "you can't let yourself get caught up in that. it'll kill you. and you can't let him win like that." ferretwhisker drew in a deep, steadying breath. "i just think of my kits, of my mate in bearclan and i... i feel so ashamed. what if erasmus hadn't been caught? my kits would have been caught in a war." finally, ferretwhisker met hornetshade's gaze. "no one should be caught in violence like that so young." and hornetshade blinked at that. "not even your kits," he agreed. there was a beat of silence before hornetshade looked back towards the lake. "i had a best friend in groveclan, and i saw him during the attack. and i... i realized during the attack that i couldn't hurt any of the groveclan cats. they were all his friends, his family, his clanmates. and i was frozen, and i was afraid. i let highgarden down and let my friends be in potential danger because i couldn't raise a claw to his friends." ferretwhisker followed hornetshade's gaze. "that doesn't make you disloyal. you knew that they weren't your enemies. no one can fault you for that." "i can fault myself," hornetshade said, and it earned a surprised huff of laughter from the pointed molly. "i suppose we can all fault ourselves, huh? even if no one else knows what you did, you'll always feel guilty." "yeah," hornetshade said before he finally rose, stretching out his limbs. then he turned, hesitating at the last moment to look back at ferretwhisker. "let me ask you a question. is montgomery dead?" ferretwhisker swished her tail across the ground. "my worst nightmare is what would happen if he finds me again. you and i both know that montgomery doesn't treat runaways well." she sighed. "if he was dead, then maybe i'd be able to sleep in peace." hornetshade squared his shoulders and nodded his head once. "if that was the case, then maybe we'd both be able to stop the nightmares." without waiting for an answer, hornetshade padded away, leaving ferretwhisker alone with the small waves lapping gently at the shore.
as the clan gathered in the camp for the second time in the moon, there was a lighter, happier energy that pervaded the hollow as tulipstream and bassflow gathered with their kits and extended family. maplelily pressed her cheek companionably to tulipstream's, only to nudge bassflow with a wide grin. for the first time in moons, it seemed as though highgarden appeared to be in slightly better spirits, aided by the warm breeze that stirred their fur. with the sunset casting the skies in gorgeous hues, tawnyrose decided that it was time. she glanced to softglow who stood to one side, and then to yewbloom, who had taken bluetcrest's position opposite her. she knew that her brother was trying his best, but tawnyrose knew that yewbloom was even less accustomed to the poise and necessary attitude of an attendant - he didn't hold the necessary skills for organizing patrols or staying by tawnyrose's side, not as bluetcrest managed so seamlessly. on the whole, it merely served as a reminder of what had taken place, but tawnyrose forced herself to wear a smile when she rose to address her clan. "i'm glad that we can come together this moon for such a joyous occasion. because there is no better time than the celebrate the youth of the clan rising to new ranks with their growth. it's times like these that i do feel hopeful. despite everything that has been happening, it warms my heart to find that highgarden is still, is always, growing strong. because we are stronger than we have been given credit for, and these are the storms we weather together," tawnyrose began. she paused and swallowed around the lump in her throat before drawing in a deep breath. "adenium has requested that she keep her name as she becomes a thorn of highgarden. so, though she will not be changing her name, highgarden welcomes her as she begins her training to become a rose," tawnyrose said, allowing her gaze to travel from the little tortoiseshell to scan the crowd. "adenium, you will be mentored by otterfur. he is a very experienced knight, with a kind heart. he carries many stories and much wisdom from his past, and he has served as tanagercall's unofficial mentor when she first joined highgarden. i believe that you will have much to learn from him, and i urge you to follow in his pawsteps, for he is a loyal and honorable member of highgarden." the announcement came with much praise, and the skinny brown tom appeared rather shocked at the honor when he stepped forward to meet his thorn. adenium bounded forward to greet her mentor, though otterfur glanced up at tawnyrose with obvious confusion written over his features, but tawnyrose offered only the slightest inclination of her head and a small smile. when the cheers died down, tawnyrose waved her tail, beckoning stagpaw, rabbitpaw, and seedpaw forward. "it's an honor to watch highgarden's first seedlings be given their full names," tawnyrose began, allowing a smile to curve her mouth. "when you three were first born, highgarden itself was like a kit, and i like to think that it has grown alongside you. just as you have gained wisdom and trained, so too has the clan as a whole, taking in new experiences and striving forward. as we all know, the words of highgarden are 'growing strong' and i can't think of a cat who embodies this more than you three," tawnyrose said, feeling her chest well with emotion before she breathed in deeply to steady herself. "and it is my pleasure as the queen of highgarden to ask you three, stagpaw, rabbitpaw, and seedpaw: do you swear to serve highgarden as a knight until you are no longer able, loyal to the clan above all else, even if it means giving up your own life? do you pledge yourself under the light of the seven gods: the mother, the maiden, the father, the warrior, the smith, the crone, and the stranger?" "i do!" stagpaw said loudly, bold and fierce. "i do," rabbitpaw said, energetic and free. "i do," seedpaw said, steady and sure. "from this moment forward, stagpaw, you will be known as stagscorch, for your surefire tenacity and strength. the gods have blessed you with bold resolve and the confidence to follow your heart and your paws on whatever path you set your mind to. rabbitpaw, you will be known as rabbitrace for for boundless energy and optimism. the gods have blessed you with a sharp mind and quick paws that will carry you very far," tawnyrose said, before turning to seedpaw. "and, seedpaw, you are renamed seedspring, for your kindness and the warmth of your spirit that is like the warmest day in spring. the gods have blessed you with thoughtfulness and wisdom far beyond your seasons. and highgarden is blessed to welcome you as full members of our clan." cheers erupted from the clan, and tawnyrose stepped back to allow the three to bask in their moment of glory. stagscorch nudged rabbitrace hard enough to nearly knock her off her paws, and seedspring beamed widely at tulipstream, who fussed over her kits just as she had since the day they were born. hawthornkit, bramblekit, and snowykit emerged to congratulate adenium, and otterfur stood in the midst of it all, watching the younger members of the clan enjoy the celebration before he looked up to see hurricanejaw padding over to him. "congratulations," hurricanejaw said, and otterfur grinned bashfully. "you looked very surprised when she first called your name, but you should be excited. you've definitely earned it." "i am excited," otterfur said. "i know everyone thought that merlinsong would take adenium in, but she seems genuinely happy to begin training, and i know that she's smart. i don't think she'll be difficult to train," he mused. "of course," hurricanejaw said thoughtfully, but his tone was beginning to drift, as he was moving onto another thought. "she called you honorable and loyal." "huh?" otterfur asked, blinking at hurricanejaw. "tawnyrose. she said that you were a loyal and honorable knight." "oh," otterfur said, lowering his eyes to look at his paws. "i suppose she did." however, his gaze snapped back up to hurricanejaw when the knight continued, his tone soft and thoughtful, as he considered each spoken word, as if turning it over and over again in his mind. "is it true?" hurricanejaw asked. "are you an honorable knight?" otterfur couldn't help but blink up at his friend with wide eyes, shocked into momentary silence. around them, the clan continued the celebration, completely unaware of the conversation taking place in the wake of merriment. "of course i am, hurricanejaw. you know me. i'm loyal to highgarden." "are you?" it wasn't an unkind question, and otterfur knew that hurricanejaw was genuine, merely searching for answers. "you left the patrol, you went against orders." "and you covered for me. does that mean that you're not loyal either?" hurricanejaw managed a tight smile at that, bemused. "i've been asking myself that question, and i decided that i'm not entirely sure." there was a beat of silence between them. "i've heard some of the others wondering how badgerstar knew we were coming when his patrols clearly didn't. because if they had nothing to do with it, how could it make sense that they would know to expect us? my current suspicion is that someone warned them but... everyone was accounted for on a patrol or in camp," hurricanejaw said, and otterfur heard all he needed to hear from the other knight's tone. "i did what i had to do," otterfur said, swishing his tail. "if i hadn't, who knows what could have happened." "it would've been bloody," hurricanejaw agreed. there was another pause before he shrugged his shoulders. "and it might have saved my kits' lives. i'm grateful for it, you know. we didn't need a war. i just... i need to know how you knew," hurricanejaw said. "it's a... it's a long story," otterfur said, lowering his shoulders. "and it started a very long time ago, back in bearclan. i can't tell you all of it here or now, and i know it'll change what you think about me. but if you really can't let it rest without knowing... i'll tell you but just, not now." otterfur feared that hurricanejaw might reject the notion, and was pleasantly surprised when the broad-shouldered tom smiled warmly at him. "whatever happened, i'm sure that you saved a lot of lives, and i could never fault you for that." his eyes traveled back to the center of activity, where adenium was speaking to harrierpaw and beechpaw. "enjoy your night, otterfur. congratulations, you've earned this."
her paw pads felt rubbed raw from so much traveling over the seasons, constantly seeking the friends that she had lost. it had been a long time since katara last saw her friends, when riverfoam, tanagercall, kitechaser, and ayalla passed through the shelter that she and several other cats had shared during the time that the mollies had stayed with katara and her group. she missed the barn - she truly missed the barn and the soft comforts of lying in the hay. after leaving her housefolk, katara wandered to the barn on a whim, which acted as a rotating door of travelers moving in and out. some stayed longer than others, and katara had been injured from her time between her home and the barn, which meant that she was one of the members who lingered a little longer. it was during that time when katara met riverfoam's group, and she and the other mollies had become friends. riverfoam and kitechaser described their former life as clanmates, ayalla helped teach katara how to hunt the mice that scurried among the tall grass, and tanagercall shared katara's experience as a former-housepet. for a long time, all was well, that is, until the group had decided to continue on their way. riverfoam said that they were on their way to find a new clan; kitechaser said that katara was welcome to join them; tanagercall said that she would be good company; ayalla encouraged her, promising to teach her new tricks along the way. but katara had still been weak, then. she had been weak and uncertain. she had declined the offer and lost the four best friends she might ever have. it left a sour taste in her mouth. naturally, it was only a matter of time until katara moved on, as well. for as long as some cats stayed in the barn, few stayed forever. katara had grown weary of hunting mice among the bales of hay. she missed her friends. the horizon lured her on, in the last direction she had seen her friends' silhouettes disappear to. she knew that it was a longshot, but she met others along the way who could help her, and she always asked if they might show her the way her friends had gone. it wasn't easy to miss the foursome of boisterous mollies, from ayalla's boundless energy to riverfoam's soothing voice and kind heart. they were memorable cats, and katara had grown stronger and bolder. she wasn't so afraid of the world anymore. more than once, strangers looked only to katara's collar that remained around her neck. several of the strangers were bold enough to suggest she take it off, if she ever wanted to be taken seriously. the suggestion persisted even further when they learned the pretty molly's intention to link up with clan cats, but she continued to brush it off. her collar wasn't going to hurt anyone, she told herself, and she didn't need to prove anything. she knew that she was capable, and she wasn't the same soft pet that had been left alone in the garden too long. the tree cover over her head provided katara a sense of relief from the afternoon sunbeams. she walked along a trail of strong clan-scent, noting in her mind that it was likely a border marking between two neighboring clans. someone, she thought to herself, someone will have to come by eventually. and so she walked, keeping her ears and eyes alert for any sign of movement. fortunately, she wasn't left waiting for too long. the brown and white cat was alone as he walked alone, and katara gazed along the treeline for a moment before calling out to him. the stranger's ears swiveled in her direction, and katara waved her tail in greeting. "can i help you with something?" the stranger asked, and katara bobbed her head. "maybe. i'm looking for some friends and i heard they were headed in this way, last anyone saw. they said they were headed towards clan territory and were considering joining a clan. their names are riverfoam, kitechaser, ayalla, and tanagercall," katara explained, and the tom listened patiently before shaking his head slightly. "nah, i haven't heard of them," he said. katara must have deflated slightly at the false lead, but the tom padded forward, closer towards the border marking. "they might not be in vagaryclan, but i've heard that highgarden takes in travelers, too. they live that way. someone there might have seen your friends," he explained, and katara nodded her head as she followed his directions. "thank you, that's very helpful of you," she said. "i appreciate it. but i should be getting on my way, now." the stranger seemed to hesitate for a moment, opening his mouth once again. "i'm not sure how far their camp is from here. it might be a bit of a walk." "that's alright, i think i can managed just fine," she said, and the stranger finally nodded, leaving katara to go off on her own. the road had turned her muscles hard. at first, her body ached from exertion after a long day of walking, but the aches faded to the wayside. she could travel faster and longer. she found that hunting came easier over time, as did fishing, running, stalking, and tracking. she found that she excelled at swimming, which came in handy more than once as she crossed into a territory crossed with streams on the outskirts. there was a tug in her paws, urging her closer and closer towards a babbling brook. the weather would start to grow cold soon, she thought to herself, but the afternoon heat bore down on her pelt, and she stepped along the waterbank to cool her paws and take a drink of refreshing water. however, there was the sound of a cry and a splash, and katara lifted her head, scattering water droplets. she pricked her ears, wondering if she had actually heard the shout, but another scream sounded downstream, and katara didn't hesitate to sprint out of the water, headed up the shore in the direction it came from. "i'm coming!" she shouted in response to the sound. "i'm coming to help!" she skidded to a halt at the edge of the stream, just in time to watch as a pale head bobbed out of the water. the cat couldn't be any larger than a kit, at best, and it wailed for helped as it paddled its small paws helplessly against the current. katara crouched low and extended a paw towards the kit. "i'm here, i'm here. take my paw!" she said, but the kit's leg was too short. when they reached for one another, katara's paw hung helplessly in the air, just out of reach. the kit wailed again before being pulled under and further down the shore. katara followed, pushing hard to keep up with the curent while shouting encouragements. in that same moment, another voice called out: "hey, what are you still doing here?" the stranger from before asked, either missing the kit's drowning form and the urgency in katara's sprint, or ignoring it. but his eyes were soft and katara was inclined to think the former. "he's drowning. help me help him," she said, not giving the stranger any time to process it before she pushed on, trying to get ahead of the kit. "i need you to spot me and get me closer towards them, okay?" but she didn't wait for an answer before bunching her muscles. without any hesitation, katara dove into the stream. she heard the tom let out a surprised shout when her head broke the surface, but she was too busy blinking water from her eyes to listen, that is, until he called out to her: "coming up on your right shoulder!" the stranger warned, and katara didn't hesitate. with strong, practiced strokes, she turned, using her tail to give her leverage. she kicked out against the current. the water crashed up over her nose and face, but she didn't stop. her paw connected with a solid form, and she found the kit within her grip. she stretched her neck forward, grasping the kit by the scruff, and pushed off through the water again. the kit was like dead-weight in her jaws, pulling at her neck and tugging her lower in the water. when the kit's head bobbed under the surface again, he struggled, throwing katara's weight to the side, and she slammed sideways in the rocky bank. she tried to pulled them both up higher in the water, but it was little use. she was used to her own weight and swimming freely, but the kit's weight sapped her strength quickly. over the water, she tried to find the stranger, but he was gone, and katara felt weaker with each passing heartbeat. she wrenched her head, but the kit struggled again, crying out, and katara's grip fell loose. again, the kit went under the water, and katara screamed. "no!" she cried, diving down again to find the kit. she managed to grab him again and pull him up, but they were both even weaker than before. however, just when katara felt her legs falter and buckle in the water, a voice sounded again, not too far from her left. "right here," the stranger was saying. "bring 'em over here. you're almost there, i'm here to help you." it took the last of her strength, but katara managed to turn herself around again, and she found the stranger waiting for them in the shallows closest to the bank. when katara swam close enough, he waded out to take the kit from her grasp, and he laid the kit down on dry ground, supporting katara with his shoulder as she pulled herself from the water as well. together, they all made it back to the grass. katara settled down, her legs buckling underneath her, as the pounding in her ears began to grow quieter and quieter. "he's going to be okay," the stranger said. "that wasn't so bad for a kittypet." there was laughter in his tone, but katara glanced down to the kit. after a moment, she shook her head and pulled herself closer to the little tom. "i'm not a kittypet anymore," she said. but the tom merely shrugged his shoulders. "well, fluff, you impressed me. no matter who you are, you've got guts." "my name's katara," she said. she watched as the kit's breathing came in strong and steady before the stranger padded closer and dipped his head. "well, katara. i'm cedarbranch, from vagaryclan. it's nice to meet you." katara nodded slowly, taking in another breath. "you too, cedarbranch."
clovershine watched and waited. over the moons, he thought that the time would come, when birchflame finally recognized his mistake and came to him to apologize. it seemed that, over the past moons, the clan had recognized past errors and were even trying to make amends. merlinsong kept spencer by his side, hurricanejaw and newtmask shared meals, and even daystrike seemed to make an effort to engage himself more with his clanmates. all around, clovershine watched the newest rose, katara, be welcomed into the clan with hollandkit, the other knights and roses shared news from the day, different stories from patrols and stories from the past, but birchflame never came to clovershine's side. in the tom's mismatched eyes, it seemed that there was only one hidden grudge left in the clan, and it crackled between him and birchflame like an open fire. so, he thought on it. he considered his options and how much it meant to him. he considered what he knew of the most recent events; he thought of the secrets he knew that the rest of the clan was not so privy of. he measured and weighed the blaze in birchflame's green eyes, and he decided that he would extend his olive branch. perhaps it wasn't something that he might have done in the past - when he was still storm and birchflame was still prometheus - but it was something that he wanted clovershine to do. so he did. "hey," clovershine greeted simply one evening. while the rest of the clan had settled into their normal groups to share their meals, birchflame sat at the edge of the clearing, alone and isolated. "do you mind if i join you?" he asked, but birchflame didn't answer. clovershine decided that it was worth the potential of having his ears clawed. he settled at birchflame's shoulder and tucked into the mouse he brought with him. for a while, he allowed the silence, more than happy for the extra time to mull over his words. birchflame pulled feathers from a finch and clovershine picked at his mouse. for a moment, it was almost easy to pretend that nothing had changed between them. but the mouse could only last so long, and birchflame finally pushed the remaining bird away from himself. "if you want to say something," birchflame muttered quietly. "you might as well get it over with before you start digging for marrow to fill your mouth." his words were sour, but clovershine paused. he thought of betonypetal - gentle, sweet betonypetal - and drew in a deep breath to calm his nerves. "i just... i wanted to say that i can't imagine what you're going through," clovershine said. "right now, from where i'm standing, it looks like you're doing this all on your own. i mean - what happened... i'm just trying to say that i'm sorry, and that i'm here for you. if there's anything you want to talk about, i'm here for you." in the best-case scenario, clovershine had imagined that birchflame might have let down the walls, even a little bit. in the worst case, he imagined birchflame's claws scoring across his face. lovershine found that his words hurt more than the sharpest of claws ever could. "no," birchflame said, quiet. "how could you understand? my daughter was murdered by a cat we shared a den with. i never had the chance to see her grow up. she was so young and had her entire future taken away from her." the great knight drew in a shuddering breath. pain pooled deep in his green eyes as he stared hard at his paws. "i never got the chance to even be her father, because no one can know who her real father is or... or tawnyrose would lose all of her standing. because i guess power is more important than us and i... i keep thinking that if i had been able to be her father, i would have been able to be closer to her so i could protect her. and maybe none of this would have happened." birchflame's laugh was sad and chilling, entirely unnatural, and it set clovershine's fur on-end. "i -" "no," birchflame snapped. "no, you don't understand, clovershine. so you should just get out of here. leave me alone. because you didn't save her either, and i can't bare to look at you." "birchflame -" clovershine tried again, but birchflame lashed his tail and thrust his head. "go," he hissed, and clovershine finally found his paws. he backed away slowly, then turned away. instead, he found betonypetal sitting with yewbloom and wolverinesnap, but the trio looked up at clovershine's approach. the pretty molly blinked up at clovershine, and his eyes remained locked with hers. "can we talk for a minute?" he asked, and betonypetal didn't hesitate to get up, excusing herself quietly to the prince and wolverinesnap. but yewbloom merely waved his tail dismissively and leaned against wolverinesnap's shoulder. she followed clovershine wordlessly as he headed directly out of the camp. she didn't ask any questions and didn't try to stop him. he walked and she followed after him under he had walked himself out and they stood together in the middle of the mother's grounds. "should i ask?" betonypetal said when clovershine merely stood, staring into the trees. clovershine swished his tail wordlessly, unable to find anything to say, and betonypetal blew out a long breath. "please, clovershine, talk to me. please. i can't help you if i don't know what's going on." clovershine stared at betonypetal for a moment, as if to gather his thoughts. he blinked at her. "what would you do if you knew that a secret was killing your friend? like, you can see that it's hurting them so badly and is causing them so much pain. and you know the secret, but you can't be sue if telling the secret would actually help your friend, but you know that keeping the secret is leaving this heavy weight on their back that they just can't get rid of, and they think that they have to carry it alone? but it's also not your secret to tell, even if it would help," clovershine said. he could see the confusion in betonypetal's eyes, as she was struggling to put the pieces together and make sense of what he was saying. "it sounds like a poison," betonypetal said quietly, and clovershine nodded slowly. "it is a poison," he agreed. "it's poisoning him and it's... it's spreading further than a lot of cats know. a lot of the cats that are affected don't even know. but he... it's hurting him so badly, and i can't do anything about it. he won't let me in, betonypetal, and it hurts to see him hurting." like a dam finally broke, clovershine let out a sob, and then another one, and another one. he sobbed for a life lost forever, and for the pain that birchflame wouldn't cry for. when betonypetal stepped closer, clovershine tucked his face into the soft fur at he neck. he let out another shuddering sob before he finally was able to collect himself. when he pulled away, struck suddenly by a moment of revelation, betonypetal blinked at him. "i don't want there to be any secrets between us, betonypetal." her smile was gentle, bemused, and sympathetic. "silly," she murmured. "there aren't any secrets between us." and clovershine matched her smile. "perhaps not, and i want to keep it that way. but i... i need to tell you that i'm in love with you," clovershine said. "you are so bright, and so kind. you're gentle, you're warm. gods - you're the warm summer breeze, the gentle snowfall in winter, the open autumn skies, and the first flower bud in spring. you're the center of my world. during the groveclan attack, i was so worried about you, and i just didn't want to lose you, i couldn't. you get me better than anyone else, and i need you to know that i'm always going to be here for you as well, and i'm not going anywhere, betonypetal. i love you." betonypetal let out a rumbling purr that was gentle, just as everything she did, when she pressed their foreheads together. "i love you, clovershine. shine... your name is so fitting, you know? you shine brighter than the moon, the sun, and all of the stars combined. i'm always going to be here for you, i'm not going anywhere," she said. "i love you. and there aren't any secrets that could ever tear us apart. it's you and me." "us," clovershine whispered in the space between them. and together, they settled in their moment of peace, where there were no secrets, and no secrets could cause them harm.
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Sept 13, 2020 8:15:01 GMT -8
in a moment of complete chaos and devastation, stormshroud could think only of holding himself together to keep his family alive. before his eyes, he watched as the shadowed kingdom collapsed. he lost whitespring, he lost his friends, he lost a home that he had thought would be stable for the rest of his life. his sister was gone, as were the cats with whom he had forged what he thought would be lasting friendships. pain invaded every corner of his mind, threatening paralysis, but his son and daughter were still so young, so small, and one thought persisted stronger than the rest: flickersky. he had to get to flickersky and their other kits. by the mercy of the gods, he had to get to highgarden to meet his mate again. it was the only solution he had left, so he grasped it tightly and refused to let go. he kept it simple, putting one paw in front of the other, and then another, and then another. on and on he walked, stopping again and again to urge hurricanekit and quakekit forward. "c'mon," he encouraged them when hurricanekit flopped down and quakekit rested back on her haunches. "we're not too far, now," he urged, but hurricanekit let out a low whine. "dad, you've been saying that forever," hurricanekit complained. "and my paws are sore," quakekit added, to hurricanekit's fervent nods. "like they'll fall off if i take another step." stormshroud looked at his kits with sympathy, letting out a low breath. "i know, we've already come so far. but we're almost to your mother and siblings. and they'll have food and a place to rest for all of us." the entire time, he had been thinking what he might say to flickersky. he had assured her time and time again that the shadowed kingdom was safe - he told her that he was safe, and he told her that he would keep their kits safe when they came to join him. he had promised, but he had been blinded by hope. he had lost too many friend, too many homes over the seasons. he hoped that the shadowed kingdom wasn't like the others, but he had been so sorely wrong, and it stung worse than any wound he had endured in his life. it was a shame that weighed his shoulders, to have to crawl into highgarden's territory and hope that their queen would be gentile enough to welcome the weary trio. "i miss mom," hurricanekit said after a long moment. "we should have brought mallowsun with us. i think they would've been good friends." this time it was quakekit's turn to nod with her brother's words. "and what about lionpaw and sagewater, and orchidkit and seraphlight and -" "i know, i know," stormshroud soothed, finally settling down when he realized that his kits wouldn't budge until he had answered them properly. he sighed and his shoulders sank. "i know, i miss our friends too. but home isn't home anymore, you know that." quakekit nodded again, slow and sullen, but hurricanekit stared up at their father with round eyes. "i've seen clans break apart before, and it gets messy. when cats get into such a state of panic and they don't know which way is up, they get desperate. and when cats get desperate... they do things without thinking. bad things. and you two are my priority, you and your littermates and your mother. as much as i care about our friends and whitespring, i need to take care of you two first and foremost." there was a long pause when stomshroud considered the situation once more. "besides, i can't make promises to them. we might be in luck with tawnyrose and the rest of highgarden, that they'll give us a place to stay, but others might not be so lucky. we can't expect highgarden to support the shadowed kingdom." "i understand," quakekit murmured quietly, and stormshroud bent his head to nuzzle his daughter, and then his son. "i know it's hard to take in, but i need you both to be strong now, okay? with luck we'll find a highgarden patrol soon, and they'll help us find our way," stormshroud said, unable to help the burst of pride in his chest when quakekit and hurricanekit both stood, shaking out their long fur and short legs to carry on. to be sure, highgarden's territory was beautiful. babbling streams crisscrossed wooded areas and meadows that stretched along the mouth of the valley. mountains towered high, but even the rocky landscape was dotted with plant growth as low-hanging trees and shrubs grouped together on the precipice. though stormshroud had met flickersky seasons earlier and had crossed into highgarden territory more times that he was sure either clan would care to know, he had never gone so far or dared to take the time to view the majesty of his mate's home. he missed the shadowed kingdom, to be sure, but it was impossible to not admire the views and to find joy in his own kits' eyes as they gazed upon the sprawling hills and valleys. then, at last, a form crested over one of the hills, snowy fur standing out sorely in the bright sunshine, and hurricanekit drew up on his hind legs, craning to get a better look. "dad - is that a highgarden cat?" he asked, only to let out an awed gasp as the white cat was trailed by other forms. even from a distance, it was easy to hear the patrol shouting back and forth to one another as they spaced out, moving in fluid, practiced motions that allowed them to cover more ground. finally, the white cat called out to the rest of the patrol, and stormshroud watched as the formation shifted direction. he wrapped his tail around his kits and drew them closer to his side. "please state your name and business with highgarden," the white cat called when there was still some distance between them, but stormshroud was immediately struck by a bolt of familiarity. at first, it was easily to chalk it up to neighbors, that it was more than likely their paths had crossed before, but there was no mistaking his former friend's face, coming closer and closer like out of the past. "gods - az, is that really you?" storm asked, and stormshroud smiled despite himself. "storm - it's good to see you. don't tell me you're in highgarden?" stormshroud said, and his friend shook his head, padding forward to touch their foreheads together warmly. "it's good to see you again." "likewise," the highgarden knight said, and he waved his tail towards the rest of the patrol to set them at ease. a blue-point molly peered over his shoulder curiously, and then she leaned over to a pretty calico, who jutted her nose wordlessly at the kits who peeked out at the patrol. a lithe oriental and a ginger tabby brought up the rear of the patrol, hanging back to gaze out across the rest of the meadows. "my name's actually clovershine now, though. by gods so much has changed since the old days, it feels like an eternity now." stormshroud nodded. "i couldn't agree more. my name's changed too. it's stormshroud now," he said, and clovershine flashed a lopsided grin. "ah, i see i was your inspiration, huh?" he teased. "you look a little worse for wear. what brings you this way?" he asked after a moment, and stormshroud looked down to his kits. "after the ice nation and azgeda, i wound up in another clan for a while. and then another after that - the shadowed kingdom to your border... it's gone now," he said, and he watched as the entire patrol took the information in. the blue molly hung her head, the oriental clicked his tongue distastefully, and clovershine's eyes went round. "we came here because... well, my mate and their mother lives in highgarden. flickersky?" "flickersky's your mate?" the calico asked, and when stormshroud nodded, she looked to the kits again. "by gods, we should've seen it immediately. your daughter looks so much like her." the calico dared to pad closer, then, leveling a glance at stormshroud, who dipped his head in turn. the calico bent down to be at eye-level with the pair of kits. "hello, i'm kitechaser. and these are my friends. we're all friends with your mother." "my name's hurricanekit," the little tom said, puffing out his chest. "and my sister's name is quakekit. do you have soft nests in highgarden?" "the softest," the ginger molly said, to hurricanekit's pleased squeak. "would you like to come with us to be the judge?" "would we ever," quakekit said, and the entire patrol broke into gentle laughter. both kits gazed up at their father, and stormshroud didn't hesitate to nod. hurricanekit let out an excited cheer, and clovershine raised his tail and looked to kitechaser. "could you and arcticblink run ahead to camp and tell them the good news? flickersky'll want to be the first at the entrance, and tawnyrose and bluetcrest will want to welcome them as well." kitechaser and the oriental, arcticblink, dipped their heads and headed off. hurricanekit and quakekit bounded towards the blue and ginger mollies, who greeted them warmly. clovershine looked to stormshroud. "don't worry, riverfoam and lyrewhistle are good with kits." stormshroud nodded listlessly, watching as the two mollies watched over his kits. he looked to clovershine as they began to walk, back in the direction the patrol had appeared from. "i can't believe it's gone. i lost another home," he said, and clovershine blinked his sympathy. "do you think... do you think that we'll be welcome here? my kits need a safe home, and i'm so tired of moving on to the next clan," he added. clovershine seemed to consider his words for a long moment. "i can't say that highgarden is perfect, because it's not. we have had our troubles here, but we've kept on. i know that many clans crumbled when it got hard, but they have words to live by here. 'growing strong,' tawnyrose says. those are highgarden's words. we're always growing, we've set deep roots," clovershine said, nodding towards the kits. "your kits are your roots. your mate is here, your family. it's not perfect, and maybe the day will come when we won't be here but... you know, i think we'll all be alright in the end." as they walked, stormshroud thought about this before he nodded. he bumped his shoulder against clovershine's. "since when did you start getting wise?" clovershine snorted and bumped stormshroud even harder. "i forgot that you were insufferable. i guess not everything's changed, after all." and they laughed together, like they had seasons and seasons earlier, when so much was so different, but some things had still been the same. "have you ever seen anyone else from the ice nation?" stormshroud asked after a beat. it seemed that clovershine missed a step, and the smile was wiped clear from his face. then it reappeared. "yeah, actually. do you remember prometheus? his name is birchflame now, we actually wound up here together. i haven't seen anyone else, not since you," clovershine said, but the brightness had dimmed from his eyes. "anyway, i think you'll really like highgarden. i know a lot of the roots will be excited to finally meet flickersky's mate. ferretwhisker and swiftheart have been trying to shake her down for moons so they could meet you. and tawnyrose... she's a good queen." cloveshine nodded his head again, as if to assure them both. "oh, and my own mate is in the nursery, too." before clovershine could say anything else, stormshroud flicked his ears curiously. "oh, clovershine, i should have known. you'll have to tell me all about her. i'm sure she's lovely. not as lovely as my mate or my kits, but i'm sure your family's nice too." clovershine finally let out another laugh, and it seemed that, for the moment, the shadows of doubt that receded. it was easy to fall into familiar company, with the knowledge that they were going back to their mates. and the moment was well.
it was quiet in her den, peaceful in the solitude. but it was also lonely. even as cats ushered in and out of her den, bringing news from the borders, even as she knew that she could - and perhaps should - step outside to join the pleasant chatter, to visit her sons in the nursery and her best friend in the herbalists' den, she didn't have it in her. only the softest daylight slipped into her den, where her nest served to offer solace. it should have been easy to forget to remember, but everything reminded her of her. she paused in her grooming to the sound of pawsteps approaching, and then his voice: "tawnyrose?" he asked. "softglow said that you wanted to see me." she wasn't sure if she actually did want to see him, but she knew that her choice was for the best. at the very least, she thought that it was for the best. "of course, come in," she called back. only moons ago, it was easy to talk to birchflame. all of the days and nights spent simply talking, swapping philosophies out of sight of the rest of the clan. she learned of his past, he asked about what was in store for the future. but as soon as he stood before her, his shoulders drawn up and his tailtip twitching, she found herself at a loss. it felt right that they might share their grief for their daughter, but tawnyrose knew that they were separated by the fact that birchflame had never had the chance to be a father to lightkit. "what can i do for you?" he asked, and she found his eyes were unfocused and distant. tawnyrose wondered if he was thinking just as she was. "we have several seedlings becoming thorns later this moon, and i'd like you to mentor bramblekit," she said. "he already has the makings of a strong knight, and i was hoping you'd be able to help condition him properly." birchflame, however, tossed his head and snorted. "what is this, tawnyrose? you want me to mentor my own son?" "he won't expect special treatment, since -" "he doesn't know that i'm his father, of course," birchflame spat. the fur along his spine had begun to bristle, and tawnyrose allowed herself to sit up taller and straighter. birchflame drew in a deep breath and circled in his place, pacing around himself. "because he thinks that softglow is his father. because you said that it would protect them if they didn't know the truth, right? well, that didn't help lightkit, did it? if anything, i think the harm comes from you being their mother." the words cut deep, piercing tawnyrose's pelt even worse than she had expected. but she refused to let him see her flinch. "you're grieving, you don't mean that," she said, but he shook his head. "if they weren't the kits of the queen, do you think erasmus might have targeted them? no, of course not. it's not a coincidence that lightkit was killed. she was the heir. badgerstar's daughter was killed because she was badgerstar's daughter. flickersky's kits were spared because they aren't as important to you as lightkit. erasmus wanted to hurt you, not her." birchflame stuk up his nose. "and i wasn't able to protect her, because no one could think that i was too close to the kits. and i'm barely given a chance to grieve, because i'm not supposed to seem like i most more than the rest of the clan." "i thought you'd want a chance to be close to your son," tawnyrose said when it seemed that birchflame had finished. "you'll be able to teach him everything he needs to know." birchflame finally allowed his shoulders to drop. he looked incredibly tired. "i want to be his father, not his mentor. but i know that's not possible. you took that away from me before they were even born," he said. "if you tell me to mentor him, then i will. because i serve highgarden, and i want to see the best for them. but don't pretend you're doing me a favor while you're driving thorns into my heart." he made to turn away, but he stopped at the sound of tawyrose's voice. "is that it, then?" birchflame let out a low laugh. "once, i thought that we might have been able to have a future together. but then i realized that you care only about yourself and your pride, tawnyrose. you're cruel." "i'm doing my best," tawnyrose said. she found her paws and took a stuttering step forward, but birchflame continued to walk away from her. "i can't make everyone happy all of the time. there are sacrifices that need to be made." "and yet you're failing. lightkit's dead, you never visit your sons, and you've pushed away so many cats before. doesn't sound like good ruling to me." "you've pushed everyone away too. clovershine? what about him?" tawnyrose followed birchflame outside of her den, and he rounded on her, lashing his tail. tawnyrose could feel glances in their direction, but she couldn't look away from birchflame. "at least my failures didn't mean the death of a kit," birchflame said. he made to turn again, but tawnyrose couldn't let him have the last word: "not yet," she hissed. "but you fail, too. you've just been lucky." the knight waved his tail as he left, and tawnyrose was left to stand alone in the middle of the clearing. she knew that her mother was frowning down upon her. ferretwhisker pulled hawthornkit and bramblekit closer to her, and softglow stood with yewbloom, the pair looking at tawnyrose with wide eyes. as the queen, she was supposed to be composed and regal. but she stood alone until she padded back into her den to hide her grief and shame once more.
it wasn't supposed to be this way, the young tom kept thinking as he pushed himself further and further away from home. it wasn't the first time that soucipaw was wandering alone, but he hadn't expected there to be a second time. he was supposed to grow up in chessclan, he thought. all through the days of his assessment, he dreamed of returning home to cheers and praise. then he would be given his new name, and the entire clan would look to him. he imagined growing up there, venturing through the territory he knew by muscle memory alone. chessclan had been his home for moons, and he had worked so hard to come so far, and then the bottom fell out from under him. just as he was ready to turn back and return to his friends and clanmates, he crossed one of the other apprenti, and they brought horrible news. when soucipaw thought of a sickness, he thought of the rumored greencough that swept through clans, wiping out kits and elders. he thought of winter bringing starvation to an already weakened clan, with warriors unable to run from labored breathing thick with mucus and throats left raw to the point of pain. when the other apprenti told soucipaw how their clanmates were growing weaker by the day, how they were dying, it didn't even seem like much of a choice: he had to leave. it was the only course of action that came to mind, as dreadful as it was. and he knew that it would be perceived poorly in anyone found out about his choice, but there are had been plenty of apprenti who never returned home after setting off on their assessments. his name would be added to the list of apprenti who had potential, but were ultimately too weak to handle the trials of chessclan's ways. at the very least, he supposed, it wasn't a complete lie; he knew that he couldn't handle watching his clanmates die around him, and he didn't want to risk his own health, so he turned his back on his clan and left for the horizon. though he knew that it would be a long travel and that he would have to put distance between himself as chessclan to make sure that he wouldn't be found or tracked, soucipaw couldn't help the way eyes locked on the horizon at the furthest corner of the world, shocked at how far away it was, how it only seemed to stray further and further away the closer he walked towards it. his muscles burned and his pawpads protested, rubbed raw with each and every step. more than once, he dreamed of a warm nest to collapse into by the day's end, he wondered if it would be worth giving up. along the way, he passed through a fair share of clan territories, marked by strict borders, ripe with scent fresh from a passing patrol. more than once, he thought about tracking the patrols down, but the fear persisted. he wondered if the disease had spread from chessclan, or if the clan might recognize his scent and return him back to the home he left behind. more than once, he considered stopping, and more than a hundred times he turned away out of fear and pressed on. that is, until he found peachkit among the berries bushes. she was small and her soft ginger fur tickled soucipaw's nose when he sniffed her. she had wailed then, loudly, and he cowered out of fear that her mother might come by and swat him away. but the longer peachkit wailed without any respite, soucipaw realized that she was alone, just as he was. he had abandoned his home, and she had been abandoned. he decided that they made a swell pair, and he managed to soothe her with gentle, calming words. from then on, they traveled together, and soucipaw talked to her often when they rested. "for someone so small, you're quite heavy to carry, did you know that?" he teased her one afternoon, as they rested in the shade of an oak tree. peachkit looked up at her friend from where she had taken to grooming her paws. "i have a feeling that you'd be heavier to carry," she said amicably. soucipaw smiled gently at her. "with your little legs, i wouldn't let you carry me, anyway," soucipaw said. "you'd be dragging me along, more like." peachkit scoffed, and when soucipaw leaned closer to touch his nose to her ear, she swatted at him. they laughed together, thesound coming easily to soucipaw once more, and then they were quiet for a while. "sometimes i miss my mommy," peachkit said quietly, and soucipw nodded along, sympathetic. "i had a dream last night that she came back. when i woke up, though, she wasn't here." "is that why you were so quiet this morning?" soucipaw asked. when peachkit said nothing, the golden apprentice rested his chin on his paws. "i don't remember my parents. i try to think about them sometimes, but i don't think i'd even remember their scent if i crossed its path." they were quiet for some time before peachkit sniffled and looked to soucipaw. "were you alone this whole time?" she asked. "or did someone find you, too?" soucipaw's smile was tight. "i found a clan, and i lived there for a while. i really liked it... i miss it, now." "why did they leave you?" soucipaw shook his head quickly. "i had to leave them i... i couldn't stay there." he rolled over onto his back, allowing himself the feeling of grass against his back as he stretched. the sunlight dappled through the leaves, peppering the ground. it was calming, and soucipaw closed his eyes. "i just want to be safe," he murmured. when peachkit padded closer to his side, soucipaw stretched out and let the little molly tucked herself into his side for comfort. slowly, his felt his eyelids droop, lulled by the warm afternoon air. and then he woke with a start, blinking up against the night sky peeking between the leaves, and peachkit continued to snooze at his side. at first, he blinked blearily up at the sky, wondering how long had passed, before he heard a twig snap nearby. soucipaw twisted quickly, his fur bristling at the same time that peachkit grunted her complaint of being woken up so abrubtly. then, to his surprise, soucipaw stared at a young, lithe tabby who gazed back at him with wide eyes. for a long moment, they stood and stared at one another until peachkit let out a quiet, surprised sound at the sight of the stranger. when the stranger took a step forward, soucipaw bared his teeth. "i don't want to hurt you," she said, and her voice was calm, soothing. soucipaw had to remind himself to keep his fur bristled. "are you alone?" he asked, and the molly's ears pricked curiously. "you're on highgarden's territory. i'm part of one of our patrols," she answered. "i know the mother's grounds has soft grass, but we usually aren't in the business of letting outsiders nap in our borders." despite her words, she didn't appear to be hostile. if anything, soucipaw could have sworn she sounded bemused. "are you from groveclan? or strikersclan?" she asked, and soucipaw finally shook his head. "i'm not from a clan," he said. soucipaw felt peachkit gaze up at him, confused, but he pressed on, not letting her have the chance to say anything. "i was traveling alone and found peachkit along the way. we didn't mean to linger here. my apologies." a long moment passed as the young molly seemed to consider his words before she nodded just once. "where are you headed, then?" "wherever our paws take up, at the present," soucipaw said. he swallowed around the lump in his throat: as long as its far away from chessclan. "well, like i said, we don't let strangers rest here, usually." "of course," soucipaw said. he glanced down to peachkit, who regarded the stranger with round eyes. when she took another step closer, soucipaw didn't bristle, and peachkit leaned forward, as if to get a closer look. in that moment, soucipaw realized that they could go no further. his stomach ached with hunger, he had walked far from his past home. he was tired, and he was sure that peachkit was as well. "do you intend to drive us away?" "no," she answered simply. her gaze flicked up from peachkit, and soucipaw held her gaze, searching for any signs of deceit or hostility before he sniffed. "do you know anywhere we might be able to rest for the night, then?" he asked, and she flicked her tail in amusement. "new friends are usually given a nest and a place in the dens," she said. "the nursery is particularly cozy, from what i've heard." at that moment, voices began to rise from the distance, and the highgarden cat straightened. "our queen, tawnyrose, is very welcoming to visitors, if you're that interested. in fact, i think you might like us." with that, soucipaw stepped forward to meet her halfway, and she flashed a bright smile when peachkit joined them. "i think i might, actually. what's your name?" "seedspring," she answered. "what's yours?" when soucipaw hesitated, seedspring shrugged. "if you don't like it, you're allowed to change it this once. just make it a good one." soucipaw considered all that he had left behind in his trek from chessclan. he thought about the distance he had covered and the way his pawpads were rubbed raw. he thought of all he had learned in chessclan, and what he learned about himself over the moons. he knew that he wanted to leave it all behind, that he wasn't the same cat who set off to take his assessment in chessclan. he had changed, and he hoped it was for the better. "marigoldpaw," he said as he followed seedspring to where a group of cats was gathered in the distance, clearly waiting for the young rose. "my name's marigoldpaw."
softglow looked at bramblekit and hawthornkit and had a moment of realization of just how much they had grown over the moons. each time he blinked his eyes, they seemed to grow in spurts, shooting up from the scraps of fur that mewled helplessly and pawed at his flank when they were only a few days old and their eyes hadn't opened yet. whenever he looked to them, he saw all that was, all that would be, all that could have been, and that which, perhaps, should be but never would. as the moons passed since lightkit's death and erasmus' imprisonment, softglow realized that, through it all, his foster sons were far more resilient than he would ever be. lightkit wasn't his daughter by blood, but she called him "father" and he saw her as his own daughter, though he tried so hard to remind himself otherwise. he told tawnyrose that he would play the part of the faithful king and father, but it was impossible to claim that it had been just an act. he adored lightkit and he let her go. her death rested heavily on softglow's shoulders, and he saw her in the way the sunlight dappled through the leaves, in the whispers of paws through the grass, and he heard her voice in the way the creeks and rivers babbled. for days, he was entirely inconsolable, but he regained his footing, albeit, slowly. he recognized similar grief in his sons, hawthornkit especially, but they were young. they were strong. the world tried to trample them into a pulp. they lost their sister, but softglow saw how they leaned against each other and propped themselves back up. if nothing else, bramblekit and hawthornkit remined softglow of tawnyrose and yewbloom. the pair of young toms didn't allow themselves to be held down by their grief for long, and softglow envied that about them. it was a wound that would never heal, and he saw the restlessness in their eyes and in the set of their shoulders, but they didn't hide in their nests. instead, softglow watched as bramblekit played with cirruskit and tornadokit, the trio chasing one another around the open camp, around the nursery, past the entrance of merlinsong's den, and nearly tripping otterfur and hurricanejaw as the pair of knights passed them. adenium called out to the young kits, but they didn't listen to them, and softglow's ears flicked his acknowledgement at the sound of merlinsong's voice coming up from behind him: "as king, i do believe it's within your title to help manage and maintain order within our camp," the herbalist commented, and softglow shrugged his shoulders. "tawnyrose never was very clear when it came to outlining my job description," the king said. he glanced off to the side, where hawthornkit rested companionably against snowykit's shoulder, his eyes half-lidded and ears twitching while the white kit spoke to hollandkit. "if anything, that sounds more like a bluetcrest-duty over something put on my paws." at that, merlinsong snorted, and softglow managed a half-amused smile when the herbalist claimed the spot beside the king. "sure, push it onto the out-of-commission attendent, very smart idea." "keeps my paws clean that way," softglow said. when he looked to his friend, it was to find that merlinsong's head was tilted to the side and his eyes scanned over softglow's face, as if assessing him. softglow felt his smile widen and he bumped his shoulder lightly against merlinsong's flank. "what's that look for? you look like you're thinking even more than usual." merlinsong didn't answer for a long moment until, as last, he smiled and dipped his head to rest it against softglow's shoulder. "you always have the most gorgeous smile, and i've missed it a lot lately. you look more like yourself." softglow felt his tongue still as he stared at merlinsong for a long moment, as if he couldn't believe the herbalist's words were real. the moment hung in the still air, and it was only when softglow heard bramblekit's joyous shout from across the clearing that he snapped back into himself. he touched his nose delicately to merlinsong's ear. "i love you," he murmured quietly, and merlinsong seemed to preen at the declaration, shifting into a more comfortable position so that he was reclined against softglow's body. for a while, they sat together like that, watching as the camp moved around them, active with the daily life of the clan. the newest member of the clan, marigoldpaw, nodded along as hurricanejaw spoke to him about their training in snippets that softglow could just barely make out. not far away from the pair, a hunting patrol pushed into camp, with arcticblink nodding to hurricanejaw as he led the rest of the patrol towards the heart of the camp. stormshroud followed arcticblink, but was quick to set down his prey before he was overwhelmed by his kits rushing to his side. from across the clearing, tornadokit let out a loud shout before her small paws carried her the distance, stopped short only when flickersky called her name, stopping the little molly from rushing directly into her father's flank. "there's still so much life in the clan," softglow heard himself say, and merlinsong shifted again to look up at him quizzically. softglow's brow furrowed when he considered his own words. "i just - i mean that after everything, it's still a little surprising, is all." he paused, considering this for another moment. "tawnyrose always says those words, you know? 'growing strong.' they have a good ring to it, and it's good for the clan's morale. sometimes it's just really hard to believe that it's true when bad things happen." merlinsong opened his mouth to answer, but a different voice cut through the air nearby just as softglow heard hawthornkit call out: "mama!" "the words have been passed down for generations," tawnyrose said. her expression was flat and vacant, as though she was deep in thought. it was hard to tell if she was addressing softlow and merlinsong directly, or if she merely needed to talk at them. "my mom always drilled it into our heads, like her mother before her, before her, before her, and on and on. i always thought that it was just some old hand-me-down phrase that was too antiquated to mean much. i mean, it meant things, but i think i heard it for my whole life, you know?" there was a brief pause, and softglow cleared his throat thoughtfully. "like it lost its meaning?" he prompted. tawnyrose blinked at him, as if finally recognizing who she was speaking to. she looked between merlinsong and softglow before offering a slight tip of her head. "exactly. even with the flood, i told myself the words, but the comfort came more from the familiarity than anything else, i think. there wasn't a concept behind it. they were just words and sounds without any reason. but... i think i've gotten the reasoning now." her gaze traveled from softglow and merlinsong to the rest of the clearing, from the bramble that shielded the nursery, to the dak corner where softglow could just make out newtmask's dark pelt as the knight guarded the wilted's den. she gazed to where kitechaser and riverfoam were sharing tongues, to where foxspark and raccoonslip wrestled playfully while several of the thorns looked on and cheered. at the same time, softglow looked to where hawthornkit and bramblekit stood together, looking towards their mother. when softglow waved his tail in their direction, the pair of toms bounded forward, and softglow bent his head to lick between hawthornkit's ears. "growing strong," softglow said to tawnyrose, who looked down at her sons for a long moment. her smile was tired and small, but quick to fade when bramblekit padded over to his mother to rest his head against her. tawnyrose stilled, as if holding her breath, before she looked back to softglow. "growing strong," she echoed. silence stretched over them, peaceful in the quiet, but softglow still felt as though they were all resting precariously on the edge of a cliff. he wasn't yet sure if they would be able to regain balance, or if they were destined to topple over into the abyss.
often, ever since she was first injured, smokemane was worried that she wouldn't be like the rest of her friends and family. she had trained so hard for so long, and the thought that she would have her career as a rose cut short because of the incident made her heart clench. she thought of all of the time merlinsong and spencer exchanged whispers behind her back, or of the time she half-woke in a daze to the sound of her mother and brother crying as they leaned over one another, as if they would both fall if the other pulled away. in the beginning, it had been increasingly difficult to keep track of the days and moons that passed her by, and she counted time not by the days, but by the weariness in her father's eyes and obsidianwing's stories when he came by to merlinsong's den with stories of patrols, of birds he failed to catch and squirrels he had to chase up trees after. for a long time, she felt like a prisoner, tethered to her own nest, unsure if her paws would even listen to her when she told them to move. no doubt, it was a relief to them all when merlinsong announced that her condition had been deemed stable, but it was equally disheartening when he relayed the following bad news: she would always find her coordination impaired, for the rest of her life. in her dreams, she missed catching a mouse by a breath, her movements too woobly and too slow; in her nightmares, her legs crumpled under her body so she couldn't move. on the worst nights, she wasn't even able to scream for help. still, smokemane found it impossible to bring up her dreams and terrors to anyone, and she noticed as her family began to return to normal. she moved back to the den with the knights and roses, with mandatory orders from merlinsong to take it easy, to return to him every other day or so, so he could monitor her progress and give her exercises that might make her duties easier. though smokemane wasn't a witness, foxspark was more than happy to act out a scene where merlinsong chewed bluetcrest out, with the warning that smokemane's position on patrols would be kept light. "are you alright?" his voice sounded from smokemane's side, and the rose turned her head to look at obsidianwing. "you seemed a million moons away, sorry, i didn't mean to startle you." his pale eyes were clear and eanest, and smokemane had the same thought that had been recurring to her again and again that she found herself entirely unable to vocalize: i love you, she said in her own head. aloud, to obsidianwing, smokemane merely smiled. "sorry, guess i was zoned out, there. did you say something?" she asked. for a moment, it seemed that obsidianwing was going to ask her about what she was thinking of, but he paused. then he smiled gently and touched his nose against hers, gently and tenderly. it felt like warm sunshine, and smokemane told herself that maybe, just maybe, it was love. she hoped it might be, or that it might become. "i was just saying that bluetcrest and sagecloud are doing some exercises, merlinsong-mandated, i'm sure." smokemane let out a quiet snort of laughter. "i don't doubt it," she agreed. "i was wondering if you wanted to go over there, too. i'm sure merlinsong has something for you, too. it might also be good for them to have a little extra company, what d'you think?" it was in the moments when obsidianwing went out of his way for his clanmates that smokemane admired him the most. often, obsidianwing had a knack for continuing to surprise smokemane by just how kind and gentle his heart truly was. he was a constant in the herbalists' den when smokemane was recovering, he was always caring and gentle towards smokemane, supportive when her mother needed another shoulder to lean on, and he was so observant and careful with all of his clanmates. smokemane nodded slowly. "you know me, i could never be bored of walking laps around camp until merlinsong tells us to stop," smokemane said, and she, truthfully, didn't mind at all. not as long as obsidianwing was there keeping pace with her and making easy conversation. bluetcrest was resting on his side, and sagecloud's ear flicked when smokemane and obsidianwing approached. "you're in luck, merlinsong went out with adenium to look for herbs since she got out of training with otterfur," sagecloud said with a lopsided grin. "we can put in a good word for you later, we'll tell him that you were diligent and did the exercises without even needing his sharp eyes on you the whole time." it was nice, smokemane thought to herself, that sagecloud appeared to be in relatively high spirits, despite the scars that lingered on her face. smokemane knew that she was lucky after her incident, and whenever she looked at bluetcrest or sagecloud and saw their scars, she knew that they were all blessed by the same luck that let them survive to see another day. even if sagecloud was half-blind, even if bluetcrest would have a heavy limp for the rest of his life, and even if smokemane would always be wobbly on her paws, they had been able to keep their lives. "by the grace of the gods, i swear he has eyes in the back of his head," bluetcrest commented with a brief chuckle at his own quip. when he stretched his legs out, his fur parted, revealing the deep scar left by erasmus' claws. the first time smokemane saw the wound, she had shuddered. instead, she looked back to sagecloud. "we could at least join you for a little while," smokemane said. "we did walk all the way across camp," obsidianwing added. bluetcrest let out another laugh in the same time that sagecloud snorted and looked to obsidianwing. "what a hero. then it's the least i could do to put you to work. merlinsong said bluetcrest wasn't allowed to push too hard today to make sure he doesn't bleed anymore," the older rose explained while bluetcrest groaned dramatically. "so you have the privilege of getting to be my sparring partner today." obsidianwing looked to smokemane, who settled down with her tail curled over her paws as sagecloud continued: "the rules are easy. i'll try to knock you down, and you have to try and pin me down. you give it all you've got and aim for my blind side, and then i'll cuff your ears." without waiting for an answer, sagecloud led obsidianwing to an open space, not too far away from smokemane and bluetcrest. as they started training, bluetcrest finally sat up and shook grass from his cheek and ears. "it's good to see that she's finally getting her spirits back. she's strong, but i was worried that losing an eye would hurt her too badly, in places merlinsong can't reach," bluetcrest said, momentarily losing his usually joking tone. "you seem to be faring well, too," smokemane said. bluetcrest hummed softly and shrugged. "if anything, i'm tired of sitting around here, feeling like i can't do anything, you know?" he paused when he looked to smokemane. he swallowed thickly. "when i saw you go down, when i saw your blood and the ice... when i saw you getting up again and starting to get better, i remember thinking that you were stronger than i could ever be. i didn't envy what happened to you, but i was jealous of your strength, and i remember hoping that i could be strong like you." "i'm not strong," smokemane said, but bluetcrest waved his tail to cut her off. "on the contrary, you're one of the strongest of us. you, you and sagecloud. hawthornkit and bramblekit and quillpaw. yewbloom, tawnyrose, softglow, and all of the others who have been beaten down so hard, or so many times. again, and again, and again, and again you still get up. that's the most impressive display of strength that any of us could ever see," bluetcrest explained. he nodded slowly to himself, and smokemane turned to look where sagecloud and obsidianwing circled one another. when sagecloud said something to obsidianwing, the knight tensed and appeared to hesitate before launching himself deftly towards sagecloud's right side. she nimbly slid out of the way and turned, countering. they appeared to dance together in their training while smokemane thought about bluetcrest's words. "you deserve to give yourself the credit of being strong, too, then," smokemane said. "without you bringing me back, i wouldn't be here. you tried to help save sagecloud, too, and you keep working to keep this clan going. you're among the strongest of us," she echoed bluetcrest, who huffed a laugh. "i remember when you were little more than a kit. when did you grow up?" bluetcrest asked her after a long beat of silence. together, they laugh and laughed, and felt a little bit stronger.
the warm summer air clogged wolverinesnap's nose and pulled at his fur as he scrabbled up the rising hills after yewbloom. the highgarden prince always appeared to move with elegant ease, and his ginger fur stood out against the greenery that surrounded them. when wolverinesnap reached the rise, yewbloom was already there, his tail kinked over his back and his whiskers twitching in amusement. "still having trouble keeping up, wolverinesnap?" yewbloom teased, and wolverinesnap breathed out a long, dramatic sigh. "i just don't know where you get all of this energy from. you went on the moonhigh patrol and you barely slept before the sunhigh patrol. even now, it's like you never need to stop, you just keep going," wolverinesnap said, but there was no malice in his tone. yewbloom grinned wickedly. "you'll have to ask tawnyrose about all of the times i got into trouble for having too much energy. it was like tawnyrose was always ready to go back into the nursery and take a nap, but our parents could never get me within a paw's reach to get me to sit," yewbloom explained to the sound of wolverinesnap's laugh. the ginger knight bounded over to his dear friend and circled around him, dragging his tail over wolverinesnap's back and flank as he went. "where does all of the energy come from, though? you have more energy than all of the kits in the nursery combined." finally, yewbloom paused, and the breeze ruffled his fur. wolverinesnap knew that he was sunshine stored in a cat's body, with all of the warmth and light compacted and refined into its purest form. "i'd concede on all of the kits except tornadokit. flickersky's been having trouble keeping her in line since day one... sounds familiar," yewbloom laughed, and the sound was the sweetest sound in existence. "when we were young, i guess it was just age... kits are always energetic, and i rarely had any boundaries, anyway. as long as i stayed in the camp, i was free to run wherever i wanted, so i did." yewbloom shrugged casually. "and what's your excuse now?" yewbloom considered this for a moment before he looked towards the horizon. "i could say that it's just the way the fields and hills and mountains stretch so far away. i've always wanted to see it all. i wanted to have every inch committed to memory, so i'd know every step of the way, and every blade of grass, every pebble, and every drop of water would know me, too. but... i've seen a lot of the world. it still calls to me, but that's not the reason anymore." with that, yewbloom turned to face wolverinesnap. "it's you, mostly. you make me feel alive and free and energetic. from the first time we met, i felt it, like i could run and my paws weren't touching the ground anymore." wolverinesnap ducked his head, instantly bashful. "you're exaggerating," he said. "not in the least," yewbloom said without missing a beat. "you make me feel complete and energetic. when we were apart, i felt like i'd lost a piece of myself. i was missing you, and you made me whole. i felt so lost, and that feeling only went away when i came here, and you were here." there was a flash deep in the green of yewbloom's eyes, and the prince sighed softly. "we've never spoken about that time, have we?" wolverinesnap stepped forward and rested his chin on yewboom's shoulder. "it seems we were both doing a great job of avoiding it, weren't we?" yewbloom let out a breathy laugh, but it teetered on sad. "i'm not mad that you left, you know. i just... i wish that you had stayed. i understand your reasoning, but it hurt... i thought we were good back then, but then i woke up and you were gone, and i felt lost." the wind tore across the fields and rolling hills as wolverinesnap swallowed around the lump in his throat. he shivered, but it wasn't because of the wind. "i was scared," wolverinesnap said. he shook his head and kneaded the ground anxiously with his forepaws. "i'm still scared, yewbloom. i'm scared that the leaves will drop too quickly and i'll turn into a monster again. i am a monster, there's no way around it. i'm dangerous, i am. even now, i can feel it in my gut, just waiting for a chance to claw it's way out. and it'll succeed, it always does." "and you always manage to push it down again," yewbloom said. there was a glimmer in his eyes, and wolverinesnap wished he had yewbloom's unwavering optimism. "because you're not a monster. that, that thing, it isn't you." "but it is me, it's the ugly part of me. it's the part that i fear more than anything else, because it will destroy. and i'm scared that, one day, it'll wake up and never go back to sleep. i'm scared that i'll hurt one of the kits, or tawnyrose, or anyone else." wolverinesnap drew in a long breath before he exhaled. he shuddered. "i'm scared that i'll hurt you, yewbloom. you're my best friend and my family, and i can't let myself hurt you. but i'm scared that i won't have a choice, one day." there was a long pause of silence in the air between them. the breeze whistled between their noses, and wolverinesnap shivered again. he felt cold, that is, until yewbloom's warm body pressed against his side, fitting perfectly against his shoulder and flank. "if you hadn't left, i was thinking of leaving you behind," yewbloom admitted. wolverinesnap's muscles tensed at the admittance nd he flicked his tail. "i knew a cat named jet, and he had two kits with him, but they were a little older than kits, you know? i met them before we met, before all of this. it was only a little bit after the flood, and i was lost and confused and i was still having trouble figuring out which way was up. i didn't know how to cope with what i was feeling. i had nightmares of water, dreams where i woke up tasting sand and mud and river water. and jet, him and his kits, they were all good cats. they were my friends. but the longer i was with them, i kept thinking that they were too good to be true. i'd already lost all of my family, my friends. i'd lost everything i had ever known and thought to be good." as yewbloom told the story, his tone with flat and factual, lacking his usual upbeat tones. "so i left them, because i needed to be the one to cut ties before they were taken from me. and when i met you, i saw a future with you, and that scared me more than i could ever say. because i wanted to stay with you, i needed to be by your side, but i was scared, too. i was scared that i'd wake up and you'd be gone." "and then i was gone," wolverinesnap said, and yewbloom allowed himself to lean even more against wolverinesnap. "and then you were gone," he echoed. "and i told myself that it was better that way, maybe. because it meant that you didn't have the same feeling of future with me, and it would be easier to just tear it down sooner rather than later. i told myself that it was better that you left, because i didn't want to hurt you by being the first to leave. but... it wasn't good. it always felt so wrong. and the nightmares got worse. you took a piece of me with you, and i've only seen it again now, with you." "i didn't want to leave. i just didn't think i had a choice," wolverinesnap said. "because i saw it, too. i still see it. a future with you is the only one i want, no matter where our paws take us or what the world throws at us, i need to be with you. you make me feel less scared." yewbloom smiled at last, and he turned his face to nuzzle into wolverinesnap's neck. "our future, then, what do you think? we'll keep each other safe and we don't leave each other, not anymore." wolverinesnap hummed softly. "i'm still a little scared. what if something happens? i can't - "i love you," yewbloom said, cutting him off. "i love you, no matter what you're scared of. i know that you couldn't hurt me, and we'll take it day by day, no matter what comes. we'll do it, together." at last, wolverinesnap leaned back against yewbloom, as they shared their weight between themselves. he realized that he was tired, so indescribably tired. "i love you," he whispered, and it felt natural on his tongue, like the words had always been imprinted there. "i love you."
the clearing was a bustle of activity following tawnyrose's call for the clan to gather together. pythoneyes fussed over daisypaw and briarpaw as the sister settled towards the front of the clearing. at the same time, snowykit, hawthonkit, and bramblekit settled at pythoneyes' opposite side, followed by adenium and otterfur. when their eyes met, otterfur shot pythoneyes a gentle smile. "softglow asked if i'd help keep them in line for a few minutes, since he can't sit here with them." "someone's gotta make sure they don't explode from their excitement?" pythoneyes asked as he looked over daisypaw's meticulusly groomed fur. both of the young mollies purred and told pythoneyes throughout the day that he was hovering and pacing. as if reading his thoughts, otterfur sniffed absently. "if i didn't know any better, i would've thought that you were more nervous than those two," otterfur said. before pythoneyes could defend himself, briarpaw leaned across to address the older knight: "and you'd be very correct," she said while daisypaw laughed. "i nearly thought he was going to gnaw his tail off before from how much he was grooming it before." "it was pretty close," daisypaw chimed in. pythoneyes balked when the group laughed and he turned his cheek indignantly. "this is the respect i get for caring about you both, is that it?" he sighed dramatically, only to lower his shoulders and purr when daisypaw bumped their shoulders together. "i'm just very proud of you both, you've grown up so much and i know your parents would be so proud of you. i know your mother and father are both watching and smiling with pride." as he spoke, pythoneyes watched the sisters share a long, meaningful glance that he couldn't decipher before briarpaw stretched out a paw in his direction. "thank you, pythoneyes. they'd be proud of you, too. thank you for always keeping us safe. you're like our father, too," briarpaw said. pythoneyes smiled at her and he rested his chin atop the crown of daisypaw's head. there was a long beat of silence, interrupted when hawthornkit swiped playfully at snowykit. "no way, you can't have hurricanejaw or otterfur as a mentor. otterur's mentoring adenium and i think hurricanejaw's going to be my mentor." bramblekit looked between his brother and friend. "you don't know that. maybe hurricanejaw'll be my mentor." snowykit flicked his tailtip and looked to adenium and otterfur. "can we share mentors?" he asked. there was a playful underlining to his words, and otterfur purred at the little tom. "i'd love to teach all of you everything i know," he said earnestly. "but adenium's enough of a pawful already. when merlinsong warned me that she was menace, i should've paid more attention," he teased his thron, but adenium merely grinned broadly. "but, no matter who your mentor is, i know that tawnyrose will have given it a lot of thought. all of the knights were well-trained and they have a lot to teach you all. you have nothing to worry about." as if by a cue, it seemed that the clan had fully assembled and a hush fell over the clearing when tawnyrose stood tall with bluetcrest at one shoulder and softglow on her other. from where he sat at the front of the crowd, pythoneyes watched bluetcrest scan the crowd until, at last, his gaze landed on pythoneyes. the attendant smiled, as if he could tell that pythoneyes needed the assurance.just when the crowd had quieted, tawnyrose waved her tail. "i am filled with joy this evening, i am. joy, but also grief for wounds that have yet to heal. as we welcome thorns to the rank of roses, and seedlings are poised to start their training, i'm sure we are all reminded of lightkit, who should have stood here today as well," tawnyrose began. at her words, pythoneyes felt the crowd shift as they turned their eyes towards the wilted's den, and, at the edge of pythoneyes' peripherals, he could see merlinsong duck his head to whisper to spencer, who appeared even smaller than normal. it was only when tawnyrose continued that the bristling pelts smoothed and the clan calmed again. "and while we all continue to remember lightkit, i ask that we do not mitigate the ceremony before us. let us celebrate lightkit's life, and thank the gods for the life we were able to share with her. and i also ask you all to help me, now, as i look to my sons. may the gods grant them boundless strength as the younger generation rises in the ranks." "and may the gods grant us all that they don't grow up too quickly," yewbloom called out to his sister from the front of the crowd. tawnyrose smiled while bluetcrest stifled a laugh at the prince's antics. "i'm sure we can all agree with that sentiment," tawnyrose purred with a nod towards her brother. "your wisdom never ceases to amaze us all, yewbloom." the ginger tabby prince grinned while several of the cats gathered around him purred and joined in the laughter. at his side, pythoneyes heard hawthornkit and bramblekit snicker at their uncle, only to fall to attention when tawnyrose straightened and gestured the kits forward. it was clear that the trio of toms was trying their best to remain composed, but hawthornkit's shoulders trembled with excitement and snowykit beamed at bramblekit. "from this moment forward, until they have received their full names, you shall be known as snowypaw, hawthornpaw, and bramblepaw," tawnyrose announced. "i urge you all to wear your new names with pride for your training, highgarden is proud of you." tawnyrose's pause was greeted with cheers from the clan as the gathered cats greeted the young toms into their new rank. when the clan had quieted, tawnyrose cleared her throat. "of course, you will not be alone in your training, and your mentors will take on the task of overseeing your training until you have learned all that they could possibly pass onto you. snowypaw, i believe that you will find a great mentor in yewbloom. though you weren't born into highgarden, you have already grown into a polite, observant thorn, and i know that yewbloom will be able to match your keen eye and adventurous spirit well. we all know that my brother has seen much of the world and has a loud mouth to match. if you allow him, i know that he will have much to teach you." if yewbloom was surprised by the announcement, he gave no indication. instead, he rose to steady paws and padded forward to greet his new thorn. only a moment earlier, yewbloom was teasing the queen in the middle of the clan meeting, but in the moment he touched his nose to snowypaw's, he held the appearance of the poised prince that he had been trained to be. all the same, he leaned close to snowypaw's ear and whispered something into the thorn's ear that made him smile broadly before the pair took their seats again and allowed tawnyrose the space to continue. "hawthornpaw and bramblepaw, you are both my sons, and i am so dearly proud of you for all that you have grown to be, all that you have endured, and all that i know you will be," tawnyrose started as he looked down at the twin tabbies. "hawthornpaw, your mentor will be hornetshade. though he's still young, hornetshade has worked hard to prove himself from the moment he arrived in highgarden as a thorn, our first thorn. he had a great mentor in dippernose, and i know that hornetshade always has a new trick in his mind. listen closely and pay attention to him, as i know he will listen to you as well." whereas yewbloom was composed and even, it was clear that hornetshade hadn't been expecting the honor of mentoring one of tawnyrose's sons, and he glanced back to his friends as he padded through the crowd to meet hawthornpaw, who grinned happily at the knight, pleased with his mother's choice. when they settled again, tawnyrose looked into the crowd and then back to bramblepaw. "birchflame, you will mentor bramblepaw through his training. as highgarden's past tornament champion, you showed us all your strength time and time again. you are resourceful and quick on your toes, two skills that all highgarden cats must master in their early moons. i know that you will treat bramblepaw well, and care for him as a mentor, and you will teach him all that you know, and more." "maybe not everything," birchflame countered as he met bramblepaw. he paused and took a moment to look down at the little thorn before he glanced back up to tawnyrose. "wouldn't you'd rather that i keep a few secrets to myself?" the comment was met with more laughter and cheering from the crowd as each thorn settled with their mentors, but pythoneyes could see the way tawnyrose seemed to stiffen, and how bluetcrest and softglow exchanged a quick glance behind the queen. however, it was over when pythoneyes blinked again, and tawnyrose jumped down from her perch to gesture towards daisypaw and briarpaw. "daisypaw and briarpaw, i will now ask you both: do you swear to serve highgarden as a knight until you are no longer able, loyal to the clan above all else, even if it means giving up your own life? do you pledge yourself under the light of the seven gods: the mother, the maiden, the father, the warrior, the smith, the crone, and the stranger?" "i do!" "i do," briarpaw's voice ang out in tandem with her sister's, and pythoneyes felt a warm pang in his chest. "then from this moment forward, daisypaw, you will be known as -" before tawnyrose could finish, however, daisypaw leaned forward to whisper in the queen's ear. silence stretched across the clearing when tawnyrose pulled back to look at the pair of sisters, seeming to consider what daisypaw said. when she then looked directly to briarpaw, the other thorn nodded as well. tawnyrose's smile was small, but gentle and soft. at last, she nodded her head. "very well, then," pythoneyes heard her say. "from this moment forward, daisypaw, you will be known as daisypetal, in honor of your mother. and briarpaw, you will be known as briarbranch, in memory of your father. though neither of your parents resided in highgarden, i know that the gods will have granted them the ability to look down upon you now, and for the rest of your days, and i know that they are proud of you, just as the rest of highgarden is inspired by your strength and dedication, and we are blessed to have you both as full roses of our clan." as soon as tawnyrose stepped back from the pair, pythoneyes found his paws and he launched forward to greet briarbranch and daisypetal. the sound of the clan's cheers rang clearly in his ears, but pythoneyes felt the pair vibrate from the breth of their purrs. "we thought you might like that," daisypetal purred while pythoneyes nuzzled briarbranch. "loved it, more like. how long have you two been planning that?" he asked. they exchanged a glance before briarbranch shrugged. "a while, i guess? it's a way to hold our parents with us, and we didn't think that tawnyrose would deny it," she said before daisypetal knocked her shoulder against pythoneyes'. "and daisyeyes didn't have the same ring to it, no offense, she added. pythoneyes cuffed her ear affectionately before sweeping his tail around the two. "i'm always here for you two, i hope you know that. i know i could never replace your parents, and i'm glad you chose to honor them like this, but i see you both as my daughters," he said. "we're family," briarbranch agreed while daisypetal leaned heavily against pythoneyes's shoulder. over briarbranch's head, pythoneyes could only watch as hawthornpaw and bramblepaw bound towards tawnyrose, bluetcrest, and softglow. bluetcrest nodded his head towards the pair, and tawnyrose was slow to react before she nodded stiffly towards her sons. it was only when softglow grinned and curled his tail over the thorns that tawnyrose went to them to touch her nose to theirs before she went back to bluetcrest. the attendant nodded again towards the toms, but it was clear, even at a distance, that tawnyrose's mind was elsewhere, and she left softglow to speak to their sons. bramblepaw's grin had smoothed into a thin line, and hawthornpaw had one paw lifted, as if poised to trail after his mother until, at last, he put it down and stared at the ground.
betonypetal was freezing. it was a cold that stuck deep in her bones, nestling in the space between her joints and weaving between the individual hairs on her pelt. when she blinked her eyes open there was only darkness, and betonypetal was entirely alone. "hello?" she asked aloud, but there was no response. "hello, is anyone there? clovershine?" she asked again, calling out her mate's name. but there was no answer, and the cold that soaked through her skin offered no relief. she shivered. the noise came in from far away, approaching like a rumble of thunder. it lasted, at first, for no longer than a heartbeat, and then again, for the same amount of time. there was no telling how long betonypetal stood in the dark mist, shivering and listening to the approaching rumble, but it grew steadily, building until it was a singular roar in her ears. just as the mist began to clear so that betonypetal could recognize the familiar shapes of highgarden's camp around her, a shape crested from above the trees. she shivered again, but it was not from cold, but from fear. the noise grew and grew, reaching a fever pitch that sent betonypetal on the ground, flattening her body and screaming her throat raw with the hope that maybe, just maybe, it would drive the sound away. just as betonypetal feared that it would crush her and that she would be lost under the weight of the noise, it stopped. the silence rang even louder in betonypetal's ears, pierced only by a singular, far-off cry. but when betonypetal opened her eyes again, gasping, she found herself in the nursery. she blinked to see swiftheart's familiar flank curled in among the moss of the nursery, and clovershine's familiar weight against betonypetal's shoulder was grounding. she breathed in deeply, only to notice a pair of brown eyes watching from the betonypetal's other shoulder. "are you alright?" ayalla asked quietly, so as to not disturb the other cats in the nursery. betonypetal forced herself to nod wordlessly, though she couldn't be entirely certain in that moment. ayalla hummed. "you look like you saw a ghost. bad dream?" "it was just a dream," betonypetal said. "it doesn't mean anything." still, through ayalla's silence, betonypetal looked at clovershine, at swiftheart and smallheart, and flickersky with her family. when she looked back at ayalla, the busy-tailed rose was still watching betonypetal. "i've been having a lot of bad dreams recently. but they're just dreams," she said again. "just dreams," ayalla echoed. "it doesn't have to mean anything. it could just be dreams." betonypetal nodded her head slowly. she rested her chin on her paws and let out a long sigh, willing her eyes to sleep again.
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eagle
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Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Nov 10, 2020 21:33:44 GMT -8
betonypetal's eyes were heavy, aching from lack of sleep, but she found that it was increasingly difficult to rest. every time she tried to fall asleep, she heard voices whispering to her with warnings of darkness and doom, warning her of something that had yet to come to highgarden, but the whispers were always drawn out by a loud roaring before she could ever make out exactly what was being said. it was frustrating, and betonypetal was more tired than she had ever been before. she felt sluggish and slow, even when she sat with the other roots. at her side, ferretwhisker nudged her gently. "you seem tired, you're normally more talkative than this," ferretwhisker commented, not unkindly. "have you been getting enough rest?" betonypetal flicked her tail noncommittedly. she was glad that ayalla had returned to full duties after she had finished surrogating kits for percy of the crossroad demons. though they never spoke about the night ayalla saw betonypetal wake up from the nightmares, she knew that ayalla was clever and smart. she would have picked up on the behavior long ago if she was still in the nursery. when betonypetal didn't answer right awake, swiftheart let out a gentle, teasing snort. "i'm not surprised if you're not sleeping well, since clovershine takes up practically all of your nest when he sleeps in the nursery," she teased, and flickersky let out a rumbling purr. happy to shift the subject for as long as she could, betonypetal rolled her eyes at flickersky. "and you mean to insinuate that stormshroud doesn't?" but flickersky seemed more than ready to shake her head. "oh no, i'd be the first to admit that he does," she said, flashing a broad smile. "but it's no argument that it's smallheart who snores the loudest." "does not!" swiftheat defended her mate. "he does," ferretwhisker cut in. "you're just a very deep sleeper. and this all makes me glad, for once, that nightfur is in bearclan so you all don't complain about him." at that, flickersky leaned over to rest her chin affectionately on ferretwhisker's shoulder. "it's alright, i like having a nest to myself for now, i'm enjoying stretching out in my sleep for as long as i can before the kits come and start batting me with their paws before dawn." when flickersky groaned in agreement, swiftheart and betonypetal laughed. "oh, you'll see soon enough, and you won't be laughing then. just last night, hurricanekit woke me up because he swore there was a tiger outside the nursery. could you imagine? a tiger on highgarden's territory." "maybe it was tigergaze," betonypetal joked good-naturedly. "what did you tell him?" "well, i told him that there have never been tigers on our territory, let alone prowling around the nursery at night," she answered. "he didn't believe me, of course, but he fell asleep after he made sure that i wasn't going to doze off again anytime soon." despite her words, flickersky's tone was loving and fond. "i'd just like to get as much sleep as i can before swiftheart has her kits." swiftheart scoffed. "i can guarantee that my kits won't be nearly as loud as yours," she said with a flick of her tail. "that's a tall promise," ferretwhisker cut in, but betonypetal shrugged. "i won't promise anything from my kits. with my luck, they'll all be as loud as clovershine." she paused for a moment before grinning. "i bet they'll all snore, too," betonypetal added, earning a chorus of purrs from her friends. another moment passed in pleasant silence as the roots thought of their kits and families until, at last, flickersky stretched her forelegs out in front of her. "i'm going to miss being in the nursery, you're all such great friends and i can't thank you enough for all of the help. i know that my kits aren't always easy or quiet, and i'm so glad that stormshroud is around to help, now, but i couldn't do it without any of you," flickersky said before touching her nose to ferretwhisker's shoulder. "thank you all for being my family, and theirs, too." as the group continued to encourage flickersky and promise that they would always been close friends, even when she was sleeping in another den and patrolling, betonypetal felt darkness linger at the edge of her vision. when she blinked again, her stomach tossed with a dark, unsettling feeling, and a single thought intruded into her mind: this was one of the last times that she would be this close and comfortable with her friends again. she felt desperate and fearful of something she didn't yet understand. the sun was shining and her friends smiled brightly. it was only when swiftheart looked at betonypetal that the rose realized that her fur was bristling and her claws were dug into the ground. "is something wrong?" swiftheart asked, and betonypetal ducked her head and nodded. "yeah... yeah, sorry. i just... i'm getting tired and i think i need to take a nap. i'm sorry," she said, not waiting for any of her friends to say anything before she scrambled to her paws and padded into the nursery. inside, hollandkit and peachkit were asleep, and betonypetal collapsed into her nest. she watched as hollandkit's small paws churned, as if running in his sleep. again, as she watched the pair of kits, betonypetal felt overcome with dread and confusion. she forced her eyes to close, though she knew she wouldn't find any sleep. cougarstrike's neck began to ache from the weight of the kit he carried from his jaws. with each step, his weariness grew and his son let out a soft whimper when cougarstrike stumbled. "we're almost there," cougarstrike promised softly. "we'll be home soon, i promise." the gentle assurances seemed to soothe the small kit for the moment, and the ruddy tom pressed on, feeling the wind pull at his long fur. he knew, at the time, that his relationship with nettlemist had been a poor idea. highgarden needed him, the clan was still recovering. and yet, it hadn't stopped him from crossing the border to meet the pretty bearclan molly. for the first time in his life, cougarstrike had wanted to be impulsive. he envied foxspark and raccoonslip, who always seemed so carefree. nothing was able to topple their spirits and they picked on cougarstrike for being too serious. and perhaps he was - foxspark always said that cougarstrike would have more friends and be better-liked if he just loosened up for once. so, against cougarstrike's better judgement, he did. he acted out of character and tried to think of what foxspark might do if he had crossed paths with a pretty molly, regardless if she belonged to another clan. now, the only thought on cougarstrike's mind was that he didn't know what he was going to do. he was a father, and he had never felt more lost. still, he felt a beat of affection for the little tom he carried back to camp. he was so young - all three of his sons were. it was for the best that nettlemist kept the other kits in bearclan, but cougarstrike needed this even more than he dreaded it. he knew nothing of raising a kit, he didn't know what maplelily and hurricanejaw would say, or what the rest of the clan would think. regardless, this was his kit, and he was going to do all that he could to take care of him and teach him how to survive and be a good cat. he hoped that his son would learn from his mistakes, if nothing else. as soon as the valley came into view, cougarstrike kept his eyes open, waiting for a highgarden patrol to come into view. it was only a matter of time until a hunting or border patrol came or went through the rose pass, and cougarstrike knew he had nothing to fear. highgarden and bearclan were on good terms and he wouldn't be the first to have a relationship outside of the clan. when ferretwhisker emerged from merlinsong's den witth the announcement that she was expecting kits were nightfur from bearclan, it was a moment of celebration. tawnyrose had always been fair, and the queen wasn't known to turn down a kit or cat in need of assistance. his son would be accepted into the clan, and that knowledge brought a sense of comfort to cougarstrike, who felt so confused otherwise. sure enough, a small patrol came towards cougarstrike from the direction of the rose pass, and a familiar shout rose to the sky when foxspark spotted his twin brother. with mapleshadow in the lead, the patrol met cougarstrike, and foxspark bounded forward when only several tail-lengths separated them. cougarstrike sent a prayer up to the gods and set his son down gently, resting him between his paws. "i thought you went hunting. i didn't know you were hunting for kits," foxspark said with a laugh. he lowered himself, craning his neck down to get a closer look at the kit. "where'd you find this little guy?" "by the bearclan border," cougarstrike answered, not entirely lying. at the same moment, mapleshadow and arcticblink came to get a look at the kit as well. they exchanged a glance. "he's covered in their scent," mapleshadow observed in the same time that arcticblink sniffed the air. "maybe he's one of theirs. we should send a patrol over, to make sure that he's not a lost bearclan kit." a tell must have showed on cougarstrike's face, and the older knight hesitated. "is he a bearclan kit, cougarstrike?" for a heartbeat, it was all cougarstrike could do to stare down at his son. his small son, who parted his small mouth in a massive yawn. he let out a soft whimper when the breeze stirred his fur, and cougarstrike stood protectively over him, sweeping his tail around the kit to shield him from the cold. "he was, but his mother gave him to me to take to highgarden," he said. mapleshadow's eyes narrowed curiously and foxspark blinked, still clearly unsure what had transpired. cougarstrike swallowed around the lump in his throat. "she gave him to me because he's my son," he said. perhaps he expected arcticblink and mapleshadow to interrogate him further, but foxspark lit up before they had the chance to react. "i'm an uncle?" he gushed, taking in the little kit who gazed up at him with large green eyes that were so similar in color to foxspark's. then he gasped, thrusting his nose at cougarstrike. "you're a father, and you didn't tell me?" cougarstrike was thankful for foxspark's energy, but he met mapleshadow's searching gaze without flinching. "he's my son," cougarstrike repeated. "and i'd like to take him home. nettlemist and i want me to take him to highgarden, he's a highgarden cat now." his tone must have convinced the older cats, who nodded. arcticblink nudged foxspark. "you should help cougarstrike help him get settled, just send someone else our way to help hunt," he said. then, to cougarstrike: "i know maplelily and hurricanejaw will be happy to meet him. you shouldn't keep them waiting." cougarstrike dipped his head towards them both. when foxspark bent his head to pick the kit up, cougarstrike felt a moment's flash of protectiveness over his son before he relaxed. he nodded to foxspark and, together, they headed home. back at the camp, the clearing was bustling with mid-day activity. the roots lounged in the sunbeams as flickersky's kits chased one another, with hollandkit and peachkit trying to keep up despite their shorter legs. off towards the thorns' den, hawthornpaw and bramblepaw mimicked elkpaw's movements as the older tom showed them a more advanced crouching positions and adenium watched on with snowypaw at her side. bluetcrest and softglow were working to organize a patrol, and several moments passed before anyone seemed to notice that foxspark was holding a strange kit. foxspark put the kit down, and cougarstrike watched as, slowly, eyes began to turn in their direction. ferretwhisker and ayalla exchanged whispered words and dippernose nudged newtmask, who craned his neck to get a better glimpse. at last, foxspark set the kit down at cougarstrike's paws and sent his brother an encouraging nod before padding over to talk to kitechaser. at last, smokemane walked over to cougarstrike, who was surprised by how steady her walking appeared. her movements were slow and clearly calculated, but there was a shine in her eyes when she touched her nose in greeting to cougarstrike's. she looked from her half-brother to the kit and back again. "what's his name?" cougarstrike smiled, glad for her gentle kindness. "polarkit," he said. "named after a bear known for weathering many harsh storms, even in the coldest nights." "what a handsome name," smokemane said. "he's my son," cougarstrike said, loud enough for anyone listening to hear. smokemane smiled and sat down in front of polarkit. "welcome to highgarden, polarkit. i think you'll like it a lot here." though cougarstrike had never been particularly close with his older half-siblings, smokemane had always been so kind and caring, and he blinked at her, momentarily caught with emotion that struck in his throat. he was aware that there were other pairs of eyes on him, but they no longer struck him as judgmental, but he realized that they were curious. nosy, yes, but the clan was his family, and smokemane wouldn't let him be alone in this. her eyes met cougarstrikes, full of words unsaid, and he realized just how much he truly admired her. still caught with emotion, he could offer her only the slightest nod, and smokemane returned the gesture before craning her neck to polarkit's level once more. "hi there, sweetie. my name's smokemane. welcome to our family, i'm so glad you're here." foxspark returned with wolfhowl and raccoonslip in tow, and the pair immediately crouched down next to smokemane. sunglow's bright pelt flashed through the clearing when he came closer, followed by seedspring, stagscorch, and rabbitrace. when maplelily and hurricanejaw came back from a border patrol to find their kits huddle together around polarkit, the news had already spread. without hesitating, maplelily went to greet her grandkit and hurricanejaw paused at cougarstrike's side. for a long moment, cougarstrike searched his father's face, looking for any signs of dissapointment that he had gone off with a bearclan cat, or any other negative thoughts. but hurricanejaw smiled. "when your mother had you and your siblings, my biggest regret was that i never got to see you all growing up. and i never would have, if things were different," hurricanejaw said. he nodded to where raccoonslip had rolled onto his back, letting polarkit climb over his fluffy flank and bite at sunglow's long tail. "i missed these moments, and that's something that i'll never get back. i'm glad that you can be with him, now. cherish it in a way that i wasn't able to, and don't regret it." at that, hurricanejaw went to join the others, and cougarstrike thought about his words, taking in the sight of his siblings, half-siblings, and cousins playing with his son. it occured to him that he wasn't alone. he didn't know how to be a father, but he would learn. and he wouldn't be alone in raising polarkit, either, and that thought gave him hope.
hornetshade liked to think that he had put his anxieties behind him, as if it was possible to blow them away like dandelion seeds, but he was willing to admit that he knew himself better than that. the weight of his crime weighed heavily on his shoulders, even still, and he grew constantly more aware of how lonely he was, like an itch that he couldn't reach. warblercry was distant following the near-attack on groveclan, and he knew that it was because she was still finding a way to cope. otterfur had adenium to tend to, dippernose was busy with his own duties, and hornetshade didn't yet feel prepared to go to midnightstream or ferretwhisker - the former, because of the miles of unresolved feelings and guilt, and the latter because of lingering threads of past ghosts. finally, hornetshade realized that he needed to swallow down his own reservations and one portion of guilt in order to seek out iguanaspots. he hadn't spoken to his best friend since he attacked her on the patrol, choosing midnightstream over his best friend. but it went beyond that, as if it wasn't enough. but he also knew that iguanaspots had no way of knowing what was going on in his head, because he had kept her distant on purpose. it was hornetshade's fault that he was so isolated from everyone he cared about, and it was time to begin making reparations. the afternoon was sunny with a slight chill, a nice-enough day for hunting when hornetshade approached iguanaspots, who glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. "can we talk?" he asked her, blinking when she didn't immediately reject him. "outside of camp would be good, if we could go for a walk." though the truth of erasmus had been exposed, hornetshade still wasn't keen on the clan knowing about his secrets. if anything, iguanaspots rarely passed up on gossip and secrecy, so she followed his lead with a flick of her tail. hornetshade took his time, finding the correct words while they walked into the woods. leaves crunched under their leaves. time passed until, finally, iguanaspots stoppped. "what is this about? we've walked far enough," she said. when hornetshade turned, still unsure, he was surprised when he noticed the slightest hesitation that sparked in her eyes. iguanaspots had always stuck out to him as strong and dependable. she was sturdy and capable, and hornetshade realized that he had shaken her. she was scared of him, and he had let her down. he made her feel vulnerable. he drew in a deep breath. "i need you to know that i'm sorry. gods - i'm so sorry, iguanaspots. i'm sorry that i attacked you," he began. he drew in a deep breath and held it, his locked with iguanaspots. hornetshade's gaze searched hers, and he looked for anger. he looked for distrust, or any signal that she was going to reject him, but he found only the same nervousness that was so starkly unfamiliar. he wished, for just a moment, that she could hate him, as if it might make it easier. "i'm so, so sorry. and i know that i could never make it up to you. you're my best friend, you've always been my best friend, and you've always been so loyal to me. you've had my back since we were just kits, and i betrayed you. i wish that i hadn't, and there's no excuse. i've been a bad friend, and i'm sorry." hornetshade was quiet for a long moment, and iguanaspots turned her face away. in the silence, hornetshade felt fear - fear that she truly would walk away from him, and that the moons of friendship would mean nothing. his chest gripped cold with the fear that he would never have the close comfort that they had shared for so long, when she was a kit, hornetshade only a few moons out of the nursery. there was so much that he hadn't told her before. he had never told her about his past, or about his past with ferretwhisker that made his fur bristle. he never disclosed the secret meetings with otterfur and warblercry, or his knowledge about groveclan and erasmus. he chose midnightstream over iguanaspots, and he hated that he had been forced to make that choice at all. so, when iguanaspots finally turned to him, hornetshade's heart clenched. "i just don't understand why you would do that," iguanaspots finally said, her voice quavering. "not that you would want to save midnightstream, or that you would want to help his clan, but why did you go against me?" she asked. "do you really think so little of me that you think i would hurt midnightstream, knowing all that i know? what if i wanted to help you, so that you wouldn't have to freeze in front of the rest of the clan? what if i was trying to help you out of a position where you would have had to attack him, after everything?" if hornetshade had had any expectation of what iguanaspots might say, these words did not connect. "i don't - i didn't -" "what if privetears or mapleshadow or wolverinesnap saw you refuse to attack on their command? we thought that groveclan was the enemy, and i wanted to help you," iguanaspots said. "did you really think i would've hurt him like that? i know what he means to you. i just never thought that you would have attacked me." "i'm sorry," hornetshade said again, but the words felt heavy and inefficient on his tongue. "of course, now, i know that you wouldn't have. but, i'll admit, i wasn't thinking then. i was nervous. i was scared for him, for you, for our whole patrol. i was scared for all of our clans, because i knew erasmus was guilty." when iguanaspots stared incredulously at him, hornetshade shook his head vigorously. "no, really. i knew the truth, i knew he killed lightkit and was behind twilightkit's death. after juniperstorm came to camp, warblercry went to groveclan to talk to her. and her story made more sense than erasmus' did. so i was scared, i didn't know what would happen. otterfur went to warn badgerstar, but i wanted to warn midnightstream, and i was so scared. highgarden was angry, and i didn't know what erasmus wasn't capable of. i didn't know what groveclan would do if otterfur didn't make it in time, or what they would do even if he did. i was so scared, iguanaspots, and i'm sorry that i let myself be blinded by that. if you could ever find it within yourself to forgive me, one day, i promise that i'll never let you down again. you're my best friend, and i don't want to lose you." as iguanaspots seemed to absorb all of the new information, hornetshade allowed her the silence to think. he watched the trees rustle, the leaves dancing in the gentle breeze, and he knew that colder weather was coming. finally, iguanaspots cleared her throat and looked to hornetshade, her expression unreadable. "i'm sorry for going after midnightstream, i understand that it might have looked poor in the moment, and i never voiced my intentions to you. but please, know that i would never hurt you, or the ones you care about. but you're my best friend, and i need you to know that what you did was really scary for me, too. i was kept in the dark from everything that you had going on, and was working only with the knowledge i had. i thought that groveclan meant to hurt us, and i thought that might have included midnightstream, too," she sighed, but when their eyes met, there was warmth there, familiar and welcome, and hornetshade knew that he had been forgiven and that they would be alright. "you're my best friend, you're like my brother. how about we just agree not to keep secrets from each other anymore? and that includes secret groveclan missions." for the first time in a long time, they shared a laugh, and hornetshade settled down beside iguanaspots, close enough to let his head rest on her shoulder, and she let him. it was the start. "okay, i think that's more than fair." "and, for the record, if you ever attack me again, i will shred your ears for good," she said. "i know," hornetshade said. at that, iguanaspots rested her head against hornetshade's, and he felt the scales tipping back into balance. "would you tell me about what happened? it sounds like you've been through a lot these past few moons." hornetshade considered it, wondering if it was a story worth being told, or if it should be told at all. at last, he decided that, maybe, it would never be told again, but he owed iguanaspots more than he could say, and he had a fair way to go to earn her trust back. so they sat together, watching the sunset turn the air gold with dying sunshine while he told her everything.
spencer's stomach twisted with unease as he stood outside of the den. for the most part, this part of camp was secluded and entirely out of the way. in its original construction, it made sense for the wilteds' den to be out of the way of the usual hustle and bustle of camp, where the wilted wouldn't be disturbed by the comings and goings of patrols during all hours of the days and nights. they were close in reach to defend and for the herbalists to check up on them, but the den had been deserted for a long time until tawnyrose decided that it would be converted to house spencer's mate. outside of the den, stormshroud and seedspring stood watch, posted as erasmus' guards for the next few hours, though spencer could tell that it wasn't a job the knights and roses were particularly happy about. after the first few moons, he could hear their rumblings about how it was a boring and tedious task, particularly when there was prey looking to be caught, borders to mark, and friends to be with. stormshroud sat with his eyes closed, to the point that spencer thought that the white knight might have dozed off, if not for the set of his shoulders and the words he shared with seedspring, who groomed her ears and chest fur. still, when spencer approached, the pair straightened up, and spencer watched the way stormshroud's ears pricked and how seedspring watched him through wide eyes. "good evening," stormshroud said evening, seeming to weigh spencer, and seedspring shot an apprehensive glance back towards the den's entrance. once, moons earlier, spencer had been greeted warmly, with friendly tones by his clanmates. now, apart from merlinsong and adenium, it seemed that spencer had either disappeared from the clan, or was an outsider. and, he supposed, it was more than fair. his shoulders felt increasingly heavy with each step he took, and he couldn't sleep at night. but, there was only one cat in whom spencer might be able to voice his guilt without repercussions. "has tawnyrose cleared you to come here?" seedspring asked, and spencer shook his head, finding no reason to lie. "i didn't realize i needed to make an appointment," spencer said. stormshroud and seedspring shared a quick glance. "well, technically, no," stormshroud said. "but i think this is a different circumstance, don't you agree?" spencer shuffled his paws for a moment before sweeping his tail. "merlinsong wanted me to check him, to make sure that he's healthy. we are allowed to make sure that our prisoner isn't being eaten alive by ticks, i believe." spencer had never felt more bold in his life. stormshroud, however, seemed to hesitate once more, but spencer glanced towards the den when a voice called out through the shadows: "if you must, you're welcome to join us, stormshroud. you can help check between my ears," came erasmus' deep tones. the white knight looked to seedspring, but the rose's eyes were wide. finally, spencer was waved past the guards and into the den. his paws felt like they were floating above the ground, and, once again, he felt a deep unease settle between his bones. he felt cold, and erasmus' eyes didn't offer him any warmth as they flashed through the dim hollow. there was a long, heavy silence, and spencer was acutely aware that stormshroud was likely listening to their conversation, with seedspring ready to signal the rest of the clan at the first sign of trouble, but it wasn't highgarden that spencer was worried about. their judgement had come to pass, and would again if they found out the truth. but spencer was faced with erasmus' towering shadow, which seemed to swell in the lonely den. "i was beginning to think that you would never come visit me," erasmus said, and spencer stood dumbly as he looked at his mate. inside, he was conflicted. erasmus and he had a strange sort of bond, sick and diseased with seasons of rotting secrets. but, had there not been a foundation there, at the very beginning? had they not shared some pure, genuine love? it was hard to remember, and it was precisely why spencer couldn't stay away any longer. some matters needed to be settled. "i was used for a long time, for a long of things. dante used me to patch up all of the cats he bullied and beat," spencer said. "and tawnyrose used me as a chip against you. and you used me for a lot of things." and some things couldn't be said outright, not even if they were alone. perhaps because they would never, truly, be alone. spencer heard lightkit's final moments each time he blinked, and it echoed in his sleep. lightkit would never leave him, nor would the visions of scars and bloodshed that he had witnessed over the moons. "and are you trying to liberate yourself, dear?" erasmus asked, allowing for a pause. when spencer didn't rush to fill it, erasmus sighed heavily and stood, pacing slowly alongside his nest. "do you remember when we first met? i do. when you tried to push me back into my nest so you could heal my wretched claw, wasn't it? and you were a stuttering mess, you know that? you couldn't form a sentence, and here you are now, standing up to me as if i've taken something from you." "a lot's changed since then," spencer replied. "i was a different cat back then." erasmus hummed, nodding his broad head in thorough agreement. "you were an innocent cat back then, is what you mean. back then, you wouldn't have betrayed me like you did. but you're not innocent anymore. i've seen what you can do, and -" "stop," spencer cut him off. his eyes were shut tight and his claws dug into the soft floor of the den. his fur stood on-end and he shivered. erasmus let him recover, watching him with those gleaming yellow eyes that seemed to pierce through spencer's thin fur. "what i did, i did for you. and you've said that you did everything for me. but i - how do i know that that's true?" erasmus' purr had always been a deep, ominous sort of sound. it vibrated through the walls of the den, and spencer felt it rattle his gut. when he purred now, it was amused. "it is the truth, whether you believe me or not. we've depended on each other for a long time now, you know. i've protected you, kept you safe. you've healed me, made sure i didn't get sick. you gave tawnyrose a reason to keep us here, and i was trying to make sure that we stayed on top." "but we would've. even if it hadn't happened, and -" "no," erasmus said, this time cutting into spencer's words. the small herbalist flinched from the force of the argument. "because groveclan would have found out. they would've, you know that. they did find out. and if juniperstorm hadn't talked, then someone else would have. it was only a matter of time, and then we would've been driven out. and i wasn't going to let it slip away like that. i did it so we could stay together. it wasn't for me, i could live anywhere, survive on my own. but you needed me, you've always needed me. i did it for us." the moons apart made spencer realize two things: the first, that erasmus wasn't lying. the second, that erasmus was wrong. even if it was twisted and sick, even if erasmus was sick and wrong, he wasn't lying. he truly believed that it was for the good for them both. previously, erasmus had been hungry for power. perhaps he was when he killed lightkit, too, but there was a different purpose. power, yes, but the power to stay in control and to keep them safe together, where it had only been climbing the ladder previously. but, spencer was stronger than either of them had given him credit for. he would never be a fighter or a hunter, but he was valuable beyond what he could do for erasmus. he turned his face away. "i need time away from you, erasmus. and i think you need time apart from me. i think... i think this will be good for you. i think that it'll give you time to figure out what you want besides power, and i need to figure out who i am and what i'm capable of." the thing was - spencer was bolder. in groveclan, with the pressure of the world weighing down his shoulders, spencer had cracked. he ran from the moment out of fear, but he could feel himself healing. the physical distance from erasmus was helping him put himself back together. even if what they had was love, it wasn't right, and it couldn't be. at least, not now. not like this. it would never be right like this, and spencer knew it, even if erasmus couldn't. spencer hoped that, maybe someday, he could. erasmus didn't speak for a long moment, and spencer wondered if he would. but he did. erasmus turned his back to spencer and sat, his wide shoulders blocking spencer out of the way. "then go, and don't come back. you'd better hope that my jaws don't loosen. pray that something doesn't slip out." the threat sent ice through spencer's veins, and the fear let him know that he was still alive. he could do this, but he still wouldn't sleep at night. he would forever be cursed with shame and guilt. he wondered if erasmus slept soundly at night. "good bye, erasmus. maybe i'll come back someday," spencer said, but erasmus didn't answer. on the way out, spencer caught stormshroud's eye. though the knight still appeared skeptical, he tipped his head as spencer passed. "do you think you could come by the nursery later to check on the kits?" stormshroud asked, and spencer nodded. "i'd be glad to," he answered, returned seedspring's gentle smile. it wasn't the way it was, but it was better, and it would do.
arcticblink's snowy pelt came closer and closer to where hurricanejaw was waiting for his friend. a rabbit hung from the hunter's jaws, which he placed down in front of hurricanejaw, flashing a crooked smile. "looks like i've got you beat again," he said, and hurricanejaw scoffed as he looked between the plump rabbit and the skinny mouse he had managed to catch. "not all of us can run like you can, you're one of the fastest cats in the clan," hurrianejaw said with a flick of his tail. "that's not entirely true," arcticblink countered. "i can barely keep up with kitechaser and tigergaze lately with my old bones. these young cats are too full of energy. in any case, i think you're not even trying anymore. you'll just sit back and let me do the hunting while you wait and catch the first mouse to run under your paws." in the face his arcticblink's usual dramatics, hurricanejaw rolled his eyes and bent his neck to take a bite from the rabbit. "you act as if you're on your deathbed. i'm older than you are, and they aren't any faster than you." after swallowing another bite and pushing the rabbit to arcticblink, he grinned. "but our meals do taste so much better when you catch them and i've been able to take a nap, it's much better than having to run after prey all day when you'll do it for me." at that, arcticblink scoffed. "right, and i'm talking like i'm old, you elder." their tones were light and amused as they ate. above them, the sunlight trickled between the gaps in the leaves over their heads. it was a warm day, and much of the clan had been dozing in the cool shade when they left. there were plenty of hunting patrols out, enjoying the easy prey and bright sunshine. after a period of companionable silence as they ate, arcticblink sat back on his haunches and cleaned his whiskers. "speaking of, how's your grandkit doing? he is quite cute - is cougarstrike handling fatherhood well?" "he's very well, healthy and already all curiosity," hurricanejaw said with a smile. "and cougarstrike is doing well, i think, now that he's sure no one thinks any less of his for falling for a bearclan queen. he seems it be handling it better than i did, and he's younger than i was," hurricanejaw said with a purr. "the whole clan is smitten with polarkit, the roots keep saying he's very well behaved. no one in highgarden should have any right to judge where one finds love," arcticblink said with an encouraging smile. "you were a good father, i don't think any of your kits would begin to even question that. you've used the time you've been able to, and you've treated them all well. raccoonslip is your spitting image, wolfhowl looks up to you like a hero, foxspark only ever wants to impress you," he said. "cougarstrike seems like he wants to be you." bashful, hurricanejaw flicked his tail. "i should've been there for them from the start, you know? i can never stop thinking about when i found them at the old tower. they were so scared and so worried. maybe if i had been with them, i wouldn't have been like that. i could've been their father right from the start, maybe." arcticblink blinked sympathetically, and hurricanejaw shrugged. "but i know, i know. things might have been a lot different if that had been the case. maybe maplelily and i never would have had them at all. maybe newtmask would hate me, maybe waveclan never would have disbanded, or something else might have happened that would've separated us." he paused and stretched out a paw, which arcticblink watched. "never i never would've met you, after all." "and what a shame that would've been." "you would've been eating alone," hurricanejaw pointed out, but arcticblink sighed blissfully. "i would've had the whole rabbit to myself." the pair laughed together, their voices light and airy, their stomachs full. finally, as the sun warmed their fur, arcticblink leaned companionably against hurricanejaw's broader shoulder. "i know that the paths aren't always smooth and gentle, but i'm glad that we're here, like this. it's a beautiful day, and we're in good company." "surely you have regrets from a different life," hurricanejaw said after a moment's consideration. "even my best dreams, lounging in the sun with the knowledge that my kits are safe with kits of their own, are blotted with regrets." arcticblink nodded once, struck solemn. "my dreams are riddled with regrets. i have lots i wish for, and much that i wish had played out differently." he let out a low, breathy sigh. "i miss my kits, and i dream of when they were taken from me. i wish i could have held them closer to my belly and that the twolegs hadn't torn us apart. i wish that my mate hadn't been gripped that one freezing night, and i hope that we'll all be free from hardships someday, but this is how it is." he smiled then, sad and wistful. "but i accepted a long time ago that i can't change the past. i can't change the present or the future either, but i can do the best i can to set my paws on the right road to make it better. i can choose what i do, and i choose what i want." the glance that passed between them was deep with unspoken understanding, and there was a tenderness when hurricanejaw nuzzled arcticblink's cheek. "we can choose, and we can shape the future... so that maybe it can be our future. what do you think?" the sun cast down though the trees, lighting arcticblink's cool eyes when he gazed at hurricanejaw. "i'd like that a lot, i really, really would," he said, letting hurricanejaw's rumbling purr roll through his pelt.
"are you nervous?" seedspring's voice was clear in marigoldpaw's ears, though he felt as though he was miles and miles away. as he looked up towards the sky, where the sun peaked above the distant mountains that surrounded highgarden's green valley, he could nearly hear the distant sounds of chessclan's howling winds from his first assessment, which he had never returned from. when he didn't answer right away, seedspring settled at his side, hesitating for a moment before touching her nose to his shoulder. "you shouldn't be. if you are, you don't have any reason to be nervous, i hope you know that. hurricanejaw was really happy with your assessment, i heard him talking about it with charredbreeze and sagecloud. he was impressed." after another moment, marigoldpaw felt the world snap back into place, and he finally tuned his face to seedspring. "thank you," he said, though her soft blink told him that she didn't know what for. but marigoldpaw decided that it didn't matter. his muscles felt heavy, but in a good way. "it was harder than i first thought," he admitted, though he was grateful that it wasn't as intensive as chessclan's assessment had been. only moons earlier, he had been working to travel through the dangerous mountain passes. it wasn't uncommon for the young cats to go missing during their assessments, and it had frightened marigoldpaw to death during his time. it had been a long way from home, and each step had been uncertain. back then, he had been worried that he wouldn't make it back to chessclan. he never did. seedspring grinned. "hurricanejaw's not easy. you should be proud of yourself." "he's a good mentor, he knows a lot. it makes me wish i could've been here earlier, you know? there's so much i could've learned from him, if i had the chance," marigoldpaw said, only half-surprised when a familiar voice came from behind him. "you don't need to be a thorn to learn," hurricanejaw said, and marigoldpaw dipped his head politely at the senior knight. he purred gently as he looked between the pair of young cats. "i'd like to think that we're all always learning, even after we've gotten our full names, and well beyond that, too. just today arcticblink was showing me a better way to stalk mice. it's the cats who think they know everything who know the least. this is only the beginning for you, and i hope that we can all continue to teach each other for a long time, what do you say?" seedspring and marigoldpaw exchanged a bright look before marigoldpaw dipped his head once more. "i'd be really grateful for that, hurricanejaw. thank you." hurricanejaw's smile was warm, and he let out a pleasant rumble before touching his nose to marigoldpaw's ear. "good, i'm excited to see what else you're capable of here. highgarden is lucky to have you." with that, hurricanejaw turned to sit with his family, and marigoldpaw smiled after him for a moment, watching as the clan began to gather around them. hurricanejaw settled between maplelily and arcticblink, and it was another moment been smokemane and obsidianwing went to sit with them. elkpaw and beechpaw raced into the middle of the clearing, calling out excitedly to marigoldpaw, followed more slowly by quillpaw, hawthornpaw, and bramblepaw. though marigoldpaw had only been in highgarden for a short time, the faces were immediately familiar to him, as an extension of himself, and when he turned seedspring, he could see the brilliant shine in her eyes that he had already come to admire. "i'm not nervous," he finally said. "just hoping that i'll get the words right and that tawnyrose'll have a good name for me." seedspring rolled her eyes. "stagscorch was worried too. he wanted an exceptionally good name and was dropping hints for moons for all of his good ideas. and tawnyrose gave him a better name than any of his suggestions. your name is nothing to worry about, and you'll be great, i know it." within a few moments, the queen emerged from her den and didn't pause before she reached her perch to look down upon the rest of highgarden. her gaze swept across the gathered clan before she flashed a smile and greeted her clan: "what an eventful moon we had, isn't it? though merlinsong has already warned me that greenleaf won't last forever, and we must stay prepared, now as forever, for the upcoming dangers and hardships of fall and winter. may the gods look down upon us and grant us well these upcoming seasons for a mild winter and little frost," she said, as many of the senior knights and roses grumbled their agreements. "but, it is with the strength of the clan in mind that we continue to pass down wisdom and train our thorns, so that we will be well-prepared for anything that may come our way. and marigoldpaw came to us when he was in need, so that he may help us, and it is time that he joins our ranks as a full knight." several encouraging sounds went up from the crowd when tawnyrose padded forward, and marigoldpaw, momentarily, felt rooted to the spot. with a laugh, seedspring nudged his shoulder, and he met tawnyrose halfway. "marigoldpaw, do you swear to serve highgarden as a knight until you are no longer able, loyal to the clan above all else, even if it means giving up your own life? do you pledge yourself under the light of the seven gods: the mother, the maiden, the father, the warrior, the smith, the crone, and the stranger?" tawnyrose asked, and marigoldpaw was relieved when his voice was strong and steady when he answered: "i swear it." "then, from this moment forward, you will be known as marigoldflick, for the brightness of your pelt and spirit as well as your agility and adaptability. highgarden is blessed to welcome you as a full member of our clan," tawnyrose said to marigoldflick, who met her bright green eyes as he took in his new name. his first thought was that seedspring was right, he had nothing to worry about. "welcome to highgarden, marigoldflick," tawnyrose said to marigoldflick while the clan erupted into cheers for the new knight. after thanking tawnyrose, marigoldflick turned to meet his clan, and was momentarily stunned by the broad smiles. it was true that chessclan was so far away, but he was glad to finally be home. as seedspring cheered his name and several of the thorns gathered around to congratulate him, marigoldflick allowed himself to be swept up in the moment.
it took otterfur some time before he felt that he could breathe easily once more. old habits, it seemed, did not die so easily after all, and he found himself glancing over his shoulder again and again, searching for any hints of erasmus' large yellow eyes, or of viperstar's glowering sneer that struck such a deep fear in otterfur's chest. the pain that highgarden felt was amplified in his chest, with the memory of lightkit's small body, with the cries and suffering of her twin brothers, and of all that came after. it was a miracle, after all, that otterfur managed to make it to badgerstar in time with a warning. it was nothing short of pure luck that ensured everyone's safety, blessed by the stars and the gods that neither clan suffered casualties from the fighting, and that highgarden managed to subdue erasmus. it was the best he might have wished for under such difficult circumstances, compounded with the knowledge that he was seen as nothing less that admirable for working against erasmus. it seemed that his secret discussions with hornetshade and warblercry would forever remain just as that, with no more than a few long, knowing glances exchanged between the trio. no one would ever have to know of warblercry's meeting in groveclan, for example, and hurricanejaw seemed content to let otterfur's slip from the battle patrol be forgotten. still, despite it all, otterfur knew that he wasn't yet done. erasmus lingered still, out of sight but at the forefront of the clan's consciousness, as if taunted endlessly by the sharp claws and quick wits that tricked nearly the entire clan and came so close to instigating a bloody war between close allies. otterfur had restless nights without sleep, dreaming of a bear's thunderous roars and viperstar's claws streaked with blood. when he did sleep, he no longer dreamt of wasppaw's death, but of his lost sons. his sons - his sons he loved so dearly, who he had only ever wanted to love and keep safe, despite the many times that he continued to disrespect and disappoint them. if nothing else, otterfur hoped that, maybe, his recent actions would be a start for reconciliation, if only he knew where they might have gone. he thought about it endlessly, drifting off during patrols and only half-listening to his clanmates speaking about hunting patrols and old adventures from their youth. it was during one such story, when charredbreeze told about the time she chased a rabbit into a vast tunnel system and came out on the other side, that otterfur sought the only remaining link he had to his former clan. since direfang arrived in highgarden moons earlier, otterfur rarely felt that he wasn't being watched. he knew that firefang was biding his time and waiting for his chance to see otterfur make a mistake. and yet, otterfur couldn't bring himself to fault direfang. the silver knight had lost so much, as well, and otterfur was sure that his motives and loyalty was with highgarden just as much revenge for rosemist. highgarden wouldn't fall to the same evils that plagued bearclan. otterfur, finally, felt as though he had come up for air. as the days passed, shifting into colder weather, he felt invigorated. the pain of recent losses and truth would never not sting, but the clan was recovering. and otterfur felt, for the first time in many seasons, that he was healing. "do you have a moment?" he asked direfang one evening, after many of their clanmates had retired for the night. outside of the nursery, cougarstrike was ushering polarkit towards the roots, who would care for him during the night. kitechaser and riverfoam met wolverinesnap and mapleshadow by the camp's entrance, preparing for the moonhigh patrol, and softglow spoke with bluetcrest, their heads bowed as they spoke, likely working out patrols for the next day. it was a quiet night with a cold breeze, but otterfur met direfang's sharp eyes when he turned his head. "of course, otterfur," direfang said, though his tail twitched, as if flicking away a bug. "what can i do for you?" otterfur looked at the other tom, searching his face. there was distaste there, and otterfur knew that they would never be friends, but he hoped that, if nothing else, he could end the shadow of guilt that hung over his head. "i want you to know that i didn't join in with the battle patrols when we attacked groveclan. i left the patrol and went to warn badgerstar anout what was coming. i told him everything, the entire plan." perhaps direfang had been expecting some plea for relief or forgiveness, and he narrowed his eyes slightly, thinking, as otterfur continued: "i sold us out, i guess. i betrayed the clan. i figured you might want to know, in case you wanted to tell tawnyrose about my past." direfang seemed to weigh this new information, taking his time to consider it before flicking his tail again. "why?" "you said you would tell the clan who i am, if i betrayed them. and i did, and i don't regret my actions. why hide it?" but direfang shook his head. "no - why tell me that? why tell me?" he blinked. "do you want to be exiled?" otterfur dipped his head, hiding a wistful smile. "no," he answered earnestly. "no, i really don't want to be exiled. i think this is my home, or as close to a real home as i've ever had. i'd like to spend the rest of my days here, with these cats. and that's why i did what i did, and that's why i told you." he looked at direfang, feeling that, at long last, they were equals and on the same footing. "i'm truly sorry about everything that has happened. i grieve for rosemist, i am immensely guilty that i can't be with my sons right now, and i am haunted every day by what happened with viperstar. i'm sick that i ever let any of that happen, but... viperstar had also been my friend, once, and i thought he had the best intentions. i was blind, and i stood by for a long time. so i saw what erasmus was doing, he would've had us tear one another apart, all for whatever reasons he believed he had. but i couldn't stand by, not again." the words felt choked in his throat and his breath rattled. he dropped his head. "if that makes me a traitor, then i would volunteer myself for exile. but i can't live with the fear anymore. i won't be forced to hide in my own nest out of fear that you'll come down on my throat. i won't do it anymore, wolfthorn, i can't." direfang's old name between them seemed to spark something, and wolfthorn stood to meet otterfur. "i don't think i could ever forgive you for everything that you've done. your paws are stained, and i can't forget that," direfang said slowly. "but i don't think it's my place to bear the grudge anymore. i'd like to try to forget, and the gods will judge you. i will not." they shared a brief, fleeting smile as direfang swept his tail closer to himself. the breeze turned frigid in the night air, but otterfur didn't mind the biting sting. "thank you," otterfur said. when direfang dipped his head and made to turn away into the knights' den, otterfur cleared his throat quietly. "i'm glad that you're here, you know. you're the type of knight that i think highgarden needs." though direfang didn't respond, he paused mid-step, and otterfur hoped that he was smiling.
"don't push him too hard," bluetcrest had heard merlinsong warn tawnyrose and the rest of the border patrol before they set off. though he knew that the sentiment was meant to be for his own good, to keep his freshly-healed scars from becoming too tight, or worse, bluetcrest couldn't shake the feeling that he had to prove himself. it was hardly a great feat - he had been on countless border patrols over the moons. he knew highgarden's territory better than almost any other cat, and he had traveled every inch over and over again. it was his home, but a new danger lurked behind each corner. in bluetcrest's mind, as he kept in step beside tawnyrose, he felt that every shadow held a new threat, and he could have sworn that he saw the glint of claws out of the corner of his eye. as mapleshadow and tawnyrose chatted about the rose's recent luck catching fish in a nearby stream, bluetcrest felt as though he was a million miles away. before they departed, pythoneyes had come to wish him well, and there was no mistaking the tell-tale concern in the other tom's sharp eyes. he was worried about bluetcrest, and bluetcrest felt his throat tighten at the very thought that something bad might happen - he worried that something might keep him from returning to pythoneyes. he had almost been lost once, and it couldn't happen again. "- we take the shortcut to circle back around towards the mother's grounds?" iguanaspots voice broke through bluetcrest's thoughts as the young rose came up close by his ear. he blinked, taking in how far they had walked in what felt as if only a brief moment. on his other side, he could feel tawnyrose's eyes staring at him, but he pointedly avoided her glance as the patrol waited for the queen to answer iguanaspots. she hummed thoughtfully at last, directing her attention to the clear sky overhead. "i suppose there's no need to mark the western border too closely. the celestials' border has been quiet lately, and i'm sure it was marked this morning. i'm sure there's nothing to miss." before he could stop himself, bluetcrest missed a step and piped up: "but what if something else might have passed through?" he blurted, finding his own surprise mirrored in tawnyrose's green gaze. "there could have been a rogue or a badger, or something else that could be a threat," he added, looking to recover, but it was clear that tawnyrose was uncertain of his reaction. before she could answer, however, mapleshadow stepped forward. "i'm with bluetcrest, we can't be too careful," she said, catching the attendant's eye with a kind smile that bordered too closely on placating. bluetcrest felt his fur begin to prickle uneasily. "and it's a beautiful day out. i don't think we'll be getting too many more of these for a while, so it might be better to be thorough while the weather's still nice and we can grant ourselves a cheat when it's bitter cold." though iguanaspots and seedspring murmured their complaints of sore muscles and heavy eyes, tawnyrose sided with mapleshadow and the patrol continued along their path. the patrol proceeded with a fragile quiet, and bluetcrest lost himself in his own thoughts. he wondered if the trees had always held such dark shadows behind their trunks, and he felt himself turn to face every slight rustle of the leaves. it was only when mapleshadow's voice sounded near his ear that bluetcrest turned his face the rose, who eyed him cautiously. instinctively, bluetcrest looked for tawnyrose, but mapleshadow sniffed and gestured several lengths away, where the queen was nearing the border with seedspring. "it's alright to be nervous, if you are," she said. once, bluetcrest had admired mapleshadow's ability to get right to the point. she was perceptive and blunt, sometimes to the point of nearly offending her clanmates, but bluetcrest saw that she always meant well, even in the worst instances. she cared, and it made bluetcrest's ears feel suddenly warm with embarrassment. "the forest can be a terrifying place, even in the best of times. you never know what could happen, and its why we have to be vigilant with every patrol." she cast bluetcrest a knowing look. "and i know that it can be even more overwhelming when merlinsong has had you on rest for some moons." "i do hope that you don't mean to say that i'm out of practice, because that's not true. and i'm not scared, this is our home." mapleshadow merely swished her tail, turning her head away from bluetcrest. "camp is our home. we're just surrounded by the rest of it, and we need to make sure that it stays safe so we can keep our home. that's the way it works," she said before softening, shrugging her shoulders. "i've been hurt before, and it's scary to come back, knowing that you've been in pain, and that you could be in more pain again if you're out here. but we're all glad to see you on your feet, and tawnyrose missed you while you were recovering. it's not that you're out of practice, but you need to remember why we're out here, and how to carry on. and you will." at that, the patrol started to move on, and bluetcrest stood for a moment, watching as the patrol moved. seedspring was the youngest member of the patrol, and she carried herself just as well as mapleshadow, watching the treeline for any suspicious movement. at the same time, iguanaspots and warblercry continued to chatter, seemingly unaware of the importance of their duties. they were good roses, but complacency had been the reason erasmus broke through, and complacency was the reason nothing had been done sooner to avoid the deep scars that were still healing. among them all, tawnyrose sniffed the air carefully, but it was clear that her attention was split and that her thoughts were occupied. even the queen, bluetcrest recognized, wasn't entirely there, and he hoped that nothing would befall their patrol while they were all thinking of something halfway across the territory. it was dangerous, and he would need to keep his senses sharper to avoid any more scars. later, when he spoke to pythoneyes and was asked about how his first patrol back went, bluetcrest knew that he would have to smile and convince his friend that he was better, that he wasn't scared with every snap of a twig. but he was terrified, just as he hadn't wanted to admit to mapleshadow. though merlinsong had treated the scars on his skin, bluetcrest wore deep wounds on the inside that scared him.
the night was cool but calm, and betonypetal sat alone in the middle of camp, listening to the low snores from the dens and a distant hoot of an owl. a long time ago, when she was still a kit, betonypetal's mother taught her how to memorize the familiar shapes and patterns in the stars. she looked to the stars for a sense of comfort and recognition in the dark night, but found that the sky was empty, a sight unlike any other betonypetal had ever come across before. foreboding washed over her, filling her belly with sick dread when she realized that the shadows of the night were growing longer, taking her further and further away from her clanmates' snoring. when she tried to call out for someone, anyone, she had no voice. she couldn't scream, she knew that there was no one to hear her. and then she couldn't breathe. as in other dreams, she heard the low rumblings of roar, and she imagined a mighty lion of legend, though her heart told her that it was no such beast. slowly, over an eternity, the roaring grew to a crescendo, echoing in her ears, but she woke with a gasp before she could see the threat. though the dreams in her dreams shook with effort, as if trying to hold back and cage the sound, it was to no avail. her eyes took in the deep gloom of the nursery, as her friends slept around her. in the next nest over, ferretwhisker's breathing was slow and deep as she dreamed, her tail curled protectively over her growing stomach, and smallheart and swiftheart shared a nest on ferretwhisker's other side. across the nursery, betonypetal could barely make out stormshroud and flickersky who shared a large nest with their kits. tornadokit's paws stirred as if she was running through a dream, and hurricanekit slept on his back, nearly lost in the bulk of his father's long white fur. the near-pitch darkness was a comfort in the warmth that the nursery's thick walls held, and betonypetal wished that she found her sleep as restful as her clanmates. it was only when she turned her head slightly that she realized clovershine was sitting up, his eyes wide. "hey," betonypetal whispered quietly. "i'm sorry, did i wake you?" "it seemed like you were having a bad dream," clovershine murmured. "ayalla told me that she was worried you weren't sleeping. does this happen often?" betonypetal flinched, unsure of what she might say. the truth was that she had been having more bad dreams, with the nightmares growing worse with each passing night, each filling her with more terror in the recurring roar of the unknown. sensing her hesitation, clovershine nuzzled her cheek tenderly. "please - don't keep any secrets. let me bare this with you." betonypetal drew in a shuttering breath. "i wake up and i'm outside, and there's something coming towards camp," she explained quietly, mindful of their denmates and sleeping kits. "i don't know what it is but it... it feels hungry, like it wants to eat us all up." "like a fox or a badger?" clovershine asked, but betonypetal shook her head. "it - it doesn't feel alive. but it wants to swallow us whole, and it feels like it's large and powerful enough to do whatever it wants. and i feel worried, i'm scared that it'll get whatever it wants. i just know that it's going to win, and i never know what'll happen to us when it gets to the camp. it makes me feel so paralyzed, because i know there's nothing we can do to stop it." for a long moment, clovershine and betonypetal shared a long look through the gloom, but he pulled her closer to his flank and buried his nose in the fur between her ears. "if there was something to worry about, surely the gods would have sent us a sign. tawnyrose and merlinsong - they would have known already. you're not going to feel well unless you get some sleep, it was just a dream." betonypetal hesitated, and clovershine swallowed around the lump in his throat. his mate looked so scared and small, and there was nothing he could do to help her. "you'll feel better in the morning," he whispered to her. "you'll feel better when the sun's up and you've gotten some rest, we can talk to merlinsong about it soon." though betonypetal found sleep again, she didn't find rest. she was haunted by the loud noise and the dark shadows. in her dreams, she trembled.
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eagle
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Post by eagle on Nov 10, 2020 21:44:58 GMT -8
the morning was long and gray when exhaustion pulled at swiftheart's eyes, threatening to close them after a long night, but smallheart's rumbling purr sounded in her ears. tiredly, she wrapped her tail protectively around her newborn kits as merlinsong backed away with a broad smile. "they're all healthy, swiftheart. you have two healthy daughters and one son." the words sounded almost as if through a dream, but swiftheart smiled widely and tipped her head back to look and smallheart. "did you hear that?" "i did," he rumbled happily, hooking his chin over her shoulder to look down at their kits. "they all look so much like you. they're beautiful. they're perfect and ours. we're all a family now." despite herself, swiftheart laughed, mustering the strength to laugh with her whole chest. the movement earned a few quiet mewls from the kits, but swiftheart merely pulled them closer to her stomach. "actually, the twins look much more like you, they have your markings, dear," she commented with another breezy laugh. truly, the pair of mackerel tabbies looked much more like her mate, with the same color fur and distinct tabby stripes. "but she does look like me," swiftheart added absently, daring to dip her head to lick gently at the classic tabby's head. though the nursery, for the most part, had been cleared out to give swiftheart some privacy, ferretwhisker and betonypetal remained in their nests, and betonypetal crossed over to grin at swiftheart. "they really are so beautiful," she said, and ferretwhisker joined them. "did you two think of any names?" ferretwhisker asked, and swiftheart shared a look with smallheart. "when we were trying to think of some, nothing sounded right, not without seeing them," swiftheart said while smallheart hummed his agreement. "we really considered amberkit for a little while, since we met in amberclan and all, but..." he trailed off as he and swiftheart shared another glance before shaking their heads. "no, it doesn't seem to fit them." "they're just all so small," betonypetal purred. "if only smallkit was an option, it would fit them perfectly, they're so sweet." she shared a laugh, but swiftheart's ears pricked and she looked between her kits before nudging smallheart gently. "not smallkit, but what do you think of sweetkit?" she asked. she touched her tail to the single tom's head, watching as he nestled closer to the warmth of her fur with a small whimper. in his movements, he bumped into his twin sister, and she let out a loud, indignant noise, and merlinsong's ear twitched. "she's got a strong pair of lungs on her already. maybe she'll give some of our hunters a good run when she's a thorn, nothing'll be able to outpace her when she's already got so much breath," he said jokingly, but his pale eyes watched over the trio of small kits. "sweetkit is a great name," smallheart said before nudging the little molly to try and soothe her. "how about sparrowkit? if she's got strong lungs, it might be fitting to name her after a songbird." for the final kit, they spent several more minutes suggesting names before swiftheart looked to her daughter, who looked so much like herself with the same spiral tabby markings. from the way her little kit was curled up, the spiral on her side looked as though it eclipsed her pelt, and swiftheart felt the ache of the long night that she had just endured. "i like the name solsticekit," she said softly, and smallheart purred, nuzzling her cheek gently. "i think that's a great name. all of them are perfect. sweetkit, solsticekit, and sparrowkit, welcome to highgarden," smallheart said, and swiftheart felt the lull of sleep pulling at her, and she began to give in. she was so tired, and she would need to keep up her strength. she thought of every moment that had passed since she and smallheart left amberclan, and all that would come. she would see her kits grow up to be strong and independent - but that wouldn't be for many, many seasons. for now, they were so small, and swiftheart knew that she would do anything to keep them safe. but, for now, she slept soundly and dreamed of running across the rolling hills with her mate and kits at her side.
"at bearclan again today?" hurricanejaw asked as otterfur padded over to the small group of senior knights and roses who sat to eat their evening meal. otterfur grinned widely and nodded his head, unable to hide his joy at going to see his kits and grandkits once again. though he tried to make sure that he handled all of his usual responsibilities, he knew that bluetcrest had been putting him on fewer patrols and putting him on patrols closer to the bearclan border. even a moon earlier, otterfur never would have thought he could have had a relationship with sparkstorm and burrwhisker, but they had forgiven him. against all odds, they forgave him, and otterfur wanted to step up and be a father. he needed to be in their lives. even a moon earlier, he thought that the entirety of bearclan had been eradicated and that viperstar had his final wish of seeing the clan fall. instead, the clan seemed to be flourishing in their new home, and otterfur thought that it was either pure luck or fortune that brought him and his sons together again. so, with a brilliant smile at hurricanejaw and a nod at direfang, who reciprocated the polite gesture, he sat down between hurricanejaw and sagecloud. "'course, i had to pass through to say hello to spiderkit and moorkit again. plus, ferretwhisker wanted me to deliver a message to nightfur." "i have a feeling you probably volunteered and that ferretwhisker didn't have to twist your paw to go out of your way," sagecloud teased, letting out a laugh when otterfur didn't argue. instead, she pushed the remainder of a hare in his direction, and he dipped his head to take a bite. "it is nice that we're starting to get along with the bordering clans these days, now. shame that the shadowed kingdom isn't around anymore, so we can't be near them, especially since stormshroud is a lot more fun than any of us would've given him credit for -" she said, earning a round of laughter from the group. "but ferretwhisker seems very happy, and it'll be good that nightfur'll be close for when the kits come." "how's cougarstrike and polarkit?" charredbreeze asked hurricanejaw, who smiled. "ah, of course. it does slip my mind how connected we all seem to be to bearclan these days, almost like it's becoming fashionable," he said with an amused flick of his tail. "i don't want to pry too much into cougarstrike's life like that, he's always been so independent, but i don't think he and nettlemist will be together any longer. it seems like it was just a bit of fleeting young love, but cougarstrike might try to visit the other kits when he can, it'd also be good for polarkit to see his littermates in the future." sagecloud let out a snort of laughter, and she shared an amused glance with maplelily, who had been grooming her long fur. "sounds complicated. does the drama come from your side of the family tree, hurricanejaw?" hurricanejaw rolled his eyes while the rest of the group laughed, and maplelily nodded vigorously. "trust me," maplelily said. "when hurricanejaw was in his prime, he was always trouble. still is, as you all know, but cougarsrike is his spitting image when it comes to that." "yeah, yeah, alright. talk about complicated and romance, sagecloud. how's brindlepelt doing in strikersclan?" the comment earned hurricanejaw a playful swat from his friend. "she's good, just busy," sagecloud said with a half-smile. "i asked her if she minded that i had scars or not, and she thankfully didn't run for the hills when she saw me." though her tone held her usually unaffected tone, it was clear that sagecloud left many of her feelings unsaid. otterfur leaned his head companionably against sagecloud's shoulder, and maplelily stretched out a paw in her direction. "i'm alright. i realized a long time ago that, if she ever wanted to leave, it'd be because of my personlity and not because of a scar, but i was still nervous, you know?" after letting out a half-hearted cough, she nodded in hurricanejaw's direction again. "update us on your current affairs. arcticblink has been rather smiley lately, very unlike him." "it's still new," hurricanejaw said, ducking his head bashfully. "and i don't want to label anything and -" "why wouldn't you?" maplelily asked, her eyes wide as she looked at hurricanejaw. "we've all seen it. you're taken with him and you can't let him go." hurricanejaw appeared genuinely surprised by her words, and he paused, blinking at her for a long moment. though otterfur would never understand the exact depth of their relationship and past, it seemed that they had settled any hard feelings between them moons earlier, and hurricanejaw couldn't keep his smile off of his face, pleased by maplelily's acceptance of his feelings for arcticblink. "i won't," hurricanejaw said. "i'm not letting him go." maplelily smiled and dipped her head. "good, it'd be a shame and you'd be a fool." "more than he already is," sagecloud added before nudging otterfur. "go on, otterfur, we've been cutting you off. you've got to tell us all about the kits. are they the most adorable kits in the world." otterfur took a moment, glancing around at his clanmates... his friends. once, he thought that he knew what it was like to have friends. he thought viperstar was his true friend and that they would always look out for one another. but it was only many moons later, after he had nearly lost everything for viperstar, that otterfur realized how much he had missed out on. this was what it meant to have a friend. he had his sons, and his friends, and his thoughts wandered towards the clan's borders as he began to tell his friends about sparkstorm's kits. finally, he felt that he was rightfully home.
"tornadokit!" flickersky shouted after her kit, watching as she kicked up dust and effectively ruined the hard work that flickersky had put into grooming her fur. she turned her head to where stormshroud was standing at her shoulder, a smile on his muzzle. "you encourage them to act this way when you smile like that," she said to her mate, but stormshroud only smiled wider. "that doesn't mean you have to look so happy about it, you know. they get this from you, you're the troublemaker." "sure," stormshroud said, stifling a laugh. "if that's what you want to tell yourself. as if mapleshadow doesn't have so many stories about all of the headaches you've given her." flickersky rolled her eyes. "mapleshadow isn't my mother, thank the gods." she glanced back towards the nursery, where the rest of their kits were preparing for the ceremony ahead of them. "c'mon, the rest of you. tornadokit already decided that she might as well start the ceremony herself, if she had it her way. but hurricanekit, if i even see you start to run, you'll lose your tail. you have your father's fur, and your father's clumsiness. you'll wind up falling into the mud, and then where would we be?" hurricanekit exchanged an amused glance with his father just as betonypetal poked her head out of the nursery. "oh flickersky, when did you suddenly become so strict?" she teased, smiling when flickersky scoffed. "ever since it appeared that the entire clan was turning on me and i realized that my kits were about to set the forest on fire, at this rate." betonypetal let out a laugh, which only came out louder when hurricanekit shrugged and looked at cirruskit. "doesn't sound like such a bad idea, what do you think?" cirruskit said to his brother. he nudged flickersky. "go ahead mom, what other ideas do you have?" tsunamikit and quakekit laughed when flickersky groaned and began nudging her forward, out of the nursery to make room for betonypetal and ferretwhisker. stormshroud purred and licked quakekit's ear. "your mother is proud of you, and she knows that you're all so talented, she wants the best for you all," he said, following their gazes to where flickersky cuffed hurricanekit's ears. not too far away, tornadokit sat talking to hollandkit, a burr stuck to her flank and swishing her tail against the ground. "she says you're all like me when you're driving her up the walls, but i can promise you that there's a lot more of her in all of you than she'd like to admit to your faces. but you all make her so happy, and we couldn't be more proud. we know that you're all going to do well in your training." tsunamikit puffed out her chest. "we know, dad. we have two of the most talented parents there are -" behind them, clovershine huffed. "we'll show them soon enough," he said to betonypetal before stormshroud turned to glare at his friend. they exchanged a knowing smile before stormshroud grinned at his daughters. "i have a feeling that you're all even more talented than us. my hope is that you'll go on to do even greater things. we'll miss having you all in the nursery, but this training is important. i know i don't need to tell you two about that," he said, shrugging one shoulder casually. "but your mentors are going to be amazing, no matter who they are. and they'll have a lot to pass on to you. listen well and listen carefully. make me proud." "yes dad," quakekit said before they followed along as the knights and roses began to gather together, waiting for tawnyrose to emerge from her den with her court. softglow and bluetcrest sat underneath tawnyrose's perch while the rest of the clan began to fill the clearing, their excited chatter quieting only when tawnyrose took her place above the rest and raised her tail to command her clan's attention. the bright sunshine made tawnyrose's eyes gleam a vibrant green, and quakekit tipped her head to look at her father, who smiled reassuringly down at her. nearby, flickersky had managed to sweep the other kits together, smoothing the fur on top on hurricanekit's head with another swipe of her tongue. cirruskit and tsunamikit were seated on either side of their mother, and tornadokit and hollandkit pushed against quakekit's shoulder, settling in. "highgarden, good afternoon," tawnyrose began when the final voices had died down. she smiled admiringly down at her clanmates and her gaze swept the clearing until she found flickersky and stormshroud's kits at the front of the crowd. "let me tell you all a story that i'm sure many of you have heard before. its the story of highgarden from many moons ago, when our clan was only a few. though it's hard to believe as we look around our clan now, feeling the constant presence of our clanmates and knowing that our clan is growing larger every day, we cannot forget that there was a time when it was only myself and bluetcrest." indeed, as quakekit turned her head to look from her parents and littermates to the rest of the clan, it was impossible for her to understand how large the clearing must have seemed in highgarden's first moons as a clan. she couldn't imagine highgarden without merlinsong, softglow, tigergaze, maplelily, or so many of her clanmates. as if she could read quakekit's thoughts, tawnyrose nodded her head and smiled wistfully. "so much has changed since then, and i am so pleased to look at how far our clan has grown, as each cat is a crucial member, from the smallest newborn kit, to the oldest elder or most recent newcomer. but those first moons were essential to setting down the roots of the clan and deciding what our future will hold. and it's for that reason that i am pleased to watch as flickersky, highgarden's first rose, presents her kits before our clan and the gods to begin their training as roots." the knights and roses murmured excitedly, and quakekit watched as mapleshadow leaned forward to nudge flickersky's shoulder affectionately, which her mother returned before ducking her head bashfully. when the clan had settled again, tawnyrose waved the kits forward. without hesitating, tornadokit shot forward to take her place before the clan, quakekit joining her littermates and feeling as their pelts prickled with anticipation. "today we welcome these kits to begin their training to become noble knights and roses of highgarden. from this moment forward until they have completed their training and are given their full names, they will be known as hurricanepaw, tsunamipaw, tornadopaw, quakepaw, and cirruspaw." when tawnyrose finished speaking, their clanmates began to cheer their names, and quakepaw saw her own excitement and joy reflected in her littermates' eyes. "hurricanepaw," tawnyrose began again when the cheering had quieted. "your mentor will be bassflow. he was a great mentor to cougarstrike, and i trust that you'll learn a lot under his watch." though he seemed surprised by the appointment, bassflow greeted his thorn warmly and led the little white tom aside to join the rest of the clan before tawnyrose turned to the rest of the newly-made thorns. "since they arrived in highgaden several moons ago, leopardsun and daystrike have been valued members of the clan. cirruspaw, your mentor will be leopardsun, and daystrike will mentor tornadopaw." the pair of close friends met their thorns, and tornadopaw seemed to take an immediate liking to daystrike, grinning broadly while the stoic oriental tom touched his nose to hers. "jaytalon, you will mentor tsunamipaw," tawyrose continued, and quakepaw waited alone when her sister bounded over to her mentor's side, her tail fluffed out from excitement. anticaption made quakepaw dig her claws into the soft ground, eager to find out who would be training her to be a rose. her eyes scanned the many faces of the knights until, at last, tawnyrose nodded to the crowd. "finally, quakepaw, your mentor will be direfang. he is a very experienced knight, and i'm sure that you are in very capable paws, and that you'll pick up many skills from him." though the silver warrior was an intimidating presence in the clan, quiet and stern-looking, his eyes were soft when he stepped forward to meet quakepaw, and he smiled. "i'll teach you everything i've learned over the moons. it won't be easy, though," he said, and quakepaw grinned. "i'll do my best," she promised, and direfang dipped his head, pleased with her answer. as tawnyrose stepped down to join softglow and bluetcrest, the clan swelled with excitement and congratulations. hollandkit padded to where snowypaw was talking to hurricanepaw and tsunamipaw, and snowypaw turned to his friend. "i wish i was joining you all. i want to start training too." snowypaw smiled sympathetically, touching his nose to his friend's ear. "you will really soon, i know it. and then we'll all be able to train together," he said at the same time that adenium joined the group. the pretty tortoiseshell offered her congratulations to the newest thorns before nudging snowypaw's shoulder. "otterfur said that we have to help them make room for nests since hawthornpaw and bramblepaw are out for training," adenium said, shrugging her shoulders. she flicked her ear at tsunamipaw and quakepaw. "i'll show you where we get moss, and you can decide where you want to sleep. though i do recommend staying far away from elkpaw... he snores like a bear." when the group of mollies headed out, snowypaw turned back to hollandkit, who frowned. "can't i come help you?" hollandkit asked, his pale green eyes wide. "i'm a moon younger than tornadopaw and the others, i can do it." snowypaw hesitated for a moment before he stopped, not wanting to make his friend upset. "i think that'd be alright... besides, we have to make sure that they don't take the spot next to my nest, so you can take it next moon." at that, hollandkit lit up and followed snowypaw away from the excitement, taking large, quick steps to keep up. the clan was in high spirits, and he would have a mentor of his own soon enough. the thought made his chest feel full.
dust swirled in the air, stinging hawthornpaw's eyes, and he hesitated, unable to react quickly enough when hornetshade called out to him. "watch your paws, hawthornpaw, don't let him get inside your defense," his tabby mentor shouted, but it was too late. his brother's weight hit him sideways, sending him sprawling. bramblepaw's tail lashed excitedly when he was sure that he had pinned hawthornpaw to the ground, and the smaller tabby spit out grit. "you cheated," hawthornpaw complained, using his hind paws to unseat his brother. he scowled, though he wasn't actually angry, but he sat up with a huff and began to wipe his eyes clear with a paw. "you blinded me from dragging your paws and kicking up too much dirt." "it wasn't cheating, it was a strategy," bramblepaw retorted with an amused twitch of his ears. "birchflame says that its good to confuse your opponent. you're faster than i am, so i need to find a way to keep you from darting away too much. i need to disorient you." "and it did work quite well, didn't it?" birchflame said from the other side of the clearing, jutting his nose in hornetshade's direction. "your mentor is right. you needed to keep bramblepaw from getting too close to you." "because he's bigger than i am," hawthornpaw added, finding some sense of satisfaction when hornetshade padded over to give him an affectionate nudge. though hornetshade certainly wasn't the warmest mentor to work with, he was rewarding, and there was a never a moment when hawthornpaw didn't feel as though he was learning something. so much so that he made sure to keep his eyes pricked and eyes peeled whenever hornetshade was trying to teach him something. "but i didn't even know where he was to try to get out of the way." hornetshade hummed thoughtfully, taking him time to glance between the twin brothers. "so then, what could you do if it ever happened again? think, hawthornpaw. you'll never know what could happen in the middle of battle. maybe the ground will get kicked up and you won't be able to see your paws in front of you. or maybe your vision will be obstructed in another way. what could you do to save yourself?" hawthornpaw looked to birchflame, but he knew that his brother's mentor wouldn't be any help in answering hornetshade's question. it seemed that bramblepaw was trying to think as well, and hawthornpaw scuffed his paw in the dust. "well, if the dust is thick enough, bramblepaw might not have been able to see me either, and he would've been aiming for where i was last standing, right?" he said, looking between the two knights. "if i had moved out of the way originally, he wouldn't have aimed correctly to hit me, and i would've had the chance to recover." hornetshade purred and nodded slowly. "good head, hawthornpaw. keep your paws moving, always, that's first. the second is to use your head. you can't let a little dust make you give up. you need to be able to adapt in a heartbeat during a battle, since it's very rare when your plan and ideas of how the fight will go, will go that way." "that's good advice for you too, bramblepaw," birchflame said as he joined the group. "things don't always go the way we planned, so its important to keep your head clear and stay on your toes. like hornetshade said, keep moving and be able to adapt." "it seems like the training is going well here," softglow's voice sounded, and hawthornpaw brightened. "dad!" hawthornpaw bounded over to greet his father by touching his nose to softglow's shoulder, and the king dipped his head to rest his muzzle against hawthornpaw's head. however, when bramblepaw padded over and hawthornpaw backed up, he noticed that, while hornetshade had settled down to take a short break with softglow's arrival, birchflame's fur seemed to stand on-end, bristling from the interruption. when hawthornpaw looked back at softglow, the king flicked his ear when he met birchflame's gaze. "don't let me interrupt you, everything i heard was good. i'd like to stay and watch for a few minutes, if i may." hornetshade shrugged, not seeming to care either way, though birchflame fixed the king with a furious stare. "you don't think we're good enough mentors that we need to be watched?" he asked, but softglow merely blinked. "and isn't it a bit of a conflict for you to watch over their training?" "i think a father can separate his feelings long enough to train them, if its for the best," softglow said mildly while bramblepaw and hawthornpaw exchanged a confused look. even hornetshade appeared shocked that birchflame would address softglow in that manner. birchflame's hackles began to rise with agitation before he turned away sharply. "you aren't their mentor," birchflame muttered darkly under his breath, though softglow made no indication whether or not he heard the sharp retort. instead he padded to the side of the hollow where he settled, wrapping his tail neatly over his paws to watch the rest of the session. as birchflame began to direct the thorns, hornetshade joined the king and sniffed expectantly. "he might have bees in his fur," the tabby knight commented quietly to softglow, who turned his bright blue eyes to the younger tom. hornetshade smiled at his own joke, and softglow was struck, for a brief moment, by how muh hornetshade had grown. when he first arrived at highgarden, his fur with still kitten-soft and his eyes were wide. moons of training and patrolling had hardened his muscles and his green eyes gained depth and knowledge. hornetshade stil had his rough moments, no doubt, but softglow looked from hornetshade to bramblepaw and hawthornpaw while he wondered where the moons had gone. "i'm sure its been a long day. it can be tiring," softglow added, though he knew that hornetshade had been unnerved by birchflame's agitation. his tail tip twitched when birchflame oversaw the thorns as they began to tussle, raking their paws through the dust as they attempted to aim blows and confuse his brother. "they're both so strong," softglow murmured after several moments of watching the queen's sons. but when he glanced towards hornetshade, he realized that the knight's gaze continued to train on softglow's face. "you know, i've always wondered why none of the kits looked like you," hornetshade said, turning away only when softglow remained silent. "lightkit looked just like tawnyrose but her sons... i guess you would've hoped one of your sons might have looked like you," he added, shrugging after a moment, and softglow merely watched as birchflame padded around the clearing, his frame wide, showcasing broad shoulders and his short, sleek pelt. only pawsteps away, hawthornpaw managed to trip bramblepaw, sending him sprawling onto his back. bramblepaw certainly had the familiar broad frame, and hawthonpaw was a graceful, natural fighter. hornetshade cleared his throat and lowered his voice. "no one seems to question it, or tawnyrose, especially after lightkit. and birchflame isn't soft on them, but..." he trailed off and shrugged his shoulders, leaving the rest unsaid. it was clear that birchflame cared about the thorns, and his interest in their training could be confused as simply a mentor's affection and investment. "i think you've always been more perceptive than most, hornetshade," softglow said at last. "but i also hope that i can depend on your loyalty, and that you know that this is best for the clan." hornetshade said nothing more. he dipped his head before called out to hawthornpaw as his thorn lost his footing and allowed bramblepaw the chance to knock him down and pin him to the ground. softglow watched the rest of the training, though he didn't miss the way that bramblepaw and hawthornpaw glanced warily between himself and birchflame, or the way that birchflame refused to speak to softglow, even when hornetshade tried to strike up a conversation among the group. when they reached the camp and hornetshade padded off to greet iguanasports and warblercry, hawthornpaw turned to softglow, his eyes glowing. "did you like watching us, dad?" bramblepaw brightened as well, waving his tail. "were you proud?" birchflame turned away, his ears pressed flat to his head, but softglow nuzzled the pair affectionately. "you always make me proud," he said, and he meant it. as if they were of his own blood.
"mom, you've gotta watch me!" elkpaw urged as the family gathered together in the evening dusk. around them, the rest of the clan had begun to settled in for the night as the final patrols returned from the far borders of highgarden's territory. "pythoneyes has been showing me some more advanced stalking and fighting techniques, he says i should make sure to get them right for my assessment." he lowered himself close to the ground in a low crouch, his long fur nearly brushing the ground as elkpaw took several slow, creeping steps forward. "did he tell you to step extra heavily while crouching?" dewpaw asked her brother after she dropped a mouse at ferretwhisker's paws. "i don't think you'll be able to sneak up on anything when you're lumbering around like that." ferretwhisker family bonding with the siblings + ferretwhisker is excited for more kits - sibling banter, they ask about nightfur ("does that make him our dad") and asking about montgomery
betonypetal is getting very anxious and tells clovershine and merlinsong but they don't know what to make of it
tawnyrose dreams about lightkit and then flood foreshadowing time, then she wakes up in time to hear clovershine's sobs from the nursery
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Nov 10, 2020 22:00:44 GMT -8
betonypetal's funeral and the intro for her kits, clovershine isn't dealing at all
robinpaw's introduction including apprentice development
sandstrike and privetears talk about starting their family
daystrike and leopardsun get into a petty fight and leopardsun runs off and winds up meeting smokemask uh-oh
tawnyrose is talking to erasmus and softglow finds her and they get into a big fight because tawnyrose is stressed tf out
yewbloom and wolverinesnap get away from camp for a while and talk about all of the problems and how they're coping. they also bring up starting a family
erasmus gets a roommate !!
clovershine won't leave the nursery and everyone is concerned for him
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eagle
Global Moderator
Posts: 293
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Post by eagle on Nov 10, 2020 22:15:23 GMT -8
pov softglow and his patrol getting lost in the blizzard
winter is hard for all of the patrols and softglow and his patrol get lost,,, oh no. so bluetcrest leads a patrol to find them and tawnyrose finally shows Some Concern and merlinsong is inconsolable
spencer takes over in the herbalist's den because everyone is getting sick this moon and the patrols haven't gotten back yet and everyone is getting increasingly worried. and erasmus and driftripple is sick and spencer has to help him ft. tension and driftripple offering some classic comic relief
side character development time!! comforting one another and doing their best to carry on!!
hornetshade talks to ferretwhisker and admits that he cares about warblercry and he really misses her and just wants her to be safe. ferretwhisker comforts him
the patrols finally return home and it's been a very stressful moon. but a lot of hurt/comfort for everyone
welcoming the patrol back, tawnyrose is in better health, and hollandpaw gets his ceremony
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